Upset
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Caretosharedeeply · 26-30, F
You definitely deserve much better than a group of friends who make you appear as the villain when the truth is that you were the one who was wronged.

Sounds like you are changing and possibly they feel the shift and have a hard time accepting your growth. Maybe pull back and start learning more about yourself. I'm going through a similar thing and it hurts. Maybe you're being protected even though it might not feel like it. I've been battling this for a year or so now. But recently I've been meeting new people who align with my values. Try to let it go and find what aligns with your spirit.
@Bittersweet84 I went through this with my husband's sister and it hurt, but I decided to let go and forge on. Be resilient. Persevere. Try to become the best you that you can be. Embrace the solitude for a little while and spend time realigning with what is true to you.
Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
@PromiseProtectionProvision Thank you. This comment is very helpful and validated.💙
@Bittersweet84 You're welcome 💛
CuTiePi · F
Sounds like they are sticking pins in your eyes & when you stick up for yourself they act like they are victim's. Move on join another group local to your area. You could maybe keep contact with the one that seemed to understand but she may be loyal to the other one. So sorry you had to experience the isolation and feel rejection. Not nice people to call friends x
Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
@CuTiePi Yes, I know. Well, lesson learned, don't pour too much energy and time for a friend. I'm beginning to move on now. I just needed to vent here.👏🏻
CuTiePi · F
@Bittersweet84 Best place to vent 👌
Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
@CuTiePi Thank you💙
Mk8155 · M
It has happened to many of us. There are things out of our control and it’s best not to sorry about what we can’t change, you told your friends how you felt. If they care they will come back to you
Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
@Mk8155 Obviously they don't care. But life is sometimes unfair. I'll focus spending time with my family.
Deserthiker · 61-69, M
Yes!!! You deserve better and will find real friends. If they reach out , be cordial, just remember and don’t confide in them any more.
I’m sorry to hear you were hurt
Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
@Deserthiker I will do, I will just be cordial and will never say anything more. I will distant myself, from now on. 👏🏻💙
Deserthiker · 61-69, M
@Bittersweet84 I’ve been let down by most of my ‘friends’ all my life. Down to a very select few.
Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
@Deserthiker Thank you. It's nice to know that someone experienced the same thing.👏🏻💙
Jenny1234 · 56-60, F
I’m sorry they treated you that way. Why wouldn’t they have just invited you? I can’t stand when people exclude friends like that.
Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
@Jenny1234 It could have been a lot better if I did not attend the bday night out. I dedicated my time and effort for her as I was the one who organized the event for the birthday celebrant.. Well lesson learned, never again!
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It's always better to cool down, sometimes people need space and adjustments. Maybe in future they will call you again. If not , don't think that something is wrong with you, just accept it and move on..
Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
@littlepuppywantanewlife Yes, gradually doing it now.
AngelUnforgiven · 51-55, F
Read the room and move on. Real friends don't do things like that. I wouldn't want to be associated with people like that.
Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
@AngelUnforgiven I know, I should have not bothered doing things for her. I'll try to move on and keeping my mind occupied. Thank you.💙
Jayciedubb · 56-60, M
Give it some time. Don't burn any bridges over it. I know it sucks getting ditched, but people who are able to do such things already don't have a problem with it. No matter how much you drive your point home, they will resist and still see you at fault.

Just give it time and it will work itself out for the better.
Unfortunately there is always a ringleader and the others are usually scared of doing anything that would upset the balance.

Its so sad that they cant be independent individuals and have a voice x
@Bittersweet84 its so sad but it happens. You are probably better off without them and the upset that it brings x
Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
@jackjones68 This woman Geraldine (she's 51 yrs old) can't decide about anything by herself, and she has a close friend named Joyce, who manipulates her, in short, she has an enabler friend, who dictates everything to her.
@Bittersweet84 i think Joyce is a bully who knows exactly how to pull the strings. And she probably doesn't have a lot going on in her life and wants to put that unhappiness on others x
LordShadowfire · 46-50, M
Here's what I would do. Don't necessarily say goodbye to them, but do stop hanging out with them for a while. If any of them are the types who call you to invite you to do stuff with the group, just casually decline, say you're busy. If you're the one who has to do the inviting, well, I think we know what's going to happen next.

Eventually, after you turn down a couple of invitations to hang, they'll either get the message that you're upset and try to make things right, or they won't. That will tell you whether these people are worthy of being your friends.
Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
@LordShadowfire I should just keep my distance and just trust the process.💙
LordShadowfire · 46-50, M
@Bittersweet84 Exactly. They'll show their true colors soon enough.
Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
I'm jst going to trust the process.
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Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
@Royricky09 It's originally the 51st birthday night out of Geraldin (I'm clearly invited in this specific night out, as I was the one who organized the night out.. Then, when I got there, most of them made another plan of going to another night out (it's bday celebration of my ex-friend) in which I wasn't aware of. They just suddenly planned it right there and then. It's actually really hurtful.
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I would move on without them. No one needs people like that in their lives.
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@Bittersweet84 No, it wasn't stupid to cry. I did too. It hurts and I feel it's important to express ourselves and grieve. It's healthy. Although, don't dwell on it for long.
Northwest · M
For whatever reason, you're the fifth wheel.Move on, develop, or join another group of friends.
Musicman · 61-69, M
If these are friends you have had for a while I would put it behind you and give them another chance. Letting one bad evening ruin a long friendship is a bad idea.
could it be your age difference.
Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
@jackrabbit10 I'm the youngest in the group. I'm 40, they're about early 50's and late 50's. I don't know if that's the reason. If it is, it's very shallow and evil.
@Bittersweet84 could be your so called friends have plan's you may not fit in to,
Bittersweet84 · 36-40, F
@jackrabbit10 They made plans that I wasn't aware of, unfortunately. Don't worry I could get through this. 💙
why a group, just mingle with every one,
Convivial · 26-30, F
Walk away with your head held high... You can do better than that ;)
Massageman · 70-79, M
Live in day-tight compartments. Peale, Carnegie.
Familygirl · 46-50, F
With friends like them, u dont need enemies

 
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