controversial but genuine question

@Luckylu i love this answer. i am actually pro life writing this post! i believe in life lived abundantly! i even love children and loving parents! just pointing out that i think folks need to give this more thought than, "yeah i think i can handle two". i applaud your selflessness in this act, and grieve with you for any traumas surrounding it. you are a hero!

@foldedunfolding thank you for your comments. By definition a hero is: noun
1. a person who is admired or idealized for courage, outstanding achievements, or noble qualities. I am none of these. If you knew the whole story you would not call me a hero. I brought a child into the world with a man who already had 2 children he didn’t support. I was so terrified I would have another child while with him, I had a tubal ligation performed so I couldn’t have any more children, as soon as possible after her birth. After we split, he went on to have 2 more children again which he does not support, with a woman who was told she couldn’t have children. But that isn’t my story, other than I warned her when we met. He was abusive emotionally/mentally to me, and physically to others. I knew what kind of man he was and yet I was with him, bore a child with him, and still tried to make the relationship work. I have no idea if the problems she has today are due to him. I should have split from him when I found out I was pregnant, that would have been the courageous thing to do. Instead I stayed, moved across country and moved into another country, away from family and friends to be with him. And then spent 18 years raising her alone because I was too afraid to become involved again with another man. I didn’t trust my judgement of who would be good for us and who wouldn’t be. I couldn’t put my heart out there again. I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to.

@Luckylu im failing to see why i shouldnt see you as a hero here..you did all you could to not give birth to another of his babies..you escaped an evil man..you warned the future woman of your troubles..and you raised a full woman for 18 years alone, all the while protecting her and neglecting yourself.....

@foldedunfolding

I understand no rudeness was meant, but giving my son a better life and teaching him better ways, is for him, not for me, or to "rub in anyone's face."

@calicuz i definitely agree..there is selflessness in that, now that he is here. but i beseech amnesty when i ask: when you planned him, if you did, did you do it for his sake or your own? if you had to dig deep to answer.

@foldedunfolding

Wow, not ready to answer that one yet.

@Northwest but perpetuating such a horrid species is uncool in the extreme lol. and even if half the population didnt procreate, the world would at least be able to handle the few occupants it did have

@foldedunfolding Who decides who gets to procreate? The elite? We're not all that bad, and perhaps, one of these days, our species can live at peace, perhaps on Mars, where Musk will be revered as a God.

@Northwest oh now im just gonna off myself at THAT prospect ew

@Queendragonfly yep!! said better than i could myself! i think an act necessarily lacks selflessness if the person they are being "selfless" TOWARDS doesnt exist 🤣

well..i guess you can be selfless towards future folks by creating generational wealth, etc 🤔

@Queendragonfly Well, I'm starting to rethink. Right.. I guess there is no true selfless reason. I don't think it cancels out the reasons I said above.


I thought this question though:

Are we better off or worse off than our previous societies? Imagine living in medieval times where medical practices would make you raise an eyebrow. Maybe this world will always be terrible... but it might also be an improvement?

... debatable, I know

@caPnAhab I think it's improving but environmental wise, we are neglecting our planet.

@Queendragonfly yeah agreed. That much is easy to see

@NerdyPotato yeah exactly. like honestly i should sue my parents for emotional distress ha

@foldedunfolding Hanging out here can cause that lol

@kodiac ha nah this site actually gets me through some rough patches

@foldedunfolding Yup me to ,but there are times i just have to say wth!😅

@originnone that's the thing tho..it is so presumptuous that you can bring a little pet into the world, forge them in your own image, then be upset if they dont want to caregive later..idk

@foldedunfolding Yeah....I do get it....

@originnone that being said..i wish they would give you care for whatever it is you are going through..you are one of the good ones 😪

@foldedunfolding its a quality I admire and look for in people.
And I would certainly hope not 🙂

@Deceased also if i were calling something a galling practice, it most [b]certainly[b] would not be that which i have most perfected

@foldedunfolding oh my! Love that confidence. 💜🌹

@SW-User surrogacy is still bringing a life into the world, which i find near unforgivable, lol..but i can see how you could say it is unselfish towards the would-be parents

@fun4us2b it's so strange that the Bible always tells us to rise against our base instincts, but not on this one 🤔

@foldedunfolding Does the Bible actually say that - or is that how some interpret the Bible? All I ever see are stories, but maybe because that is what I look for.

Makes no sense for the Bible tell us to fight our nature.

@fun4us2b it tells us to lean not on our own understand, and to be above sin