I’m Leaving. For Real. This Time. Probably.Okay. I’m done. I’m actually leaving. I know some of you are already rolling your eyes. “Oh look, another dramatic exit.” WELL GUESS WHAT? Maybe I amdramatic. Maybe I am the problem. But maybe—just maybe—none of you ever appreciated me in the first p... See More »
SophieSmiles Is Not a Real Girl—She’s a Bloke and Probably a WerefrogAlright, I’m done watching everyone get duped by “SophieSmiles” like she’s some ethereal forest nymph with a ring light and a skincare routine. Let me break it to you gently: She’s not real. She’s a bloke. And quite possibly… a werefrog. Yeah, I... See More »
Birds Aren’t Real Was the Distraction—It’s TREES That Are the Real Surveillance SystemEveryone laughed at “Birds Aren’t Real.” Classic misdirection. While people were busy joking about robot pigeons, they missed the real threat: trees. Yes, trees. Those ancient, silent, all-seeing towers standing in every park, forest, and backyard.... See More »
I’m a Were-Frog and Someone Still Fell in Love With Me (??? HOW) 🐸❤🔪Full moon hits. I explode into frog. Not majestic. Not anime transformation. Just splat — skin goes inside out, bones liquefy, I scream in ribbits, land in a ditch full of rainwater and shame. Every. Single. Month. Do I hop? Yes. Against my will. Do... See More »
No One Takes My Struggle as a Were-Frog Seriously (And I'm Tired of It)Hey everyone, I’m not sure where else to vent, because every time I bring this up, people either laugh, roll their eyes, or tell me I’m "just quirky" or "looking for attention." So here it is, laid out as plainly as I can: I’m a were-frog. Yes,... See More »
Need more friends!Hello friends (future friends) I am in need of some entertainment, please message me the most crazy of messages 🙏 amen
Pineapple does go on pizza.Yes, Pineapple Goes on Pizza — And if you disagree you're Just Wrong. All of You. Even You, Italy. Let’s settle this once and for all: pineapple belongs on pizza. Not as a joke. Not as a “quirky” choice. As a legitimate, elite-tier topping. And if... See More »
Sid the sloth strugglesIt’s not easy waking up every day and realizing you bear an uncanny resemblance to Sid the Sloth from Ice Age. I smile in photos? Boom—instant Sid. I blink too slow? Sid. Allergies make my eyes puffy? Extra Sid. I try to look cute in selfies and som... See More »
Anyone else dealing with... unusual transformations? (Serious question)everyone, This is going to sound ridiculous, but I’m being serious. I need to talk about something strange that happens to me every full moon. It started a few months ago, and it’s been the same pattern ever since. I change. Physically. My skin... See More »
I believe I might be a were-frog. Anyone else? Poll (4) See Poll OptionsIt started on a full moon. One night, I felt weird — like my skin was too tight and my throat wanted to croak. Then it happened. My hands shrank, my... See More »
