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Streamofconsciousness

31-35, T

Separated

Pansexual

Discussion, Friends, Advice, Stories, Learning

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449 views · 9 followers · Joined: February 27, 2020 · Online: See Last Online »

If you’re a creep, I’ll ignore you

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Loving someone with a mood disorder is hard

I feel completely in a haze, and it sucks. I have little motivation to do anything except sleep, but I can't sleep because I am too busy with work, relationship issues, and other responsibilities. I would say it's like depression, except I am...

Finally wrote it off

I finally left my mentally abusive partner. It took me years to figure out what he was doing. All the psychological mind trips. The gaslighting. The deflections and unhealthy need to continuously argue without ever wanting resolution. I am so glad...

I attract way too many people

An older man, this middle-aged guy that annoyed me, and even a married woman were hitting on me the other day at a party. The only problem is they're all my neighbours. The older man and I have a weird connection, but I think it would look...

I’m finally splitting up with my partner [I Am Going Through a Breakup]

He’s not been so great to me, and I know I deserve peace and respect of my boundaries.

I Loved Reading This Book

Yesterday, I finished reading Ursula Le Guin's novel The Left Hand of Darkness. It was amazing. It was powerful and wise. I recommend reading it. I read her other novel, The Dispossessed, some years ago. I've also read a few of her short stories, and...

I Am Always Trying to Improve Myself

I've been doing a lot of inner-work lately. My latest foci are: childhood trauma and establishing healthy boundaries. In this post, I will focus on healthy boundaries. Every time one speaks their boundaries, it causes an ultimatum: will the other...

I Want to Lose Weight

It’s been 5 weeks since I started working out, and I have only lost 2kg :( I’m not ginormous by any means, so losing weight is going to be slow. I just didn’t expect it to be this slow. I think I need to change up my diet for a week or so to jump...

What kind of government works the best?

Feel free to combine a few. Chop them up, re-conglomerate them, make a one-of-a-kind government. The more unique or obscure, the better! The world is your political oyster in this very hypothetical moment.

I Think About Thinking

I think a lot. I also meditate a lot and get out of my head when in nature. When I workout, which is 4-5 times a week, I go into a sublime state of freedom. My body feels firmly grounded, but my mind is levitating beyond the physical realm, as if in...

I Have Stories Inside Me That I Haven't Written Yet

One day I hope to write my stories out for the world to see. I've had a hard time reading novels lately because I feel like I have so many words in my mind already and can't handle more words. It's so strange. I think the solution is to let it all...

I Overthink And Over Analyze Everything

It's something I really hate doing. At the same time, I only overthink a situation for a day or two, then I'm good at moving past it. During those 24-48 hours, it can be so hard on me. I keep replaying a situation or a feeling or multiple past...

I Like To Journal

One thing I cannot stand is confusion. Sadly, I am easily confused. Human behaviour, besides my own, makes little sense to me. It seems most people are not fully aware of why they do what they do, which confuses me because I almost always know what I...

We might be moving to a new city due to my partner's recent job offer. I'm really bummed by this. I've got all of my friends here, my community, everything I've grown familiar with. There's enough chaos in this world, and I was hoping for a little...

I Seem To Be Nothing But One Large Stream Of Consciousness

this is me and this will most definitely be a waste of time for anyone to try reading as there will be no punctuation or capitalisation or anything of the sort the goal is to let the words flow without deterrence although my own mind often finds ways...

I miss the old days on the internet, where there were good chatrooms and people were more friendly. It seems so different now. All of the good sites have shut down, and the only sites that remain are social media-based. I never used to have a hard...

I Want to Lose Weight

I don’t want to lose an excessive amount. I’m hoping to lose 8 or 9kg. So far I’ve lost a little over 1kg. I know it’s not much, but it’s a start. I’ve been working out for two weeks now. Due to injuring my lower back from poor posture, I had to take...

I Have Days When I'm Sad

Today is one of those sad days. I have been teaching online for a meagre salary, but since the virus spread out of China, bookings have been incredibly low. I was building up my platform and doing fairly well, only for it all to take a major hit. The...

Bow against the power of my slender hand, and I might pull back the arrow gently. There is no weakness in knowing where you stand. Relinquish to the magnetism of divinity. That lust you think is in my eye, reflects a desperate need for my immortal...

I Love Singing, But I'm Too Shy To Sing In Public

I love to sing. I’m very good at it, but I get so shy and become my own worst enemy due to having perfect pitch. Lately, though, I’ve become so good that I’m finding it hard to even criticise.

It's amazing how in some lights a person can look like an absolute fool, but in other lights that same someone can wow the world. I try to remember that when I am shining and also when I make a fool out of myself. There is much harsh criticism of...

I Want to Escape From Reality At Times

Sometimes, I can no longer decipher which is which. When fantasy entangles with reality, like sheets unkempt, writhing together, inescapable. Yes, the thrill of it all overwhelms me. The trees have never looked so pristine. I'm on the ganja...

Is there an App for Similar Worlds?

Will there ever be one, if there's not?

My current mood is Massive Attack- Teardrop, and Portishead- Roads.

Beneath the forgotten shadows of a house once home- though home no more, it whispers the continuous reminder of past and abandoned future They pivot against one another in a feud of melancholy. Nostalgia burns the air, and the dreams weep in despair...

I haven't written poetry in a while. I'm going to use this account to practice. It might be a bit of a stream of incoherent babbling. It might be brilliant. It might be horrid. It's me, though, all of it. I love it all as I love myself. Will you love...

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