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How do you proceed when people scream at you in the workplace ?

My gentleness, politeness and soft voice often make people believe that if they scream at me, the rules and regulations applied for [b]everyone[/b] will somehow be disrespected especially for them. I and the whole team get blamed even when clearly the client did not respect the procedures (already sent to them). I try to go by protocol asking them to keep a respectful tone but it's like .. nothing works. Do you know an instant way to make a screamer calm the heck down ? I am there to help but I just can't endure it anymore. I have to find a strategy to make them shut up and listen (it is hard to be taken serious with a soft voice lol).. any ideas ?
Busybee333
31-35, F
34 replies 65 views Nov 13, 2019
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sspec
Patience is Not my asset. Either I heard (not listened) half-heartedly or just gave back.
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Mar 21, 2023
LithiumDrop
Oh no. I worked as a dialer for folks who got notices that their medications were out of stock a few years ago. A lot of them would call back UPSET.

Whenever someone was rude with me, I just kept quiet. There’d be a silence on my end until they were done venting their frustration, screaming or whatever.

I’d stay quiet even after they finished and they’d usually apologize for screaming at me. LOL

Don’t let it get to you. You’re just working there lol
+ 2 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
Busybee333 · 31-35, F
@LithiumDrop Thank you for the advice :)
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
ozgirl512 · 26-30, F
Sounds like a toxic environment .. In some cases you can't win, it may sound counter intuitive, but try talking even softer, people will often lower their voice then to hear you, also keep asking what rule or procedure I've broken and ignore everything else they say ..
+ 2 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
Busybee333 · 31-35, F
@ozgirl512 yes, some people go deaf to other words but their own. I tried some general strategies but .. some people don't logic.. at all. They do not understand. Period. My boss told me to not be afraid to stand up to them and if this happens again to call him. He said he will talk in person if someone is being like this. He wouldn't allow people to be that disrespectful and wreck havoc in his office. He told me even if I lose the client, mutual respect is more important.
+ 2 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
ozgirl512 · 26-30, F
@Busybee333 sounds like you have a good boss there... Maybe try this... Next time this guy is doing his Nana, pull out your phone and say quietly" do you mind if I record this"... When he stops and asks why, just smile and say, for the record.... Guarantee his bully boy tactics will calm down ;)
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
in10RjFox · M
I don't react instantly but stay calm with a smile and let them scream .. and then point out their mistake one by one by switching to email. I usually don't shout back but rebuke by email. This way the email also stays as proof which can help later as to how we handle issues and resolve problem.

But can give you better tips if I know more about your work, and how you can structure your workflow. Often it is a clash of "things to do" at the same time.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Feb 24, 2020
Busybee333 · 31-35, F
Jk . English is not my first language . I'm fairly good and clear enough. The message just doesn't always pass. In communications class they called it.... "noise" xD it doesn't necessarily come from the speaker.. it can be anything preventing the other side from grasping the information. Life is a broken telephone like that.. xD
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Feb 24, 2020
in10RjFox · M
@Busybee333 I find your communication and lingo quite clear. So you need not step back thinking that English is not your first language. In verbal communication both parties have something to say which often leads to a clash as neither wants to switch to listening mode. So if you adapt the knack of being a listener first .. you can go a long way.

I visualised this as street hawkers of the past carrying their merchandise on their head and all of us are such hawkers and each want to sell their merchandise to another but none want to buy.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Feb 25, 2020
Busybee333 · 31-35, F
@in10RjFox Thank you for your support :) Listening well is the most important part in providing the right information - I agree 100% ! Still learning it . Sometimes I repeat their demands to make sure that we are on the same page :) In some cases, we have to enforce certain rules just for order. When these rules are disrespected, the client bears some consequences. Ofc many don't like that hahah. I'm trying to ignore my affect when clients blame it on us. Most of the time it's not personal. Who doesn't have bad days ? XD
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Feb 25, 2020
GoldButterfly · F
Find another job. In the mean time don't let them see you get upset. They target us with gentle personalities to get to us. Even if you want to scream back always respond back with a respectful tone and words. That will make them back off you. And start looking for a better place to work. No one should have to put up with that kind of disrespect.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
allsfinebime2 · M
They scream, and you don't react to their screaming. Only utter the words such as I cannot help you with your problem if I cannot understand what the problem is because you are yelling.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 23, 2019
330GTC · 56-60, M
I take them aside to somewhere private and then beat them to a fruit juicy pulp...figuratively speaking.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
Busybee333 · 31-35, F
@330GTC thank you for your answer 😆
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
330GTC · 56-60, M
@Busybee333 good management does not belittle anyone in front of others...even in retaliation.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
trackman11 · 61-69, M
This has to be incredibly frustrating. Sorry people are so disrespectful.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 14, 2019
bhatjc · 46-50, M
You just back away. Let a manager handle it.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 18, 2019
SStarfish ·
They wouldnt dare..
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
DearAmbellina2113 · 41-45, F
Well the last time a customer yelled at me in the workplace, I yelled back and then kicked everyone out of the store so I could close early and go home. 🤷🏻‍♀️ #DontTryMe
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
Busybee333 · 31-35, F
@DearAmbellina2113 hahaha boss attitude ! Your comment cheered me up :D
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
DearAmbellina2113 · 41-45, F
@Busybee333 lol!! The company sent me to anger management. But it was worth it.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
SW-User
I'd just cry.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
CountScrofula · 41-45, M
What's the nature of the work?
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
Busybee333 · 31-35, F
Also, age. Usually it is the taller and older people. I bite my lips not to bluntly answer something in the lines of "look I am not your daughter or relative , you cannot speak to me like that. Keep a respectful tone or get out". It is blunt and unprofessional but I might accidentally say it some day -_- ...
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
CountScrofula · 41-45, M
@Busybee333 Ugh. The big piece of advice I can give is to let the angry people talk themselves out. Let 'em rant and then restate yourself. Don't engage until they're calmer. Check your company policy as well because there may be something about your ability to remove yourself from those conversations. If someone is abusive you may have some protections under labour law.

If you don't have protections, your options become either to force the company to give them to you or find other work both of which are shitty and stressful. :\ Wish there was an easier solution. Customer service is messed up.
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
Busybee333 · 31-35, F
@CountScrofula thank you, I will apply your advice . Well, I don't want to quit. Let's see if this works. If not I may have to. The truth is, arrogance can happen anywhere .. I have to know how to deal with it in all cases :) 💕
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
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Busybee333 · 31-35, F
@Kingfish28 I cannot use that in the workplace.
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Nov 13, 2019
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darshak89 · 31-35, M
Show your power to them..
+ 0 · Reply · Translate · Jun 10, 2020
 
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