Married but lonely my husband and I have been together for 17 years. In the beginning he was...

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Nick1 · 61-69, M

Sorry to hear. Many don’t appreciate what they have. He should understand your feelings and reciprocate. At least you are reaching out to him. He should understand that it’s hard to keep one way relationship without reciprocating and bestowing affection to partner. Other wise it may drift you apart.
It may be taking big emotional toll on you. Please stay strong.

Majorlatency · M

It'spar for the course for a lot of married people.. There are too many distractions outside of marriage, social media is a big one.. I am sorry for your pain. I can guarantee everyone reading this would acknowledge that they have the similar issues too. I think we have forgotten how to talk to one another. Alternatives are far too easy to find. Im sorry for your pain.

DownTheStreet · 56-60, M

Sorry to say it’s not uncommon. I don’t have any advice other than to chat with your female friends about it, and remember you don’t need a man for you to feel beautiful and worthy.

HumanEarth · F

You're not alone, many of us have done this very thing and God I know this pain and many others do to.

Some deal with it so they don't have to be alone in a empty house, and some hide the pain with humor, some cheat in hopes they get caught as a way out.

Maybe its time to leave. Trust me. The thought of leaving can be scary to some.

Royricky09

Okay... Tell me something that is unique happening here. This is part of every relationship. It can never be the same as you grow, your goals change, your priorities change and so many other things.
Surprise, all men are like that. Our way of love is different than yours. So that needs an understanding.
That's a shame you are already thinking of other men and a divorce.
A man has alot on his plate which he may or may not share with you.

carpediem · 61-69, M

There may be a connection between your damaged self esteem and his actions in more ways you might be considering. Go seek out a professional counselor. It's best if he joins you, but if he refuses, so see one yourself. You need a professional to review this with and build an action plan.

tiltawhirl · 36-40, F

I’m so sorry sweetie. Do find someone else lol. At least for affection. I know I guess I give bad advice. But if you ever wanna chat PM me lol maybe I can offer better advice but I’m in a sorta similar situation.

4meAndyou · F

Not QUITE as bad as my ex just before the divorce. We were actually going to couples counseling...when he could be bothered to show up. I just wanted some token of affection, like holding my hand when we were walking together in public. He assured the counselor that OF COURSE he would try to remember to do that. And then, the moment we were outside in the parking lot, he told me, "There is NO WAY I am going to do that."

YourMomsSecretCrush · M

from the way it sounds, that sort of thing is way more common than most realize. my second marriage was headed that way and then i left. best thing i ever did. i am way way happier now and in a much better relationship. i hope things get better for you soon.

powernap · 56-60, M

Please message me. I feel your pain 100 percent. I am in the same boat as you are. If you are truly serious about finding someone who will love and understand you, message me back. ❤🥰

GohantheThird · M

Relationships are hard, but they can def be managed. Men can sometimes become complacent or overly content, so they don't feel the need to put too much effort in. Perhaps try talking to him about this.

BiasForAction · M

Been there. Happy to share what I’ve learned and how couples cope if you want to message me.

Fairydust · F

I’m so sorry 😔

Did he say why he’s like that, Could he be depressed?

Stuff like that destroys marriages.

markinkansas · 61-69, M

kinda why some start cheating.. talk to him about your needs. getting angry does not work people get defensive . or see a counselor.. these people here are not a counselor . neither am i

JimboSaturn · 56-60, M

I feel your pain, I've been in a sexless marriage for a long time now.

Rambler · 61-69, M

It's can be so difficult... many others have been there too.... best wishes

QCDog2659 · 61-69, M

I am sorry.

That is not a way to live.

Talk to him before you seek physical comfort elsewhere.

in10RjFox · M

Marriage does this to many but still people get married blindly and suffer all life. Yes, you should start looking outside for the love and affection without disturbing home.

tobynshorty · 51-55, F

You need something to do. Take some classes on something you are interested in. The thing is to have other interests

acpguy · C

Are you over weight? I have seen this happen as women often are thin / better health when they date but after marriage they get fat and unappealing.

workathome · 56-60, M

aww, I'm sorry

Gingerbreadspice · F

Maybe you did everything too young. Ask yourself if this is what you want for the next 40ish years of your life. You have to search for an answer.

justbob · 61-69, M

Don't ask for it. Make it. Give him a kiss. Hug him. Snuggle up close to him. You don't have to wait for him to initiate

ABCDEF7 · M

Instead of just asking for it, have you tried to discuss it with him, trying to listen and understand the real reasons behind that? What was root cause of it? The issue from his perspective?

WandererTony · 56-60, M

Perhaps you should have a talk with him on this matter.

PepsiColaP

Ask for an open marriage maybe

496sbc · 36-40, M

dam thats sad. i feel bad for u hun