Would you pursue or marry a person with a chronic disease?

DrWatson · 70-79, M

I am married to someone with mental illness and many physical ailments. We celebrated our 41st anniversary in June.

When I married her, I did not know she would develop these things, of course. But the experience has taught me that if I were in a hypothetical world in which I were single, yes I would be open to marrying someone with a chronic disease if I loved her and thought she was a good person.

Mamapolo2016 · F

I’m 74. I couldn’t pursue a snail. But if by some fluke of fate I caught him and he was who I wanted, there would be no problem about a chronic illness.

You love somebody or you don’t.

HootyTheNightOwl

I don't consider health as part of the criteria when looking for a partner - it's just something that has to be worked with.

Even if they are in peak fitness today... what says that they will be the same way tomorrow???

ViciDraco · 41-45, M

Depending on care level required, whether it is terminal and how near, and how far into pursuit I am when I learn about it would all be factors. I would probably be dissuaded from starting something with someone beyond my level of caregiving ability or who is terminal with a few years or less to live.

But if it is someone I have already bonded with and then something happens to them, I'm far less likely to drop the relationship. I'm more than likely to continue if we had already been engaged, for example. But if we've been dating for just a couple of weeks my tolerance would likely be lower.

JamesBugman

I dated a girl who said she had leukemia although it wasn't possible to tell on the surface.
I wasn't ready to get married then, so the thought never occurred to me, but if I had loved her I probably would have.

Baremine · 70-79, C

It is amazing what you will endure for the person you love. The mistakes the hurts and the beginning of not remembering some special memories. Some of it may be not wanting to remember.

dancingtongue · 80-89, M

My last partner had COPD, and had had it for some time.

bijouxbroussard · F

If I loved them, sure. At our age, a lot of us are managing such ailments.

Cigarguy · 41-45, M

My partner took me with my mental health issues and heart issues.

Journaling4Me · 56-60, F

I don't do the pursing, but if I loved someone with a chronic disease, I would marry them...🙂

CrazyMusicLover · 31-35

It would be hypocritical from me if I said no. So I say it depends on the disease and if they require care and to what extent.

exexec · 70-79, C

Yes. Because I love them, I would want to help them deal with their illness.

nazgul · 26-30, F

My current partner is chronically ill and I will probably marry him within a couple of years unless something goes horribly awry.

2ndtimeguy · 61-69, M

I know my cousin had brain cancer and was dating a guy when it reared its ugly head for the last time he married her knowing the time was short but also meant he could take care of all her affairs legally as her husband