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Rusham

New Zealand

Discussion, Private Chat, Friends, Advice, Help, Support, Stories, Learning, Look Around, Role Play

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11654 views · 183 followers · Joined: April 10, 2016 · Online: See Last Online »

Happy and caring. I enjoy chatting, humor, making friends and a love of disc golf

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WHY GOD MADE MUMS

Answers given by 2nd year school children to the following questions: Why did God make mothers? 1. She's the only one who knows where the selotape is. 2. Mostly to clean the house. 3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.... See More »

A young boy named Donald

comes running down the street looking for a cop. He finds one and begs, “Please, officer, come back to the bar with me—my father’s in a fight.” When they get back to the bar, three guys are fighting like you wouldn’t believe. After a while, the cop... See More »

One evening a family brings their frail, elderly mother

to a nursing home and leaves her, hoping she will be well cared for. The next morning, the nurses bathe her, feed her a tasty breakfast, and set her in a chair at a window overlooking a lovely flower garden. She seems fine, but after awhile she... See More »

Old but worthy of another read

Grandma is eighty-eight years old and still drives her own car. She writes: Dear Granddaughter, The other day I went up to our local Christian book store and saw a 'Honk if you love Jesus' bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that... See More »

Suddenly the engine splutters

Four people are aboard a small airplane cruising thousands of feet above the ground: • The Pilot (because, of course, someone has to fly the plane). • The President of the United States (a man of great importance—or so he claims). • The World’s... See More »

A nun sits and chats with Mother Superior

A nun is sitting with her Mother Superior, chatting. “I used some horrible language this week, and I feel absolutely terrible about it.” “When did you use this awful language?” asks the elder. “Well, I was golfing and hit an incredible drive that... See More »

Blwyddyn Newydd Dda

And I’m not pissed, just sending love. Sincerely Myfanwy

They met on a singles cruise.

Ed and Linda met on a singles cruise, and from the moment Ed laid eyes on her during the midnight countdown, he was smitten. When they discovered they lived in the same city, just miles apart, Ed could hardly believe his luck. As soon as they... See More »

This joke I gave a 10/10. Lmao

When I was a child, my father cheated and didn't love my family. Later, my parents divorced. Soon my mother died in a car accident. My brother and I could only live in my grandma's old house. The whole family lived on my grandma's savings. Later my... See More »

What is possibly the most helpful advice a doctor has given you?

For me it happened when I saw my doctor during Covid and told him about my leaking eyes. The tears were being a nuisance running down my cheeks under my mask. His advice was to use cotton pads soaked in a solution of Johnson’s Baby Shampoo and... See More »

Here is a fun fact for all THE Hobbit and Lord Of the Rings fans

Bilbo Baggins had to be a male for the plot of *The Hobbit* to work. If Bilbo were female, everything would have fallen apart in the goblin cave. Bilbo would have wandered around the dark and dreary caverns, found the ring, and seen Gollum fishing,... See More »

Whoops…… Really.

“Do you really have to lick the knife?” She asked, her tone sharp and cutting. “Force of habit!” I said with a grin, wiping it theatrically. “Come on, lots of people do it.” She rolled her eyes, exasperated. Her eyes narrowed. “Yes,” she finally... See More »

Truly lovely thoughts

The first day of university, our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn’t already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder. I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady... See More »

Oh, to be 8 again!

A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching his wife, who was looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off he asked what she'd like to have for her birthday. 'I'd like to be eight again', she replied, still looking in... See More »

Don’t Talk to the Parrot

Wanda's dishwasher quit working so she called in a repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, 'I'll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, Leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you a cheque.' Oh,... See More »

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Can you add one of your own to these?

Q1. In which battle did Napoleon die? * his last battle Q2. Where was the Declaration of Independence signed? * at the bottom of the page Q3. River Ravi flows in which state? * liquid Q4. What is the main reason for divorce? * marriage... See More »

Senior Wedding Registry

Jacob, a spry 92, and his sweetheart Rebecca, a lively 89, are bubbling with excitement about their upcoming wedding in sunny Miami. As they stroll down the street, hand in hand, chatting about the big day, they pass a drugstore. Jacob’s eyes light u... See More »

One of my favourites.

You just have to appreciate this one. Young people forget that we old people had a career before we retired. Charley, a new retiree-greeter at Wal-Mart, just couldn't seem to get to work on time. Every day he was 5, 10, 15 minutes late. But he... See More »

Critical Thinking At Its Very Best!??

Woman: Do you drink beer? Man: Yes. Woman: How many beers a day? Man: Usually about 3. Woman: How much do you pay per beer? Man: $5.00 which includes a tip (This is where it gets scary!). Woman: And how long have you been drinking? Man: Oh,... See More »

Halloween……………

Dad buys his son a halloween costume Dad, can I take the price tag off now? It's really annoying.. No, keep it until we get home so we can really scare mom.

Amazon weather report

While preparing to build a highway deep in the Amazon rainforest, a group of engineers was surprised by an unexpected visitor—a local native. He approached them and calmly warned that heavy rain would arrive in two hours, urging them to take... See More »

A handful of 7 year old children were asked what they thought of beer. There were some interesting responses, but the last one is especially touching.

'I think beer must be good. My dad says the more beer he drinks the prettier my mum gets.' --Tim, 7 years old. 'Beer makes my dad sleepy and we get to watch what we want on television when he is asleep, so beer is nice.' --Melanie, 7 years... See More »

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Whoops. Funny

One night, I went into a piano bar to have a drink with friends. When I glanced at the pianist, something seemed off, but I couldn’t figure out what. Not wanting to stare, I looked again a few minutes later and realised what was wrong. I knew I... See More »

Shopping at Tiffany’s

A lady walks into Tiffany’s, looks around, spots a beautiful diamond necklace and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to look more closely at it, she unexpectedly farts. Very embarrassed she looks around nervously to see if anyone noticed... See More »

What a great explanation

A young girl, who was writing a paper for school, came to her father and asked, “Dad, what is the difference between anger and exasperation?” The father replied, “It’s mostly a matter of degree. Let me show you what I mean.” With that, the father... See More »

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