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Do you feel that you have to agree with people to be liked?

I always feel like that. That simply expressing a contrary, opposing view is like violence to some people. I can understand it, somewhat, with issues like abortion, religion, politics but even very simple things. Will there ever be a time when people appreciate discussion and learning new things instead of attacking because they feel the need to be 'right'? We can learn from each other. I feel like I'm always walking on egg-shells, apologizing and trying to explain that by disagreeing, I'm not attacking them.

One personal example where I learned from someone online is when a woman, on Twitter, told me Andrew Tate wrote and did some terrible things (prior to his arrest). I had seen an interesting video he posted, I wrote briefly about that and a woman claimed he wrote, and did, awful things. I thought she was just spouting off BS, so I asked for evidence. I looked it up, she was correct. I changed my mind about him.

I'm not here to argue about him, don't care if you love him, I'm just stating an example of how people can and do change their minds. You don't have to attack people, if you don't like their opinion. Find out why they hold that opinion. Sometimes an opinion is held for hateful reasons - racism, sexism etc. and people will side with someone who says similar things to what they feel but you know at the core, their opinion is based on hatred, not evidence.
Colonelmustardseed · 36-40 Best Comment
No one really likes a “yes man.” You can’t be truly liked for agreeing. I don’t argue with others anymore though. I rarely state my opinion with people I don’t know because I find that most really just want to express their own opinions. They want to be heard, and they take disagreement as not being heard out. So I practice my listening skills.
@Queendragonfly Most definitely. Some have narcissistic tendencies 😂 i.e. complete self-abortion, lack of empathy, unable to see things from another's point of view, selfishness.
@Queendragonfly That’s not genuine though. They like the boost to their egos; not the person.
@Colonelmustardseed

If we could just solve this problem, the world would be such a better place! 😂 It would heal. It's such a very fine balance in each person. Some can only tear down others to feel secure. I do think it's great to build people up but then you also encounter the problem of them taking that praise and building their egos up to the point they're tearing others down. It's frustrating as hell. I guess focus on the people that you think are worth the effort?

Henal · 26-30, F
No. I am more than willing to listen and discuss other people’s opinions, but I won’t agree with them on the basis of wanting to be liked. I'll agree with them only if that's what I really believe, otherwise I'll accept the difference of opinion and move on.
@Henal Yeah, exactly. I've found throughout time that if you go up again misogynistic jerks who directly say misogynistic hateful things about women, you simply can't say what you really think as you'll get a gang of hateful, angry men reporting you for pointing out truth (like violence stats).
Henal · 26-30, F
@Angelwarfare That’s one of the flaws of this site and its members.
@Henal Yeah, it pretty true everywhere.
Queendragonfly · 31-35, F
[i]"I'm only responsible for what I intend with what I say and do not for what you choose to understand or accept"
[/i]

I see it like people who can't respectfully disagree, are simply not my type of people. I don't feel good around people who's ego is so fragile that they must be "right" or they must insult someone due to lack of acceptance.

I know my opinions. I have no issue with changing my stances if I find someone to have a better argument, and I don't care who has that argument since to me it was never a competition to begin with.

I want the objective truth or as close to the objective truth as possible. In order for that to happen two people with two different perspectives must both be equally respected to create an as open minded discourse as possible.

It's simple. Don't fear others opinions. Just avoid engaging whenever someone starts with insults.
@Queendragonfly

I certainly don't fear opinions. I fear men with power, men that cause wars, men who beat the crap out of women and rape them, it's true on many levels.
Strongtea · 22-25, M
Yes I totally feel I need to agree with people for them to like me, I always seem to change my opinion to fit in but feel rubbish about it.
@Strongtea Yeah, it just depends on the person and what both you are comfortable with. There are more degenerates than good people here, without a doubt.
Strongtea · 22-25, M
Yep, there’s some weirdos. But they tend to back off if you. Get too real lol. You’ll make some good friends here I think.@Angelwarfare
@Strongtea Thank you T :-)
WaryWitchWandering · 36-40, F
I say what I think or nothing at all these days

I won’t pretend to agree anymore. Too tired for that shit, my energy can be used elsewhere. Some people have a different POV from me, and that’s ok. We all are making our decisions based off our own past experiences and where we are now.
@WaryWitchWandering

If I said what I really thought, I'd be banned from this site unfortunately.
Be yourself. You may well have legitimate reasons for disagreeing with them. That’s not on you. If they don’t respect a difference of opinion or a view not in synch with theirs; we’ll that is too bad.
@soar2newhighs

Yes, the very common/cliche phrase "Beeee yourself" but not many really are! I actually am one of those people and I'll tell people exactly how I feel online and offline because I really don't give a flying f who likes me or not. That said, unfortunately, many people in positions of power are stupid and small-minded. For example, they will find a reason to fire you (OR online, ban you) if they they disagree strongly with something you say. It's just the way the world works. You can't go around disagreeing with people and expect good things to happen to you. I know you mean well, but I really hope this is the last comment like this (but I'm happy you commented, you seem nice and reasonable). lol I promise I won't hate you for misunderstanding!
@Angelwarfare I see it like this: if you are willing to let others have dominance over you because you disagreed with them, then you become the loser.
You said it yourself, you don’t give a flying f. No argument t there.
Sadly as you say, there are those who are not able to deal with this. In their case either the wake up call will come or it won’t
It’s not about going around and disagreeing. It’s about not being afraid that you won’t be liked. Here your “I don’t give a flying f..” should come into play.
And here’s tenet, call it a cliche if you want: You are the most important person in your life!”
@soar2newhighs I agree with that, it's true but it's a case of idealism vs reality. Similar to something like it would be so wonderful if there were absolutely no guns/borders in the world vs. there are still violent people out there that can use knives, bombs, planes etc regardless.

Have you been banned online a lot? I have. Probably a 1000 times over the years for expressing what I know to be true and other people disagreeing with it. The reality is if you don't want problems and you want to eat, have a place to live you HAVE to agree with people because if you don't, if there is disagreement, you're gone. I'm not afraid of anyone, I'm feisty and as a woman, have never backed down or cowered from a man, I just know the reality of the world. Hope that helps you see my point of view.
I’ll stick to what I believe in and I won’t feel the need to agree with others if I don’t agree with them.

I may not always be correct, but I will not change opinion in order to be liked.
@CookieCrumbs Even if you're proven wrong or it's against what your boss thinks?
@Angelwarfare
You’re misunderstanding my reply.

At first, I may not know if my opinion is wrong or right. But I will not agree with others for the sake of being liked.

Now if I’m proven wrong, il accept it. But that has nothing to do with your question.
@CookieCrumbs Actually it does have to do with my question, maybe you didn't read it all because it was lengthy, don't blame you. 😁 I think it's good not to compromise how you feel, or your principles, based on what others think. I've quit a few jobs because of it. I'm lucky that I could though.
ABCDEF7 · M
I often have difference of opinion with most of my dear ones.

With others, I don't share my opinions.
Damnit… must be why ppl hate me… lolz

I’m very disagreeable 😎🕺
@TheOneyouwerewarnedabout This was agreeable and the only reason why you got a like/heart. Joking. 😁
@Roundandroundwego Haha same! I think my mere presence makes a lot of people angry.
@Angelwarfare during the Gulf War I spoke in my Palestinian regugee family against going on a joy ride on a nuclear sub - against normalizing the military in our family -
Been nobody proudly since!
Didn't help that the submarine killed innocent Japanese fishermen that night. Makes me extra nobody for longer than forever in that part of my family.
@Roundandroundwego I'm not sure I completely understand but that is some heavy stuff you're dealing with!
No, but I do defend their right to be wrong.
bugeye · 26-30, F
No. In fact a contrary opinion opens up the idea to a discussion. Even me and my BF have totally differing opinions on some major social issues. The problem isnt the differing opinion its how you aproach talking about it. Attacking/insulting the other person for it is what gets you disliked.
@bugeye Actually, I completely disagree. You can state your rational opinion calmly and respectfully still have people attack you and hate you. It happens all the time.

Also, it's important to see that sometimes people's views are disrespectful i.e. GENUINE white supremacists. I don't believe those views deserve a respectful reply.
Nevaeh0081 · 36-40, F
I agree to disagree.

Why should someone else's opinion matter more than mine.

I mean, maybe if it made sense, or is better than mine.

Respect though.

Everyone's entitled to their own thoughts, feelings and phases.
@Nevaeh0081 I'm confused why you think I think other people's opinion are better than mine. Can you please explain why you think this?
@PersistenceOfMemory People are manipulative unfortunately. Some will resort to violence if proven wrong.
PersistenceOfMemory · 31-35, F
@Angelwarfare " Some will resort to violence if ..... " , you say !? Then keep the distance !! And , why your wish to be liked from such people , i don't get it !!!
@PersistenceOfMemory I certainly DON'T wish to be liked by them. I have to be liked by them. There is a huge difference there. Unfortunately, some of us can't choose who we are around all the time.
Yes it's where I constantly go wrong. 😂
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@Torsten Yes it does and I'm tired of the huge egos answering here, if I'm honest. Gonna delete this. You're not sincere.
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