Boys, most of us women - the best ones anyway - we don’t look for men with money. We want something far more valuable from you: Your happiest moments in life. And the simpler they are, the more perfect they are…
If you could sit down with a wild animal and ask them “what is the meaning of life?”They would probably answer “To grow up healthy from infancy to an adult, find a partner to love, and raise offspring in safety and security so that they might also grow to be healthy strong adults, and to spend the rest of your life surviving and...See More »
Sometimes I wish I was a guy. Six guys that have never met can get around a fire with beer and banter and talk like they’ve known each other forever.Put six girls around that same fire and at some point there’s going to be a snide remark. I’ll go sit with the guys…
How many times do you get introduced to someone all your friends like, but all you can think is“Something is really off with this person. How am I the only one who’s seeing it?.”
If we’re cancelling institutions for benefiting from slavery (and rightly so) why aren’t we cancelling the church for……the 50,000 people murdered in witch-hunts, the 30,000 killed during the inquisition and the approximate 1.2 million killed in Jewish pogroms? Not to mention the five crusades that killed millions?
Every morning my cat jumps out at me from behind a door. Yesterday I did it back. And now we aren’t speaking to each other.Apparently a line has been crossed. 😕
American tourist. Tips for survival free of charge:1. “Hi how are you?” Is an accessive amount of words for greeting a stranger. Don’t be surprised if “None of your business” is the reply. 2. Asking “where is the bathroom” makes people think you need a bath or shower. 3. Only in America are who...See More »
If you’re having a bad day remember, there’s a moron out there trying to pull open a door clearly marked push.
Kindness is undoubtedly the most powerful thing.Today my car broke down on my way to work, on a day when I had to be in early for a business critical project review. And I had no signal on my phone to call my recovery company. Out of nowhere a group of men on their way to a construction site...See More »
There’s no such thing a secret vegan, is there?They could be watching you eat something, and out it comes.
Gods help all of you if I ever achieve any kind of political power. I should live in a palace surrounded by servants. And I don’t care how many of you I need to smush to get it.
I know there is no pandemic - except perhaps stupidity. But I’d like continue to self isolate. Preferably in a wintery castle or palace.
Have you ever had a friend that tries to be in charge and the centre of attention?I’ve got to start straight off and say I’ve known this person for years and we’ve had great and memorable times. But when we go out now she has to be at the centre of things, deciding where we go and who we go with. And if I meet someone and have a...See More »
Cool awesome parents: The struggle is real 😂My parents met in the 90s, spent their nights in nightclubs all over Europe, partying with strangers, making wild friends they’d never see again but always remember, occasionally experimenting with drugs, they never hurt anyone, always saw the...See More »