How do you learn to accept your flaws and not let them eat you alive? I am going through some...

GerOttman · 61-69, M

I don't "accept" my flaws, I celebrate them. They are as much me as my right arm! I'm the only me that ever was or will ever be, therefore there's no one better than me...

Don't ever look down on yourself, you're the best!!

Magenta · F

By not seeing them as flaws, but by seeing them as being the wonderful human you are. It sounds too simple I know. But it's true. Sometimes when we view things as flaws, we are comparing that to perfection. Perfection is non existent.

Also.. please please do not compare yourself to people on social media, it is the biggest façade that exists.

in10RjFox · M

Idle mind is a a devil's workshop. So look for some occupancy to engage your mind instead of constantly looking and evaluating yourself.

Start attending to others and involve with them and soon you will forget about yourself and your adversities will vanish on its own over time. Reason why they say time heals.

SStarfish ·

Because you are more than your looks and your physical shape.. society is superficial but there's more to life than looks and once you get past that nobody really cares anyway .. you need to refocus .. i mean it's nice to be fit and all but weight issues are more about a life balance of burning calories.. you can burn a lot just by walking.. i was 80 lbs lighter when i used to walk laps verses now when i sit around eating out of boredom you know? You just have to accept reality or change your habits.. that's all.. it's a struggle for some who just want to sit around eating and yet want to be slim.. because that's not how it works.. anyway good luck 🙂

Morvoren · F

For me sometimes my insecurities are forgotten entirely, and then on other occasions they completely overwhelm me. It seems to be a cycle I go through.

I’d love to give you helpful advice, but I haven’t mastered it myself.

MarbleMarvel

I got good with who I was inside. I stopped caring what people might think when they look at me. Some people judge, some people don't, it's not up to me to make someone happy with who I am.

It's difficult and it takes time. It also kinda happens naturally as you age. Because of media and advertising, especially for women, we believe there are high standards. But if you look around, no body is perfect. Nobody stays perfect either, so there's no need to compare.

Focus on who you want to be, not how you look. And make sure you aren't judging others by appearance too. I was guilty of that for a time and realized I was only making it worse for myself.

Be well 🖤

Coralmist · 41-45, F

I have a bully inner critic too. Alwaysssdss saying, You're not as good as them, as pretty, as this as that....and endless worries of how I'm less. The root is, I had extreme trauma and abuse daily for many, many years. So my narcissist parent made me believe I'm not only unworthy of any goodness, because anything that wasn't the focus on THEM made them seethe... But I was DEFECTIVE just in living. It has felt Awful as an adult to still believe this over time. I have PTSD and don't date, and Dont have a job currently due to it. I'm not saying you have PTSD too, but the worries are really similar to mine.
I'm in therapy now but it's 50/50 on if things are clicking. I do hope they can help me find a way to start a new Self. I'm reading a book called Complex PTSD, FROM SURVIVING TO THRIVING. by Pete Walker. So far it is very good ....he says we often have an inner bully noticing every inconceivable 'flaw' and magnifying all we think is wrong about us. That we need to yell at it, and SHUT it down. Say" I don't ever need to be perfect. No one is. I can be a human, in all its traits. I will and can make mistakes too." Etc etc. I really enjoy the book so far. My other therapists barely said any of these affirmations to me or dug into how to reverse this. Hope this helped even a bit...you are good just as you are NOW. THAT IS TRUTH. 🌸🪻🙂

IM5688 · 61-69, M

You learn to accept your flaws by not thinking of them as flaws. Stop comparing yourself to others. You need to accept you the way you are. Think of yourself as being unique, you're not like anyone else. You're special and perfect just the way God made you to be.

Royricky09

https://similarworlds.com/social/5163578-Do-you-post-your-life-on-Facebook-Instagram

Read this carefully and understand.

boklenholley7 · F

I really recommend reading the 5 thieves of happiness. It completely changed my perspective.

twistedrope · 26-30, M

You could get a seperate therapist. You could also try the book "What happened to you?" by dr Bruce Perry which looks at the way the brain works for these things.

I personally don't compare myself to other people. No one else has this body but me and I got it with all its flaws. I guess that sort of "Not wanting to feel so awful" can really be remedied by being validated by someone you trust. i think that's a great way.

AngelUnforgiven · 46-50, F

Truthfully i feel like anything that i say to you won't matter. Because your mind is just stuck in a place of self loathing. I understand that you don't want to seek counseling due to a bad experience, maybe you should see another doctor then, someone different that you can trust. But you need some help! And i really hope that you get it.

pdockal · 56-60, M

Hmmmmmm

Not all therapists are a good fit so find one that is

Most body issues can be changed thru diet & exercise (not knowing exactly what yours are)

Nobody is perfect so you will never be able to achieve that & once you understand that you'll start to feel better

Talking helps but you need to find the right person to talk with

Kstrong · 56-60, F

You are alive! Breathing, walking, eating..... be grateful, be unique.... people look and compare themselves to you.... count your blessings.... your focus is on the negative, change your focus and your attitude...

nevergiveup · M

Even at my age living with all my insecuritys i still have bad days.

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