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Does it really get better or worst?

I wonder what victims of abuse did once they got away .my abusive ex will be getting out in a year and I’m a bit nervous because I know I will always be paying attention, having anxiety everywhere I go .I feel like ny bd will try to get revenge so I know from now on out , I have to carry something on me, I would rather leave ny but I’m waiting trying to research if I should move a city over but what worries is me is that people can find out where u live just by researching your name to google and it will give an address as well, i even thought of changing my name and go to a gun state, I know these things take time but I wanna be readying. It’s so much on my mind
riseofthemachine · 41-45, M Best Comment
I went threw a lot in my life .
My experience is if you run you'll run for the rest of your life , and going to different states like when i had anxiety before and was thinking of moving to a different country (the other side of the world i went) and a friend of mine said i wasn't ready and i ignored him and he said to me if you move you also bring your head with you , so the problem be there as well .
He was right . I came back where im from after 4 days and got a nervous breakdown over where i went - lost 3500 grand over there (the money didn't bother me) but the after shock of it landed me in a pysche ward for 6 weeks .
moongoddessx · 26-30, F
@riseofthemachine yes iv thought of that, I’m so sorry for your situation and thank you for sharing your experience, I hate that ppl have to go through this issue with phycotic ppl hurting us and stalking us. I hope you are in a better state of mind

AlchemyFox · 36-40, F
This shit pisses me off.

I had a man attack me at my home, complete psycho. I didn’t want to date him because he was an abusive, alcoholic jerk so he waited for me. He hid until I got off of work, luckily I just saw the sunset glinting off his taillight and he had been threatening me all day. I call the police and they come get him, but are like, dicks to me. Telling me not to talk to men like him. It’s my own fault, all this crap. I ask what to do to stay safe, they say, move.

Why do we have to uproot our whole lives for these bastards?? Isn’t that giving them the power?

I just stay scary now. I have weapons coming out of my ears. I don’t even try with people anymore.

Abusers always win unless they’re locked up or dead.
moongoddessx · 26-30, F
@AlchemyFox omg I felt this so much , it’s constant fear because these asses can’t move on , I hate to think that way as well , feeling imma have to get up and leave .. I do feel like they do have power but then again they are just wasting thier days harrassing females. It’s about if they ever give up sadly my ex was arrested 20 times this year and I finally got balls to keep him in jail .. idk lol fuck my poor decision .
This is something that makes me uneasy, very uncomfortable. I live in an old apartment building. It's mostly quiet, almost all the time, with some predictable nuisance in noise. When does one decide to intervene?

I remember, one night, where I could feel the walls being banged, abused, even heard the expression from the man, 'if you didn't have such a lousy landlord, you'd have a working lock, so I could not hurt you.' Which really sums up, well, how abusive some can become. That night, I had 911 on dial, but I waited and waited, wanting her to call. As if I did, I'd never know how it would be responded upon. She might have denied all abuse. So I chose, wait, be conscious, be alert, be aware,

Eventually he left, she came out after, they had confrontation again, and I just kept flicking my lamp on and off; so he would know someone was watching. The police finally showed up. I didn't call, and I must assume she had before.

If you feel you have an abusive partner, all I can say is leave.
moongoddessx · 26-30, F
@thewindupbirdchronicles @thewindupbirdchronicles omg that is so unsettling , Jesus Christ.. I hope your okay.. I did leave I’m just wondering how I can disappear from this person because they are dangerous
@moongoddessx It's years ago, I can only contribute in observation, that night was the end of all abusive and dangerous behaviour. She held the key to the apartment, phoned the police, and they did show up, I watched the whole encounter. I felt a kind of calm and quietness watching him being taken away. I saw him months later, picking up mail, despite his abusive tendencies which belong somewhere else, I did make a note of asking, what are you doing here?

If he is that dangerous, please call police.
Convivial · 26-30, F
Maybe learn some relaxation exercise to steady the mind?
moongoddessx · 26-30, F
@Convivial I should , I suffer from anxiety , it’s even hard to have the patience for it especially when you’re not comfortable in your environment. I mean my apt is okay I just have so many bad memories here
Convivial · 26-30, F
@moongoddessx there's nothing wrong with seeking help when you need it... We all need some hand holding at times in the dark places... Hugs
moongoddessx · 26-30, F
@Convivial god bless you and thank you 🙏 I believe with prayer you shall receive when you work through god , everything manifests from there

 
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