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Back here, not the same

A month ago, I had a near death experience. So many things changed in my life and I lost a dear family member. I decided to make another account here, since I deleted my account last year due to some problems, just to say goodbye to a dear friend on here. Idk, I thought, I didnt want to leave this world without him knowing how valuable our friendship was to me.
I checked his profile and realized his mom has passed away and it really broke my heart bc I wasnt there for him...he might have needed a friend and I wasnt there... that made me feel really bad and guilty. I didnt msg him, Idk..maybe I thought he had enough to worry abt...
So now Im here, and maybe I share some thoughts and feelings...maybe SW makes me feel better, like it used to...

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LadyGrace ·

My deepest and sincerest condolences. I definitely think you should reach out to your friend. We can't assume that your friend doesn't need you even now. But don't do it if you're going to disappear on this person again. You can tell him what happened and if he's any friend at all he will understand. Friends do. And you never know. He might miss you just as much as you miss him and this might make for an even closer relationship. People change, things happen. Then they see what is really valuable in life. Just don't assume you'll make things worse for this person. Maybe they have no one, you don't know. Maybe communication lacked in your last relationship but now you might realize more, that it's important to stay in touch with good friends.

I would like to ask you one question if I may. What did you learn from your near-death experience? I would like to hear about it if you would pm me, if you don't mind sharing it with me. And maybe it will even make you feel better, but if you don't want to it's okay. I'm curious about these things, but if you need a friend, I'm here if need to talk. I do hope and pray that you are healing. It takes a while, so take good care of yourself. ❤ 🫂

Foxygirl32 · 31-35, F

@LadyGrace thank u for ur lovely words.
Actually its so complicated between me and him.
About that experience , I go to the therapist every week and it takes a lot of my energy talking abt it and all. Im sorry but I cant go through that again. Its hard. But thank u dear friend for offering to hear me out❤

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Foxygirl32 · 31-35, F

@silkydrawers I dont beleive in what u said. That ppl here cant be real friends. Actually they are.
Im so sorry for your loss and I can relate. I lost my cat years ago and since then a part of heart is missing. Its unbearable but u will heal and u will go on. Its just a phase. U can handle it, just like all your worst days... bless ya ❤‍🩹

LadyGrace ·

@silkydrawers I am so very sorry for you loss. That is the hardest thing to lose a pet. I pray God will comfort your heart and help you heal. I do believe we'll see our pets in heaven. I wrote a post about that one time here. I wish I knew what to say to help you feel better. I'm so sorry you're going through this. ❤🫂

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KingofBones1 · 46-50, M

Well that was a very sweet thing of you to do. I had the opposite experience with people I connected with whenever I needed them most they all disappeared from my life when my grandmother died when I was at my lowest and went to federal prison. Now I am back and speaking of near-death experiences I can talk to you about that sometime as well. I have been on death's doorstep seven times now whether it be almost being drowned by an entire ocean having the deadliest heart attack known to man aka the Widowmaker being shot stabbed or hit by a car or almost blown up by an incendiary device I have teetered Between Worlds a few times since my conception. I am glad that you are here and I wish you all the best in your return

Foxygirl32 · 31-35, F

@KingofBones1 thank you. Im sorry to hear abt ur turbulant past and I am sure whoever went through all those deadly events can manage the future far more easier than usual ppl. Wish u all best🤗

KingofBones1 · 46-50, M

@Foxygirl32 I really appreciate that thank you very much for the words of encouragement they are definitely much needed and I wish you all the best as well

Pheartmaster · 31-35, M

I had a near death experience too, it changes your outlook on life. things taste and feel different but you're also more appreciative towards little things like a breeze during a hot summers day. Maybe you should message him

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Pheartmaster · 31-35, M

@Foxygirl32 Atleast you'd have closure ?

Foxygirl32 · 31-35, F

@Pheartmaster yeah we did. I said goodbye to him.but u know, it was complicated

Pheartmaster · 31-35, M

@Foxygirl32 I've lost contact with friends for over 10 years. i took the first step to connect again and they were actually surprised since i went out my way to do so. they knew i tend to disappear for long times

WonderGirl · 41-45, F

In 2023, I was in the hospital. I didn't have my laptop or my phone. So for one month, I lost contact with my friends on the internet. When I got home and got back online, I found she had messaged me a few times while I was away. She had a drug problem with pain medications. I messaged her back a few times, but I got no response. Finally, a month later, her brother posted on her Facebook page that she had committed suicide, and I never got to talk to her. I felt horrible and still do to this day.

Foxygirl32 · 31-35, F

@WonderGirl Oh dear. That must have been tough...Im sorry for your experience.💓

WonderGirl · 41-45, F

@Foxygirl32 We were close internet friends. We lived in different parts of the country, but we would hang out almost every night and watch Netflix together, as well as other shows and movies. Many times, we would both fall asleep while on Skype and wake up the next morning still online. We were always there for each other.

Pretzel · 70-79, M

welcome back - I'm glad you survived and am sorry for your loss.

it's a tough life out there

sometimes you connect with a person or two and they come more real than the people you can physically see each daay

Foxygirl32 · 31-35, F

@Pretzel thats so true

SomeMichGuy · M

I hope you def. do find good things here.

samueltyler2 · 80-89, M

I hope you can emerge from this an get to enjoy a long, healthy and happy life.

Foxygirl32 · 31-35, F

@samueltyler2 thank u

samueltyler2 · 80-89, M

@Foxygirl32 I have lived a long life, with many ups and downs. I always hope that tomorrow is better than today b

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