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M
New Zealand
Discussion, Friends, Support, Stories, Learning, Role Play
5476 views · 135 followers · Joined: April 10, 2016 · Online: Recently (date?)
Happy and caring by nature. I enjoy chatting with people with a sense of humor and open minds
About Me
Join Time
1st Week of SW
Days Active
2 Yrs Active
Stories
1000 Stories
Groups
100 Groups
 
SW User
I Love Jokes And Riddles
A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper, Guido, has cheated him out of $10,000,000. His bookkeeper is deaf. That was the reason he got the job in the first place. It was assumed that Guido would hear nothing and would therefore never have to...
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M
4
3 replies
9 views
2 days ago
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
CHURCH SERVICES of THE FUTURE PASTOR: "Praise the Lord!" CONGREGATION: "Hallelujah!" PASTOR: "Will everyone please turn on their Tablet, PC, IPad, Smart phone, And Kindle Bibles To 1 Cor 13:13. ...
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M
2
0 replies
6 views
3 days ago
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I Like a Good Quote
A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.'' (George Bernard Shaw)
M
5
3 replies
2 views
4 days ago
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
Something to do to keep those grey cells active! 1. Johnny's mother had three children. The first child was named April. The second child was named May ...... What was the third child's name? 2. There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is...
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M
2
3 replies
12 views
4 days ago
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Has anyone else experienced bacon spitting itself out of the frying pan and onto the floor?
It is a first for me and it cracked me up laughing.
M
1
3 replies
4 views
Apr 13, 2019
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Embarrassing & Funny
I Love Jokes And Riddles
The foreman of an Irish road crew employed Paddy to paint the white lines line down the middle of the road.. He told Paddy that he should paint two miles of road in a day's work. After the first day, the foreman was pleased to find that he...
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M
6
2 replies
14 views
Apr 12, 2019
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
My neighbour was working in his yard when he was startled by a late model car that came crashing through his hedge and ended up in his front lawn. He rushed to help an elderly lady driver out of the car and sat her down on a lawn chair. He said with ...
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M
3
0 replies
12 views
Apr 9, 2019
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
One evening, after the honeymoon, Tom was welding some stuff in the garage for fun. His new wife was standing there by the bench watching him. After a long period of silence she finally said, "Honey, I've just been thinking, now that we ...
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M
1
0 replies
6 views
Apr 4, 2019
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
The teacher sees that Johnny isn't paying attention in class, so she asks him, "If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?" Johnny answers, "None." The teacher asks, "Why?" ...
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M
2
0 replies
9 views
Apr 3, 2019
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
Little Johnny is constantly late for school and what's worse is that he always has a big lie explaining why. The teacher tells the principal that she has had it with his exaggerations. The principal tells her to send Johnny to him the next tim...
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M
1
0 replies
12 views
Apr 2, 2019
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
One of my all time favourite clean jokes. A cat died and went to Heaven. God met her at the gates and said, "You have been a good cat all these years. Anything you want is yours for the asking." The cat thought for a minute and then sa...
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M
4
2 replies
14 views
Mar 31, 2019
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
I was at the bar the other night and overheard three very hefty women talking at the bar. Their accent appeared to be Scottish, so I approached and asked, "Hello, are you three lassies from Scotland ?" One of them angrily screeched, ...
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M
2
0 replies
14 views
Mar 30, 2019
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: 'Slim, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age. How do you ...
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M
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0 replies
12 views
Mar 29, 2019
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
Four guys have been going to the same fishing trip for many years. Two days before the group is to leave, Ron's wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn't going. Ron's mates are very upset that he can't go, but what can they d...
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M
6
1 reply
13 views
Mar 28, 2019
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
*** POOF *** And... *** POOF *** An old lady sits on her front porch, rocking away the last days of her long life, when all of a sudden, a fairy godmother appears and informs her that she will be granted three wishes. ''Well, now,'...
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M
5
2 replies
20 views
Mar 25, 2019
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
A baby turtle was standing at the bottom of a large tree and with a deep sigh, started to climb. About an hour later, he reached a very high branch and walked along to the end. He turned and spread all four flippers and launched himself off the branc...
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M
3
0 replies
13 views
Mar 24, 2019
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
Mary's fourth grade homework assignment was to make sentences using the words in her spelling list, along with the definition. Coming across the word "frugal" in the list, she asked her father what it meant. He explained that being fru...
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M
1
0 replies
20 views
Mar 19, 2019
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
One day a redhead, a brunette, and a blonde were on their way to heaven. God told them the stairs to heaven were 1,000 steps and on every step he was going to tell them a joke. If they laughed they would not be able to get to heaven. So the redhead...
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M
1
1 reply
23 views
Mar 18, 2019
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I Like a Good Quote
I think I found this quote here on SW It is too good not to be shared again so She dressed herself in confidence everyday and refused to wear anybody else's insecurities...a.j. lawless
M
2
0 replies
5 views
Mar 17, 2019
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I Love Jokes And Riddles
An Irishman goes to the doctor, who after examining him says “You have some problems with your heart, but if you take these tablets, I think it will be okay. “So the doctor gives the man the tablets and the patient asks, “Do I have to take them ev...
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M
5
1 reply
23 views
Mar 17, 2019
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