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StillLearning

26-30, F

United States

Single

Asexual

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What’s wrong with me? [I Am Overweight And Cannot Stop Eating]

Have you ever eaten way too much and been so full your stomach is almost hard? But then about an hour later you’re ready for round two? That’s me right now and it’s disappointing. I’m disappointed for two reasons: 1) there isn’t anything to eat right...

I My Weight Is Skyrockettimg

I honestly just don’t know what to do anymore. I’ve almost just given up and accepted my fate, but I know nothing will ever change if I do that. I’ve gone out for a walk at least 3-4 times a week. I do little exercises while watching TV. I walk aroun...

I Have a Bad Feeling

I don’t know what it is, but for the past few days I’ve had this horrible feeling. I don’t know what it means. I don’t know why I have it. I don’t even know if anything is actually going to happened. But I had this overwhelming sense of needing to...

I am too fat, but I can’t stop eating. I’ve struggled with my mental health and weight as long as I can remember. But the urge to hurt myself went away every time I ate. So I kept eating. And now, I don’t want to do anything rash or hurt myself, but...

I Am Discovering A Newer Me Each Day

Recovery is a hell of a thing. I didn’t realize just how different I actually was from who I thought I was. Depression, anxiety, and insomnia dragged me far down the rabbit hole, but I am slowly crawling out. I’m learning more about myself with each...

I Am Trying to Find Happiness

I’m finally getting better at it. I’m getting better at looking at the little things and pushing aside a lot of the negativity. I still have bad days. Like this weekend was really bad. But it’s a work in progress and that’s what I keep reminding...

I Want People to Share Their Poetry

She works hard for the smile She jokes and she laughs Gives everyone everything Alone she sits at night Friends she only has in the day Shadows creeping in Wrapping their tendrils around her Pulling her back with them She stops smiling She stops...

I Am Mad, Sad, Disappointed

I'm mad at myself for not being more "successful." I'm mad at myself for having to move back into my mom's house. I'm mad at myself that I could have just gotten my BA degree and been done and had my dream job, but I had to make things difficult...

I Am Existing, Not Living

I go through each day. Sleep, eat, work, repeat. Sometimes I might socialize for an hour or two, but I never do the talking anymore. It used to be that I was out and about all the time. People were my dry of choice. Friends made the world go...

I Want People to Share Their Poetry

May temptation be brought to light Young life brought to pasture Someday left Undisturbed I lie awake deep within Calling out for silence Itching to be unseen Driven deep within this madness Euphoria at last

I Hate Bad News

I know it's a long read, but I have to tell someone. In 17 hours it will have been one year since I read an article that turned my world upside down, and then made a phone call that completely tore it to shreds. On December 17, 2017, my dad was...

I Battle Depression On My Own

I don't like to ask for help because a lot of the people around me have their own schedules, chores, and health that they need to tend to. I can't always be dependent on others to help me get done what I need to do, or to drop everything any time I...

I Dont Know Who I Am Anymore

My dad was always the drinker. Anything that happened warranted a drink. But he's been locked up for a year now, and I've noticed that my drinking is growing. I've never been legitimately, not all the way here, drunk. And I've never made myself...

I Battle Depression and Anxiety

It's been getting really bad lately. When I was little and I was anxious I would start rubbing my head and biting my knuckles. Now I scratch. I'm so used to my anxiety, though, that I don't even realize what's happening anymore until I look down...

I Want People to Share Their Poetry

A shell of who I once was Lost in a sea of possibilities So much to see, so much to do Its incredibly overwhelming So in any direction I can go Yet I'm stuck and lost Terrified of moving forward Petrified of going back I don't remember who I am...

I Fight Depression and Loneliness Everyday

It seems to feel like it's going to be a losing battle with my depression one of these days. I am seeing someone and I do have a prescription. And, despite my size and unbelievable it might be, I really do get out to walk around in the sun. Gotta...