Assuming you were single, unattached…

I think that when you are with someone, and it's a true committed, healthy relationship, you just want to be with that person. No matter what. You crave their companionship. You are so focused on that person, that other things don't compute.

If one party is focused on controlling the meets and greets, there is something wrong with the person or situation. I'd never settle. I know what it's like to be loved, valued and cherished beyond measure. I deserve to be loved and cared for that way.

I get that a relationship is only meant to be shared between two people, but when you take public settings out of the equation it can kind of mess with your head and heart a bit too much. It’s feels too limiting. There’s something about your partner being proud to be seen with you in public. It just fills your heart with all kinds of affirmation.

Umm a single person is by default unattached. 8-) But moving on...

With my second ex I used to have a big problem being confident to want to be in public with her because of her negative attitude towards me after we began living together. Until we did, things were great and dates were really lovely and perhaps living apart prevented me seeing her true traits.

Once living togther she would rarely if ever dress up for me - only ever to impress others (mostly her female medical professional friends) which made being social with her 'circle' awkward. Sex was always only about her pleasure once we lived together - it was like I was just a handbag to be trotted out now and then. Soon after we moved in together she stopped being openly flirty and intimate and even baths/showers became exclusive 1-person things.

I have always had huge social phobia issues but a lover is supposed to make you feel comfortable, happy and want to be with them in all circumstances. For a really long time I have not felt that.

I don't know. Infatuation is a strong drug and I haven't felt it for a very long time so the way I know myself, I think I'd agree for some time. However, the reason couldn't be that they are in a relationship with someone else. I'd stay away from such situation at all costs.

We aren't talking the situation where a son of old money billionaires have strict rules about who to get involved with set by his parents and he's basically waiting till they die, right? 😂 Just my wild imagination, sorry.

Reasoning would definitely have to be a key issue. I couldn't just assume the reasoning was me or with anyone else that I know.

Assumptions are dangerous.

You probably know, that I am single and unattached. I need to know the reasons before judging.

I'm pretty sure not. Most every reason I can think of as to why someone couldn't or didn't want to be seen with me, wouldn't be something I'd be okay with.

My bf doesn't like to be seen with me. He walks ahead of me or behind me in public. We don't go on dates unless it's out of town. I've never met his friends or family. 🤷🏻‍♀

Not single & no longer unattached, but used to be - So no.

That situatution shouts dishonesty and disrespect.

No, I couldn't, that would be a deal breaker for me even for just a friendship.

No I'd rather be alone

No, not how I'd want to live my life with someone.

Nah, I'd rather be single.
It would always feel like I’m only allowed a shadow of their attention.

I can understand why a woman wouldn’t want to be seen in public with me, but it would still hurt.

No ,I've never sneak around with somebody, especially if they had someone else in their life already.
I won't be somebody secret.
I also will not be a willing party to hurt another woman.

Nah.

Id want someone who wanted to share life with me. Seeing stuff, trying stuff and doing shit together.

Chilling at home is nice, but one of the best things about having someone else .... Is to share the fun together.

I can't really picture that, no.

Nah
I was in a scenario kinda like that before and it felt bad

couldn't I just go out with a COVID mask on?
people tell me I look better that way anyway.

or maybe just go to dark movie theaters after the movie starts?

we could buy tickets separately and sit on different rows :)

Definitely not.A person's motivation for not wanting to be seen with you in public is not only just strange ,but sketchy and suspicious to say the very least.

I'd pass

No way.

No that would feel awful

It sounds like a strange set up to me, and I would wonder why. No, I don't think I could.

No, absolutely not.

No. I would consider that too much.

Solid NO.

There are some character traits so unconscionable, so vile, they annihilate any longing or care you ever possesed for the individual.

Kind of like dating someone with stinky feet. You can tolerate it for a while, but it would grit on you and one day you would just have had enough. "Get out you with stinky feet, and take your stinky shoes too"

No, something like that is degrading

It's hard for me to imagine a scenario in which I would be comfortable with this

No...that seems shady.

The only time this has ever happened to me it was because he was entertaining other side pieces.

totally sus

Not a chance

I could see someone wanting me on the DL.

It depends. Did she vote for Trump?

What? That's really sus. Bigtime pass.

Absoposilutely NO !!!

Maybe her ex is like a psycho killer so I guess I could put up with it for a while maybe. 🤔

No, it sounds like they are just waiting for someone better to do the job.

Must be doing for the thrill or something ; love is blind, lust is often just dumb

Naw, because why not in public. It seems weird and could lead to a lot of unnecessary drama