Why am I crying over a dirt bag?

I know some young women who are healing from an abusive relationship with their father (who is now in prison.)

I was struck by the statement one of them made on Facebook, about how she could acknowledge positive times with him, and how that complicated the process of healing from the abuse.

As for realizing that the person you miss never existed, I have been through that myself. What helped me was to think back on interactions that I thought were so positive, and realize the extent to which I was projecting expectation onto the other, and the extent to which I was trying to interpret things more positively than they were. It was painful, but it was helpful.

I know a thing or two about feeling for someone who doesn’t treat you right. I’m sorry you’re struggling with it too. 🫂

I think sometimes what makes us hurt after a bad relationship is we had a picture in our mind of what we thought this person would be like and how the relationship would go. When they're gone, we're still holding on to the dream we had of them and what could have been and it confuses the issue of our feelings for them and cgetting over them. (imho)

The one blessing about mistakes is that you can learn from them. It's unfortunate that it's often such a painful process. I hope what you learned helps you to find happiness in the future.

I have totally been there with the hurt feelings after loosing someone, so I feel you girl!

Think of it the way I did...

[media=https://youtu.be/YpJAmlnBxoA]

You're feeling all of it bc its like they died. You're mourning that end of that relationship. Give it time and itll be a memory your mind / body wont react to nearly the same.

Went through it with my ex. She was a mental abuser of the worst kind, took me a long time till I was ready to properly care about anyone. I had to heal first amd find "me" if that makes sense.

One of the most difficult things about breaking up with someone is sometimes realizing that the person you were in love with was an idealization in your mind, not necessarily the actual person, but that the loss of that idealization is just as painful as if it were real. Losing the person means losing the possibility of ever realizing that idealized version of them that you were in love.

It's a legitimate loss, and you have to allow yourself to feel what you feel for as long as you need.

I feel you and I have been there. It's more about the wound they inflict than actually wanting some crusty pos that is beneath us. I send you healing light. 🤍🤍🤍🤍

It's a weird thing, grief. When I am not depressed, I feel very over my ex fiance. When I run out of my medicine and the depression comes back full force, then I miss her. It's completely f***ed and I am beyond tired of it all.

This feeling is the worst, been there myself a few times. You are stronger than any obstacle. I’m here if you need anything hun

Think of it as an addiction because that's essentially what it is. You're having cravings but don't let them take over.

i saw this literally right after your post and felt like i should share 🙏

I think every relationship ending brings more confusion then answers no matter how necessary the ending was.

Grieving over a dream that will never come to pass. Mourning the loss not only of who you desperately wanted that person to be but of the coveted role you yourself will never get to play out.

It’s bc you long to be seen and heard

Hugs

And I thought you were single

Just forget about her and move on. No woman deserves to make you suffer! There's PLENTY of fish in the sea!

Cause love hurts.