I tried so hard

I am truly sorry that he is not willing to work on the marriage, but that shows truly where his heart is, in wanting you to do all the work in the marriage. He's the loser in this situation. He doesn't understand what commitment means and those vows. I know it hurts now, but you can't lose what you never had and I'm sorry that he was so deceiving. You're better off without him. Don't pine over this guy. He's not worth it and he doesn't deserve you. What you really need to do, is kick him out, if he wants nothing to do with you and working on the marriage. Show him how strong you are and then look forward to finding someone who knows how to treat you respectfully and give you the love you deserve. I wouldn't cry one tear over this guy. And especially, please, don't blame yourself for this. Don't do that to yourself. I wouldn't waste a tear over him. I know it's hard and I deeply empathize with you, but you will be okay and you will go on to a better life and that's really something to look forward to. I wouldn't dare give him the satisfaction of showing that you're upset. This is what he wanted so let him lay in his own bed. In fact, I wouldn't say one more word to him. I would let him go ahead and do what he wants to do and act like it doesn't bother me at all, because it really wouldn't. Been there, done that. Pick yourself up, brush yourself off, and get on with your life. You'll be much happier than trying to live with someone who sounds like a narcissist. Don't fight him. Don't waste your time. Let him go ahead and get the divorce. That's what he's planning on anyway. I'll keep you in my prayers and pray that God will heal your heart soon. He will guide you and take care of you.

Such a shame to read this . However difficult the facts must be grappled with. Aside from 'deep love' a husbands core wish is to protect his wife & family.

For most men settling for anything less than this feels like a failure in his duty of care

It's the reason women are the ones who will mostly file for divorce & not men.

Knowing he is no longer interested in keeping his family together, suggests your continuing to try working at the marriage will be a waste of you energy & emotions. Which at this stage are better directed elsewhere.

You are entering a phase which is about
surviving while retaining dignity.


Redirect your energies on 'loving all the more ' your children & those who are supporting you throughout this is horrendous in your life.

You will come out of this okay people do.
This WILL be the making of you ... And not the end.

I wish you and your family all of the best in the future 💗

He's more than likely already got your replacement on the wings, I check his credit card records and see what a private investigator could find out. It'll help when you take that bastard to the cleaners.

/ it would be a slap in the face to everyone / but he's not sharing his life with everyone...
I'm sorry, it's sad when things take this direction

I'm so sorry to hear about this difficult situation with your husband. Ending a marriage is never an easy decision, and I understand this has been hard on you

Focus on taking care of yourself during this emotional time - spend time with loved ones, practice self-care, and lean on friends and family for support.

Your husband's mind may change in time, or it may not. But either way, try to find strength within yourself to move forward. There are always new chapters in life, even when one door closes. I hope in time you will be able to find peace, whatever that looks like for you in future.

For now, be gentle with yourself. You deserve comfort and understanding. Your feelings are valid. Take care!

Wishing you peace and healing.

I have to say, that's a really immature reason for leaving a marriage. Of course, if you're arguing all the time or constantly getting on each other's nerves, that's different, but just "not communicating right" and "not feeling the spark" is BS. After 5 years of marriage, it's not going to feel like it did when you just started dating.

When he says it would be a "slap in the face to everyone" if he changes his mind now, implies that he's already told a bunch of people that he plans to end the marriage before telling you. That's really concerning. Of course he should be able to confide in his friends, but ending his marriage because he doesn't want to disappoint them is being very disrespectful to you.

I'm really sorry you have to deal with this, especially with a kid. It sounds like he's leaving no matter what, so please don't feel like you have to be cooperative and considerate. Talk to a lawyer and try to soak him for child support, alimony, and anything else you can get from him. I would also recommend opening your own bank account and closing or taking your name off any joint credit cards to minimize any financial damage he might decide to inflict. You owe it to your daughter to protect yourself.

tell him whatever happened to...For better or for worse? The Honeymoon stage never lasts forever with everybody, even if he jumps the fence to greener paster, he is only decieving himself...I'm sorry he is such a child, May God pick you up when you are down, for God is close to the broken hearted. He will love you!

I'm sorry your marriage is failing. If you are doing all the work in maintaining the marriage and he's not pulling his part, you deserve to find someone else who will be fully committed to you.

I’m really sorry. Relationships are so hard and it sounds like he expected you to do all the work and it always be the wrong way to do it. Textbook narcissist. Please take time to love yourself and remember your worth. YOU are the winner in this.

Been there.
Time to move on.
Take some time to enjoy life.
"How to Survive the Loss of a Love" is a good book to help you through it.

Ive been married to my wife for 35 years. Its been tough at times, especially this year. Divorce has entered our arguments several times lately, but we're still together, still trying. It takes a lot of work, but it's worth trying. I pray things will work out for you two, and you have a child, so that makes it even more important to try. God bless you. 🤗🤗❤️❤️😇😇🙏🙏

He's gaslighting you. Trying to put the entire blame on you. It takes two to tango, and it takes two to make a marriage work. With human nature being what it is, I would suspect he has found someone else and has been having an affair. I am sorry your relationship is over, but you will ultimately be better off.

Hard, but you can find what makes you happy now...

Honestly, my heart goes out to you! Anytime one party tries and the other party makes excuses, they never wanted this from the get go. It’s not going to be easy, but you’re better off without him.🤗🌹🤗

So sad to read such messages. Also that you were taking the effort against a decision that was apparently already made.

Is there something else going on? Like someone else? Or the illusion of someone better?

God bless you.

It is sad but you would remain sad being with someone who you knew didn't want to be with you. Put if to the test if you are still unsure. Get dressed up and go out and see his reaction.

Sometimes, you have to let go of what is not to be in order to find better things beyond the current horizon.

I’m so sorry for you. Take care of yourself and give yourself time to heal.

I feel for you. Sounds like it is over. I know it will be severe for you. You must move on forward now. Get a lawyer. Take great care of you. Better find out now then years down the road. You are young. Decades and decades left to explore the world. You dound shocked. Was this a complete surprise to you? He sounds unloving. Cruel. Had this planned for some time. Keep us updated.

That man is emotionally cheating on you, he cant tell you youre acting wrong and when you try to change your behavior not even acknowledge it and claim it would be a slap to the face of people who dont matter and how he put in soooo much effort to leave thst he be bothered to try to fix things, fucker deserves to be divorced and you deserve better!

This is terrible. No marriage would last if everyone who had those problems broke up instead of doing their best to get through it and keep growing together. I hope you have not had children, and can move on and, in time, find someone better.

He’s given up. He’s decided to be done. That slap in the face is going to get him regardless.
I’m sorry he’s putting you through this. It’s cruel of him.

I'm so sorry ☹️ at least you tried your best to make it work

So sorry x but he doesn’t deserve someone like you

I am so sorry you lost your mate. I do believe it is in your best interest though. By the time he told you he was tired of being with you he was already immersed in another relationship. No one deserves this. Good luck to you and your precious daughter

I know your husband will look back with deep regret (someday) when he realizes how petty and insignificant were the issues he had with you compared to all the love you gave him. Bob Dylan expressed it so well in the song, "I THREW IT ALL AWAY."

I'm sorry for the breakup. I had a similar situation with my ex wife. Always tough when kids are involved. I don't get the slap in the face part. You were his wife and should have been his highest priority. Maybe family was involved. Wishing you all the best.

I'm so sorry to hear this. It must be so hard for you. But it's best to pull off the Band-Aid fast and get it over with so you can start work on healing and moving forward.

Things will get better. Just hang on.

It takes two to tango. Sounds like his mind was made up...and quite possibly he has found someone else...if he will not put any effort into improving your relationship he is not worth chasing.

I'm so sorry for you too. You can't force him to stay. He needs to figure it out for himself. Hopefully he will want to stay..

I'm sorry this is happening to you . Marriage is hard work but it takes two to make it work . It's not fair for all of it to.be put on you .

you can do better

*Spark* is for the new love, the hot experience.
it is not the basis ia ma told of long term happyness

He should put out more effort in marriage counseling if by chance he hasn’t been in another emotional relationship.

So sad. You did your part. Seems like he has emotionally left already Sorry to hear

I actually suspect he found someone else and that s why he wouldn't change his mind...sad...

Take a vacation together. It worked for me for a few years

So sorry to hear your marriage is ending despite your trying so hard.

I’d say it’s him, and not you. You’re good. I believe it.

So sorry. I hope you can build new life for yourself.

I'm sorry you're going through this.

hope you're doing okay

I’m sorry

that is tragic :(

I am sorry

makes sense