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Humor me, and take this seriously. Pretend SW is a dating app and you are fighting for your life to be seen. What would your profile say? Describe

yourself/situation/soul in grand detail. [i]And please don't just complain that SW is the last place you would go to find a date[/i]
itsok · 31-35, F
@foldedunfolding the things we do for love 😏
foldedunfolding · 36-40, FVIP
@itsok oh naw girl..this is you and raccoons; i could nevahh lol
justlooking2023 · 51-55, M
@itsok You can't beat a humerous raccoon cross-stitch.
Jeephikelove · 46-50, F
I know I have LOTS to offer but lets face it guys want to know only a few things.

Single, young at heart geeky woman, who enjoys camping, fishing, sitting at a backyard fire listening to music and will watch a hockey or ball game with you. I’m a pretty good cook so keeping your belly satisfied is not a problem. I have a job that I love. I’m not vanilla so hopefully you know what that means. We can discuss more as we get to know each other.

What I want from you: good communication, honesty, respect and loyalty and a good sense of humour.
justlooking2023 · 51-55, M
@Jeephikelove Sometimes being how often and what examples?
Jeephikelove · 46-50, F
@justlooking2023 lol I’m not sharing my fetish list on here as far as how often depends on many factors.
justlooking2023 · 51-55, M
@Jeephikelove lol, please message and maybe we can compare notes?
Chief, 26 going on 27
Waiting on the baby from baby mama #1 but looking for baby mama #2 in the meantime 😏
Jkjk😂 I'll pretend I'm single for a sec

Chief, 26 going on 27
I like good weed & good food. We can get high & fat together & that'd be some comfy shit 😌 plus I learned these cool tricks I can do with my tongue
foldedunfolding · 36-40, FVIP
@ChiefWalksWith40oz idek..mud?
@foldedunfolding roll in some mud with me then 🫠
foldedunfolding · 36-40, FVIP
@ChiefWalksWith40oz but then we would both become unlikeable with each other?
Sojournersoul · 100+, M
Hey there I love spending my time outdoors whether it’s hiking, camping, biking, or just playing around in the park.

I work as a independent contractor and I love it but I also try to make time for the things I’m passionate about like cooking, reading, and music

I’m looking for someone who is active and loves spending time outdoors as much as I do.
foldedunfolding · 36-40, FVIP
@Sojournersoul love it..great profile!
Sojournersoul · 100+, M
@foldedunfolding Thank you.
JovialMoose · 46-50, M
Building Flames, Not Sparks

Greetings! I'm a firm believer that true connections take time to develop. While I may not believe in love at first sight, I'm convinced that shared flames are worth the investment.

I pride myself on being independent and value the freedom to pursue my passions. However, I believe life is richer when experiences are shared. While I enjoy my solo adventures, I'm more than willing to explore new hobbies and create memorable moments with a partner who appreciates both independence and shared experiences.

If you appreciate the idea of building a connection over time and believe in the magic that happens when two people truly connect, I'd love to get to know you better. Let's share a coffee and see if our flames align.
Jeephikelove · 46-50, F
@JovialMoose That would be a great profile. I’d ❤️ you.
turnedtostone · 56-60, F
Boring middle aged woman
Hobbies include being a smart mouth, lying about ,and occasionally doing something useful.
I don't want to be desperate enough to lie so you might as well know that I'm not really interested in dating, because I am already married.
But, I am intrigued by people fighting for their life to be seen.
Call it research for a book about desperation and how it effects the human psyche.
justlooking2023 · 51-55, M
@turnedtostone i know, was just playing the fool.
turnedtostone · 56-60, F
@justlooking2023 you are fine
I'm just a smart mouth
justlooking2023 · 51-55, M
@turnedtostone lol, at least you didn't tell me to go get stuffed like that turkey.
AlienFox · F
AlienFox, 39

Seeking a meaningful connection. Adventurous, caring, low-maintenance and poetically moody. I will keep your heart safe and your life interesting.

I love outdoors and animals. I don't mind getting dirty or cleaning up to go dancing. 420 friendly.

Let's start a Beastie Boys cover band.
AlienFox · F
@foldedunfolding lol he's already asked out someone else...

I'm always last choice 😂
foldedunfolding · 36-40, FVIP
@AlienFox which was strange, being that i mentioned you first, and she hadnt yet commented or spoken about outdoorsy-ness lol
AlienFox · F
@foldedunfolding men 🤷🏼‍♀️
JRVanguard · 26-30, M
Josh, 26 He, Him, His

Looking for someone to occasionally laugh at my jokes while we build a blanket fort together.

Shy and a little awkward but a people pleaser. Very loving and caring once I warm up to you. Loves gaming, movies and pro wrestling.

Reach out if you wanna make up small things to celebrate to rationalize us getting ice cream at 3AM.
foldedunfolding · 36-40, FVIP
@JRVanguard omggg i would go gagaaaa over this profile..A1.
JRVanguard · 26-30, M
@foldedunfolding Thank you🥰
I was trying to capture a lot of myself in this without sounding arrogant or talking about myself too much
I still think it can use some work but on short notice I’m happy with it
GuiltyBiStander · 31-35, F
I'm a Fucking Angel :

Now lets pretend I love dick pix too 😬
@GuiltyBiStander 🙏🏻
Luckylu · 61-69, F
How about we dance the night away?
If you can lead,
I can follow,
Or just place me on your toes
And we’ll sway
As our souls
Bleed into tomorrow.

If you have a heart meant for loving,
I’ll have eyes only for you,
As you look deep into my soul
You’ll know I’m the one for you.
With warm hands ready to sooth you
On those cold harsh winter nights
We only need each other
Through each and every night.

We’ll look at the moon
Its phases slip through our gaze
As we grow and change
Never wishing we were the same
We’ll stick by each other
Through thick and thin
Until our lives ebb and flow
Like the waters and the wind.

We were meant to be
Its very clear to see
If you read this
And know
I’ve been yours
Since the first dance began.
Montanaman · M
@Luckylu 👍👍♥️♥️Best Comment 👍🤗♥️
It's already there, taken from my profile...

[quote]“There is not a monster more dangerous than a lack of compassion.” – Master Splinter



Nah, just don't... Shh... Just don't. Unless we know each other already. B-butt... Seriously, just don't. M'kay!

The photos I post on this site won't be any of myself. I won't share any private photos. It's a period, like a lot of other stuff will be. If I told you once I won't share something with you, it simply means I won't. No matter what stuff you try to pull. I've trusted one too many already.

You made it this far... Ookaaayy... You asked for it... rants and sarcasm ahead... Goes for feminism, LGBTQ+ rights, and against religions and politics when questioning the former!

Anything else..? Oh... Right... Haters...

Hey! Let's be careful out there. Over and out!
GuiltyBiStander · 31-35, F
GuiltyBiStander · 31-35, F
Montanaman · M
Nothing different. Nothing new...

My emotions reflect off the screen,
They pour from my eyes,
Seep from my veins,
And I'm blinded by the intensity of "feelings."
Keeping them hidden, I do my best,
But in the end,
They're exposed for all to see.
Naked and in your face,
Just like me-
Take it, or leave it.
foldedunfolding · 36-40, FVIP
@Montanaman very emotional dude right here 💗
This looks fun! I've never used a dating site or anything for the simple reason that I can't try to sell anyone on this train wreck. Imma have to think about this one for a bit 🤔
nedkelly · 61-69, M
I speak my mind and if you are offended not my fault
Very loyal like a mongrel dog
My kids and grandkids will always come first
"I'm moody, difficult, cognitive and cant meet my own expectations .
...Wanna try ?"

I have no idea wot id write . It's very hard to be objective about myself 🤷
foldedunfolding · 36-40, FVIP
@OogieBoogie haha aw thank you..if i had a penny for everyone who gives me their resume to edit haha..a chick at work said, "give it to brittany..she will make it sound LIVE."
Sojournersoul · 100+, M
@OogieBoogie Coffee? 😉
@Sojournersoul 😂🤣😂
justlooking2023 · 51-55, M
Difficult to put into words.
foldedunfolding · 36-40, FVIP
@justlooking2023 what would you give a consultant to work with?
justlooking2023 · 51-55, M
@foldedunfolding A pizza and a pitcher of the finest beer?
foldedunfolding · 36-40, FVIP
Straylight · F
I’ve literally never used a dating site. I’m bad at talking about myself unprompted.
foldedunfolding · 36-40, FVIP
@Straylight FORTUNATELY, you have been [i]prompted 😏[/i]
A man for all seasons and no other reason. That would just be my tagline for starters
I think I'd leave it as it is.

Wonderfully cunty.

The tag seems to be an opening point for many.
This which is on all my profiles:
4 things- Trust Honest Communication and Respect.

Do you have the 6 C's in Mind; Chemistry Communication Compatibility Commitment Compromise. Caring.

Looking for someone normal..
Sojournersoul · 100+, M
This should be interesting to see what people will say about themselves. How do you make yourself stand out in a sea of fish.
foldedunfolding · 36-40, FVIP
@Sojournersoul 1..2..3..GO
Sojournersoul · 100+, M
@foldedunfolding Have to give it a little thought.
Hello there, Junky here, do you like to be read to? Or watch films with subtitles, call 888-8900 for your free brochure.
Okay, what the hell.

Single, middle-aged white guy who likes horror movies, video games, RPGs, and fishing. I have a great sense of humor, and I love to cook. Full of surprises.

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