Single life....and no, not looking.

After my divorce, I was in the same situation. I had a few FWB just to have some companionship and physical connection. That helped me with some of the healing I needed to do, especially with my damaged ego. Helped me bridge the gap.

It took me a long time, in fact, I’m still working on it. Surround yourself with good people who will help you to trust again. Take care of you, the first step is learning to trust yourself again. You will want to traverse those walls when you find someone safe to do it with. Be kind to yourself. Use the situation as a learning experience to know yourself, what you want, what you don’t want.

[quote]how do you start[/quote]

One step at a time. Some people make the mistake of instantly jumping into a relationship, to relieve the pain of loneliness, emotional, and physical, but they rarely ever succeed. Don't get into anything serious, for at least a year, and don't jump into situations you may regret a year down the road.

Most importantly, don't involve your kids, no matter how tempting it might be, into your love life, until you've been in an actual relationship for a year. Nothing worse than subjecting them to a revolving door.

I’m the same, find it hard to let anyone in my life now. I do know what you’re going through 🥰✨

It's very simple just look at it as the final chapter of a book you finished reading, pick up another book and start a whole new story, it only gets hard when we hang on to old feelings, these chapters in your life will always be with you but it doesn't mean you have to keep reliving them, remember time is short don't waste it or as someone once said "don't waste your time always searching for those wasted years"

My wife died after having a massive stroke. We were married for 35 years. Trying to adjust to this shock in my life

[i][/i]The same way you did the first time , the rules haven’t changed . You are going to be much more cautious because of your kids primarily and because the last one didn’t work out . “Divorcée mother” ! A term that scares a lot of men . The flakes will stay away and if you’ve attracted the right sort he is going to know exactly what the situation is . Friendly conversation and dinner is a great start after you’ve gotten to know them . Being in a hurry is exactly where most relationships go wrong and the good ones understand that . The second time around you don’t [b][i]make[/i][/b] the magic, you [b][i]find[/i][/b] it. 😉

Yeah. I gave up and luckily didn't bring any children into this world to be treated that way either.

Your guard is up and that's normal to be cautious and will you ever feel the same way you did when you feel in love last time is most likely the feeling you'll have. But with time and patience there is someone out there thinking the exact same thing you are. It just takes as long as it takes 6 days 6 weeks 6 months 6 years etc.

I was in a similar situation at around the same age. I really enjoyed dating, casually. I had a few FWB for companship and other obvious reasons.
It was working well, but after some time it felt like something was missing. That's when I realized that maybe it was time to open myself to more.

Baby steps...regain your sense of you

I know how you feel...I came out of an 18 year marriage. I did no dating, no flirting, no nothing for a whole year...worked for me. Only then was i ready with no baggage for a bew relationship.
Take your time...the walls do come down....they dont have to get higher.

I know your struggle; I have been single 15 plus years with kids raised and out of my house. I have no clue where to begin or to even try other than just being 100% authentic to myself, and just let whatever is to unfold to unfold.

Just befriend someone and build and trust each other with time create a new bond with a friend talk about anything and everything open and with each other and it will naturally develop.

I say the same thing every time I look at my situation. First thing would be make sure my kids are ok and after that I’d just need to spend time on me for a while.

Why are you asking advice about trust when you trust no one? No matter what they say you won't trust them, right?

Been there. Divorced in '97. Not remarried but I have a couple close friends. Best that one learns how to.live.

Just relax and enjoy the moments. Have some fun. Be casual. Do not worry.

I can relate

Takes different amounts of time with each person..I guess when you're fully at ease with yourself once again.Then maybe opportunities may present themselves to you