The thing that triggered an anxiety attack:

Saw two coworkers strolling side by side at work. The sight really hit me....the fact that they get along....the fact that they are at least a bit well liked enough to be able to publically display that they are "work friends".
No one likes to talk to me when other co-workers are around. They better not be caught talking to me. Because it's against the unspoken rules. Everyone must abide by it. Talking to me will turn them into a laughingstock as well. They'll be teased about it forever. It will become sort of a stain on their professional image.

How do I always end up like this.....

I wish I was someone else.

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elafina · 36-40, F

Become that someone else. It's you, you just need to work with your limiting beliefs.
Pick one. This "others don't like me".
Turn that around. You can begin by slowly changing your language.
"This situation is slowly improving for me".
Do not deny your truth.
But once you've seen your truth and recognising that it's not serving you and you are feeling that, you'd like to change it..
Begin now. Change your narrative slowly, day by day. Continue the work. Fail and get back, COMMIT to change it. Put a time. Look at it at the end of each month.
I love you ❤️ for whatever that might bring. I see you. I accept who you are fully, with your imperfections and with all the badass crazy skillset of charms that I see hidden within you.
You'll get it.
Me too, I'm a work in progress. But don't give up...chin up (literally!!!)

assemblingaknob · 26-30, F

@elafina thank you elafina. Means a whole lot to me.
I'm also a work in progress.

SW-User

I feel for you. Can I share some quotes?

“Don’t wish it were easier. Wish you were better.” - Jim Rohn

“Do not pray for easy lives. Pray to be stronger men! Do not pray for tasks equal to your powers. Pray for powers equal to your tasks.“ - Phillip Brooks

“Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one.” - Bruce Lee

You see, these quotes all have the same meaning that we should better ourselves, rather than wishing our lives were easier. This is in response of you saying you wish you were somebody else.

If you can’t change what’s around you, you can most definitely change what you do and how you feel. You’re there to make money, not to make friends. Rather, the goal should be focused on how to do even better at your job to maybe get a promotion or a raise. Besides, coworkers are usually snakes and don’t make good company. If I can offer an advice, it’s to focus on improving yourself, like your image. That way, people would respect you, not see you as some unspoken rule.

assemblingaknob · 26-30, F

@SW-User if only it were that easy.

SW-User

@assemblingaknob life isn’t easy. Otherwise, we wouldn’t be having all the problems that we do. As long as there’s light at the end of the tunnel..

twistedrope · 26-30, M

Everyones got issues imo. Big issues and baggage and such. You and me are some people with big baggage. If everyone avoids you, oh well. They'll come crawling back if they need what your work produces. That's how I get to talk to people.

And I can be assured, I do not avoid talking to anyone. i will however stop talking to someone if they are rude and misunderstand me. The cruel and ignorant are bunched up in this category.

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elafina · 36-40, F

@assemblingaknob oh god that's wonderful news 😊 work with a therapist will accelerate your progress, I'm so happy for you...:)
Of course it's a bumpy road..but you're in it..
I had a challenging week myself last week but I got put strong and kicking again ;))

SW-User

@elafina yeah, I understand and that’s why I enjoyed reading what you wrote. I come here for the same reasons too.

My name is just the word “death” that floats in my head often. It was just a word chosen to make a username, and it describes how dark and gloomy my world was when I made the account. I’ve since made some progress to be at peace with everything, even death itself. The Latin phrase “memento mori”, reminds me that everyone must die when their time comes, so it’s going to be okay. Everyone dies, therefore, we should make the best of what we got with the time we got. Dark stuff. It’s refreshing to see you spreading positive words to another. Keep doing your thing. 😊

elafina · 36-40, F

@SW-User I'm coming from a dark place to, or at least I've visited. I enjoyed your text, thank you, sincere ❤️

Coralmist · 41-45, F

But no one could ever be YOU. You have likes and dislikes and traits that Are JUST you...no one else could replicate it.🪻 One of my favorite quotes is by author Byron Katie.."Reality is always kinder than the stories we tell about it. But only always. "
Whether anyone talks to or accepts us, does not ever affect we have inherent WORTH..as is. Alone. Pure, full worth..in any moment. 💓

DarkHeaven ·

🖤🫂

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