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46-50, M
United States
92 views · 4 followers · Online: Weeks ago (date?)
My stories will paint a better picture...
About Me
Join Time
1st 2 Yrs of SW
Days Active
1 Mth Active
Stories
20 Stories
Groups
25 Groups
I Spend a Lot of Time By Myself
... and I am thinking about spending more! So many crossroads are fast approaching in my life, and much like MY life, I don't always know which I might take until it is upon me. One juncture ahead seems to be whether or not to remain in a rela...
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46-50, M
6
6 replies
19 views
Feb 25, 2018
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I Like It When It Rains
It's early. Early-ish, I suppose. The time of day when respectable, responsible... hell, downright sensible folks are meandering comfortably through their Saturday sunrise routine. The late winter sun softly caresses the kitchen tile. Under ...
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46-50, M
0
0 replies
5 views
Feb 17, 2018
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I Am Lonely
Slow death... Alone... aloneness. Alone with all my friends - what a strange, yet accurate, concept. I have two amazing teenage children (almost adults!) and a woman who professes to love me. I have friends I spend time with, friends who check in...
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46-50, M
3
2 replies
15 views
Feb 14, 2018
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I Am Sometimes Antisocial
Today is one of those days... friends, once - now distant... nothing in common, nothing to share, no room for them in this dark cave. Dreaming of new sunrises, fresh prairies, unfamiliar but friendly smiles. I have worn this place out, stayed jus...
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46-50, M
6
4 replies
7 views
Jul 22, 2017
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I Am Working On Myself
How do I work on myself when in a relationship? She is quiet... by nature. Until she isn't. Today I had to turn my ears up to hear her. She had money troubles. I sympathized. She was quiet. Smiled here and there, but not the eyes. I dro...
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46-50, M
1
2 replies
12 views
Jul 19, 2017
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I Am Working On Myself
How does one not? The thought of rambling through this life numb, oblivious, willingly dumbed-down, unaware... Unimaginable. Although I truly cannot imagine a life without introspection and growth, it makes me sad trying to. Sure my brain can leav...
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46-50, M
2
0 replies
1 views
Jul 17, 2017
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I Feel So Alone
Today especially. It is the weekend. I have no close friends other than my GF. My children are with their mother for the next few days. I have run out of projects. The sun is out, but the car is with my GF who is at work. Alone. Lonely. Sad. Fee...
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46-50, M
1
13 replies
17 views
Jul 16, 2017
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I Have a Dark Side
... And sometimes it can be comical. Yesterday I was driving to the local city - about an hour from my coastal town (where I very much appreciate the "slower" pace of living). On the highway, I was rolling along at 70... wishing I was d...
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46-50, M
5
12 replies
23 views
Jul 14, 2017
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I Believe In Love
Yes, I believe in it... Just wondering why, as I age, it seems more and more elusive? She lay beside me each night, we touch, make love, smile, say the words - but still I struggle with an empty feeling inside. It is not all encompassing, the empty...
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46-50, M
8
21 replies
23 views
Jul 13, 2017
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I Believe In Love
My previous post... well, it was written about 2 years ago and today, this morning... right now... I am struggling with the same empty feeling that has been creeping in time and time again lately. Questions swirl in my brain - am I in love? Am I cap...
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46-50, M
5
7 replies
20 views
Jul 3, 2017
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I Believe People Come Into Your Life For a Reason
Yesterday... The blues clouded my vision like the rolling and tumbling clouds that blackened and bullied the high sun.  Alone, yet with all my friends, I roared my blood red monster over hills and around bends - unsure what I was running from or towa...
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46-50, M
7
4 replies
11 views
Jul 2, 2017
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I Am Fascinated By Human Behavior
I seem to have toe'd the line and always have, for as long as I can remember.  Maybe not as extremely as I did in my late teens and twenties... But as a young boy I certainly welcomed that feeling in my gut I had no name for.  Still don't. ...
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46-50, M
3
6 replies
6 views
Jul 2, 2017
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I Believe In Love
Never have i known such intense love... Sure, I've felt maybe there was something beyond the next ridge, somewhere along one of life's many switchbacks - only the guarding lodgepole pines, clacking against one another in tender laughter, kn...
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46-50, M
2
1 reply
8 views
Jul 2, 2017
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I Am Not What People Expect
... Including myself. It exists.  And it is different, much different, than that alone place I find when meditating.  The empty place is unrecognizable in that it is devoid of all ties to my otherwise everyday life.  Meditation is a quieting of my m...
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46-50, M
5
7 replies
13 views
Jul 1, 2017
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I Have Done Things I Am Not Proud of
The light changed, his horn blew.  That quickly.  The unwelcome blare startled and instantly angered me.  I pressed on the gas pedal and proceeded through the green light as the SUV swerved, then accelerated around me.  The driver, locking eyes wit...
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46-50, M
4
13 replies
34 views
Jul 1, 2017
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DeadNGone | Similar Worlds