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Genieinabottle
46-50, M
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485 views · 21 followers · Online: Weeks ago
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Do you know how hard it is getting up every day and adulting when all you want is to end it?
Why can i fear death, appreciate life and desperately want to kill myself?
I want to die. Dont you think if my son knew how badly i am suffering he.would let me lay down in.green fields and finally rest?
Why do I feel like I am going to break down into tears all the time?
Are there any III%’rs here?
Why do i have to endure and SUFFER daily with depression and mental illness so that people around me dont have to mourn me in the event of my death?
Has the absence of pain or sorrow replaced your experience of happiness?
I no longer live in a world of happy and sad. My life is sadness and pain or the absence of sorrow or.pain. The best I can hope for is not to want to die most days.
I am struggling with a reason to go on. What keeps you getting up each day?
How much of your truth have you confided in a single person?
I am 48 and people in their twenties seen far stupider than we were at that age. I wonder if that is just age talking or if it's a real
If it is a consequence of too much bubble wrapping kids to keep them safe and they learn none of life's lessons. If it is a consequence of schooling being driven down to the lowest common denominator. If out is a consequence of the massive drop...
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Is it fair to say that "adulting" is mainly comprised of tolerating shit that bothers you to some degree?
Do you ever think about your own death in the past tense
I envision people talking about me...."did you hear Joshua shot himself?"
How do you break down a confident and capable operator?
You tell him he is useless and a piece of shit for about six solid months.
Do you have any experience with ECT? Good? Bad? Thoughts?
So, I tell my therapist....
I live in fear of my doctor taking away my drugs. What do you fear?
If today was the high water mark for the rest of your life would it be worth going on?
What if today was the best your life will ever be and every day is down hill from here?
I have struggled with suicidal thoughts for DECADES. I wonder if eventually I will just give in one day.
It took me years of planning but I finally figured a fool proofed way to end it and have my insurance pay off for certain. Secret, but can u guess?
I struggle with suicidal thoughts at least a few times a week. Do you as well?
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