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How do you move on from a break up?

I've had so many experiences in relationships and have broken or been broken up with several times. I don't understand why this cut the deepest. It's so hard to move on. I feel stuck. It has been 2 weeks but it felt like forever. There are days when I feel like I'm getting through it and then not anymore. Also, I'm struggling not to stalk his socials.
JRVanguard · 26-30, M
Time heals
Distract yourself
You’ll go through the motions
There will be regret and a feeling of loss at first but eventually you’ll realize you’re away from a situation that was getting less and less happy, you can focus on yourself and that there are more people out there who can make you happy
When I went through a breakup someone told me “You’ll make new memories with better people” and that’s always stuck with me
Good luck
Here if you need a friend🫂
Or a distraction *Juggles*
JRVanguard · 26-30, M
@nym3ria I think it’s natural to only see the negative and feel a little hopeless after something like this
But things are sunnier than we think they are
You’ll meet someone I’m sure
And the one thing about every relationship is that we learn more about ourselves
Maybe during your relationship you were like “I love him but hate XYZ about him”. Now when you’re ready to get back into dating you can go “I won’t be with someone who does XYZ”. Stuff like that. I believe in you🤗
nym3ria · 31-35, F
@JRVanguard yeah you're right. but i think i still have the rose-colored glasses on to actually focus on the bad stuff I didn't like about him or the relationship haha. but thank you so much! this has been helpful. I know it's a learning process. My mind just keeps telling me this was it even tho it most certainly did not look like it was. 😅
JRVanguard · 26-30, M
@nym3ria When you’re hurt you focus on what’s missing, when you’re healing you focus on what you’re free of. It’s a fresh wound still, you’ll get there 🤗
Happy to help 🫂
in10RjFox · M
It means that you are going too hard in your relationship and get entangled in a complex manner. A break up psychologically damages you and makes you feel inferior and you are just unable to take it that you were rejected.

So the best way forward is be light and add on relationships so there is no break up.
Time heals all wounds. The grieving process is unique for everyone so it may take more time for some than others. Just know that you will get through it and you'll be stronger for it. Be gentle with yourself, and stay busy so you don't have to 'think about thinking'.
nym3ria · 31-35, F
@DreamyCrush thank you ❤️
SeaGlass · F
Distraction plus time. Definitely don't stalk socials, that just prolongs the process
nym3ria · 31-35, F
@SeaGlass Distraction is so hard cause I remember him in everything. We have the same hobbies so anything I do it reminds me of him 😢
SeaGlass · F
@nym3ria It'll take a lot of effort and persistence to make it a habit to leave him behind. You can do it
It's an absolutely horrible feeling and time feels like it's moving so slow.

But don't let it get to you. Find stuff to do to keep you busy and better your life.

It's not going to do anything for you if you stalk him. If he knew your value he wouldn't have left you.

You know your worth. It might take some time but someone to appreciate you will come to you eventually

Jus focus on yourself, your job, career, health, or fitness or anything else other than another relationship and the right one will happen
shakemeup · 36-40
I heard there was a study done that found out that if you get attached to the person you were seeing, the average time it takes to get over it is 3 months. If you weren't close, it might be more like 3 weeks.

I'd suggest patience and compassion for yourself. You need to adjust. What always helped me was keeping busy. I'd exercise more, cook more, go out with friends more. pick up a hobby that I've neglected to do in years...etc.
nym3ria · 31-35, F
@shakemeup first part is so interesting and it makes sense. cause when there's more attachment to the person, the bond is harder and takes longer to break. thank you! ❤️
The fastest way to get over someone is to become interested in someone else but it might not be the most sensible unless you’re just looking for a bit of fun. So accept that time is all you need but I feel that if we’re truly meant to be with someone then we might never move on but we won’t feel sad forever and no matter what happens our priorities will change.
nym3ria · 31-35, F
@Gingerbreadspice yeah, as tempting as that sounds I'd like to heal in a healthier way 😅 but i agree, it just takes time. I'll get through it no matter what. These comments have been helpful! Thank you ❤️
astrosandorbits · 26-30, M
Im currently going through a terrible breakup too at the moment. I broke up with my finace. What youre going through... im going through it too and it is so difficult. If you ever need to talk about it... im here. It has been a month ago and some days i feel im getting better and then some days like today im really struggling so much...
nym3ria · 31-35, F
@astrosandorbits couldn't imagine breaking up with a fiance. Feels like that would be worse. 😢
Wol62 · 51-55, M
So, allow yourself to experience your feelings, knowing they are temporary. Reach out to friends and family who are supportive. Connecting with others will make you feel less alone. And, try to find a balance between talking about the break-up and engaging in other topics/activities.
nym3ria · 31-35, F
@Wol62 yeah. I heard that talking about it too much won't help in the long run. But thanks for the advice! ❤️
Wol62 · 51-55, M
@nym3ria No, it's fine. Thank for reading it and I do hope that it helps you moving forward.
smileylovesgaming · 31-35, F
U just got to move on
By not thinking about it.
ABCDEF7 · M
[media=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7onT2EuP_2c]
Take some time off it's natural to feel low and bad. Engage yourself in physical exercises it will help you alot of good
GunFinger · F
Attend some workshops, get a hobby, keep yourself busy. Go out with friends or family, connect with other people. When you suddenly think about your past relationships, think of happy thoughts. It all takes time. I've been there too. Don't forget you can cry too, but it will pass.
Rambler · M
More than anything else...time.
Court69 · M
Have revenge sex
Dino11 · M
masterofyou · 70-79, M
It's going to take a lot time to heal a broken 💔 heart princess 😕 I've been there, and broken a few myself.....
nym3ria · 31-35, F
@masterofyou yeah, i know there's nothing I can do to rush it. 🙁
Jeephikelove · 46-50, F
Feel your feelings, take time to reflect, maybe he was an Avoidant, those hurt. 🤗
Rokan · 31-35, M
I just set a rule and wont break it no matter what
nym3ria · 31-35, F
@Rokan what kind of rule?
Rokan · 31-35, M
@nym3ria like this is the last time ill talk to said person or i wont check their social media.
robertsnj · 56-60, M
talk to us..what happened 🤗
robertsnj · 56-60, M
@nym3ria nobody lacks in relationships. couples are either compatible or incompatible don't beat yourself up with that line of thought.

how long were you together? did you want to marry him at one time? what do you want in a relationship ? do you have kids---I guess question (and you don't owe me an answer) since you are dating men--is sex fun with the right guy?
nym3ria · 31-35, F
@robertsnj i guess you're right...think it was the insecurity building up since I keep getting rejected by him. it was like, i found myself constantly trying to prove my worth to him which I haven't done that in my past relationships.

A little over a year. We broke up once and got back together after 2 months. I did want to marry him. I thought that was it. I just want safety and security, the most basic stuff. I mean I guess? It should be right?
robertsnj · 56-60, M
@nym3ria hugs i hope you feel better talking about it . You sound like a good catch. I bet you will have a stronger relationship with someone special on your horizion.
mainvane · 61-69, M
to get over some one...get under someone
nym3ria · 31-35, F
@mainvane lmao i'm trying to move on and heal in the healthiest way possible, so i'm not gonna do that 😆 thanks tho!
ViciDraco · 36-40, M
Perhaps you were more attached to this one being there for the rest of your life more than you were the others before. It's not just the relationship that feels broken but the future as a whole?

I cannot say I have any solid advice for you. Things ended for a reason. Just because the future might be scarier now doesn't mean you cannot remember the good times fondly while trying to move forward. Wishing you the best.
nym3ria · 31-35, F
@ViciDraco that makes sense because I did feel that with this one. But i'm starting to slowly realize that it happened for a reason. It's just hard on some days... Thank you!
ViciDraco · 36-40, M
@nym3ria Yeah. With time the hard days become fewer, but they'll still crop up for a while. It takes a lot of strength to keep the mind in charge of the heart, so you are doing well so far.
nym3ria · 31-35, F
@ViciDraco yeah, gotta have that self discipline and self respect stronger than my feelings
Fa8393 · 36-40, M
Did he dump you ?
nym3ria · 31-35, F
@Fa8393 yeah...
SW-User
Get over me already lady. 🙄
You just do. You choose to.
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nym3ria · 31-35, F
@TheOneyouwerewarnedabout that is not a bad idea but he doesn't have a hot bestie 😭

 
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