The thing that triggered an anxiety attack:

Saw two coworkers strolling side by side at work. The sight really hit me....the fact that they get along....the fact that they are at least a bit well liked enough to be able to publically display that they are "work friends".
No one likes to talk to me when other co-workers are around. They better not be caught talking to me. Because it's against the unspoken rules. Everyone must abide by it. Talking to me will turn them into a laughingstock as well. They'll be teased about it forever. It will become sort of a stain on their professional image.

How do I always end up like this.....

I wish I was someone else.

This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »

twistedrope · 26-30, M

Everyones got issues imo. Big issues and baggage and such. You and me are some people with big baggage. If everyone avoids you, oh well. They'll come crawling back if they need what your work produces. That's how I get to talk to people.

And I can be assured, I do not avoid talking to anyone. i will however stop talking to someone if they are rude and misunderstand me. The cruel and ignorant are bunched up in this category.

assemblingaknob · 26-30, F

@twistedrope but they don't really need me. I'm just average. I'm not exceptionally bright for anyone to need me at some point.

This comment is hidden. Show Comment

assemblingaknob · 26-30, F

@elafina those things are so true. 🫂 Thank you!!!!!

elafina · 36-40, F

@assemblingaknob uh I'm not very sure I've convinced you yet... But I'm here.
I can feel somehow that you're on a pivotal point...
How are you doing today ?

SW-User

@elafina if you were my cheerleader, I’d be able to accomplish anything. Well done! 🤣🤣

elafina · 36-40, F

@SW-User assemblingaknob has earned my cheerleading. I'm not doing that actually... I see her, I understand. I've been through similar pathways... And I'm still going there once in a while so not to forget my origins and my roots.

But thank you for your heads up my dear, I'll take it as a compliment 🤗 What's your username is about ?

assemblingaknob · 26-30, F

@elafina I'm doing better! I got an appointment with a therapist so I'll be starting that too! Things will be better 🌞
Thank you so much elafina 🌸🤍 this is soooooooo kind!!!!!

elafina · 36-40, F

@assemblingaknob oh god that's wonderful news 😊 work with a therapist will accelerate your progress, I'm so happy for you...:)
Of course it's a bumpy road..but you're in it..
I had a challenging week myself last week but I got put strong and kicking again ;))

SW-User

@elafina yeah, I understand and that’s why I enjoyed reading what you wrote. I come here for the same reasons too.

My name is just the word “death” that floats in my head often. It was just a word chosen to make a username, and it describes how dark and gloomy my world was when I made the account. I’ve since made some progress to be at peace with everything, even death itself. The Latin phrase “memento mori”, reminds me that everyone must die when their time comes, so it’s going to be okay. Everyone dies, therefore, we should make the best of what we got with the time we got. Dark stuff. It’s refreshing to see you spreading positive words to another. Keep doing your thing. 😊

elafina · 36-40, F

@SW-User I'm coming from a dark place to, or at least I've visited. I enjoyed your text, thank you, sincere ❤️