If your best friend began talking of suicide and asked you not to tell anyone, would you be...

mindstruggle · 31-35, F

This one is heavy.
No, I would not honor that request because their safety is more important than keeping a secret. I would take it seriously and make sure they got help, even if it meant breaking their trust in that moment. Being a true friend means protecting them, especially when they’re at risk of harming themselves.

Cassieeeee · 31-35, F

I've been in this position several times, with different people.
If I thought that they would actually do it, I wouldn't.
I think a lot of people can talk in a suicidal way and not actually mean it or be capable of doing it. They just feel really down in the moment.
However - I usually follow my gut feeling, and I have no problem losing a friend because I didn't honor that request.

EzraIsShy76028 · 22-25

Hmmm...my answer might be different than most people's, as I myself have been suicidal very many times and tried to kill myself many, many times. The main reason I stopped was because I was tired of having to go to the mental hospital after several failed attempts. And even today, while I'm not trying to kill myself if I could just simply press a button and end it all painlessly, I probably would. So I know how the mind of a suicidal person is like.

BUT...

At the same time, suicide is a permanent thing, and you only get EXACTLY one life. So this is not something to toy around with.

Speaking for myself, if killing myself and dying is what truly makes me happy, that's my right! But at the same time, I imagine if someone existed who loved me, they'd be rather sad. And that would literally only maybe be my parents. 2 whole people on this whole planet.

I myself have talked to suicidal users from other websites. If killing themselves would make them happy, then I'm all for it, but at the same time I enjoy talking to them and don't wanna see them die forever.

So this is a tricky subject.

In the end though...would probably be best to tell someone, because this is a PERMANENT thing, and there is NO GOING BACK no matter what, whether you like it or not.

If it was me, I'd prefer for the other person to tell no one because this is my life, I wanna end it if I feel it's best for me...but at the same time, the other person might not wanna see me gone forever. So there's that.

Muthafukajones · 46-50, M

Yes! It’s a private confidence. I would keep it. Offer them any support I could to change their mind and let them know that they are valued and that their life matters and it’s important.

Maya15 · F

so the way this works is there are two situations.

1. they say the WILL commit suicide. that they are planning to do it. that means they want inpatient care -- everyone knows what happens if you say that. in that case you help them get it. try not to involve the police if possible though. and if they didn't know that it's an unreasonable burden for you to deal with.

2. anything else. of course you honor their request. it's not a sin to talk about suicide. if you can't handle it say so. otherwise they'll just be more isolated. they just lost a friend who betrayed their confidence. it's normal to think about suicide at some point in life. and talking about that isn't something that others should breach confidence on. it's that simple.

Katie01 · F

If that's truly what they wanted to do, I would support them 100% in that decision and even offer to help, because that's what friends are for

Picklebobble2 · 56-60, M

Nope.
That's manipulation from a so called 'friend' for the purposes of trying to make you indispensable to their whims 24/7.

Listen. Give advice if you think you can point them in the direction of third party, qualified help.
But make it clear your advice is not what they need.

plasticpants02 · 70-79, M

i did once in high school. i fiqured he was just upset over girlfriend. he showed me a bottle of pills he said he swallowed on way to school. i got called to office around 11:00 that morning and was told he was in hospital having his stomach pumped. nevrr again will i take that chance.

lonelyloner · 31-35, F

i honor that request as well as saving her/him by writing the fact to those who care about it

DeWayfarer · 61-69, M

Clarification is greatly needed on this.

It's a situational thing that few want to talk about. Yet terminal cases is one of the situations.

Would you have your friend suffer in tremendous pain, even though they would die anyway? 🤷🏻‍♂

Is that really friendship, to prevent it in such a case?

To me, you would have to be a sadists to prevent it. Not a friend.