if you're a man, how can you hide 'desperation'

If you meet someone in the right circumstances then its best to keep it to small talk at first. Dont just throw your whole life out there. Find out their interests if you can and you.ll kind of know just by that alone if its a person for you. Visa versa too. You.ll be surprised how many people struggle. Sometimes you may well attract similar. I have had lots of GFs in my youth and married for 25 years.

First thought?…. Be yourself.
In the initial dates with someone, just enjoy their company. Listen, offer a light response if you want.
Go places that you both can talk about what you’re seeing—maybe museums, art, whatever.
A little time and then you can share, slowly—your deeper feelings.
Actually, not much different than good ole fashioned dating ;0)

just be honest. dont be afraid to be yourself and speak your truth. if you cant be yourself then what kind of relationship would you have anyway? women are used to guys being super horny so i wouldnt worry about it.

eta- be honest but try to keep details to a minimum unless asked specifically and dont try to make yourself look bad

if you live in or near an area where prostitution is legal, you might consider seeking out some "coaching" to help you work through your anxiety.