Can only speak for my own experience: Spouse's extramarital affair.

Still, I blame myself..Either I just chose the wrong person to trust, or I did something wrong, or didn't do something right.

Just the way I've always seen it even after 30 years, and always will.

[image deleted]Saves on the paperwork!
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It's awful. Personally, I have the worst possible judgement in men. I always think men are wonderful. I go starry eyed and walk around bumping into things. It's like I'm a little kid that got to go to Disneyland...but then the disillusionment starts.

I walked in on two of my ex-husbands.The first time I was out playing tennis with a friend, came home early and there was a 14 year old girl in the house with the ex. AND she was snotty...to ME. The second ex, I came home sick from work, and there he was with his future 2nd wife in our house. That was the worst one, unbelievably, because I was only 23 and I had a baby. He threatened to put a hit on me, broke open the back door with a pry bar and stole all of the appliances awarded to me by the court...and then played at being a deadbeat Dad. More than 10,000.00 in arrears.

The third one, I discovered after about 13 years was ill...just mentally ill in so many ways. Physically abusive until I started sending him to jail...and then he switched...to pure madness. Gas lighting, screaming at the top of his lungs for NO reason...threatened to lock me up...and I realized I have this ONE life...ONE. And more than half of it is gone. I finally decided I just want to live the rest of it in peace, without some monster screaming at me.

So that is how I cope. I tried for a long time, and then I realized it is me. It is MY poor judgement. I always pick the same man. Charming, loves a good time, and seems so perfect and fun...but marriage shows you the illusions.

Would it be a cliche to say that he was abusive?? He honestly was and I played my part in it by accepting it for so many years despite the painful life I was going through....

Until I realizrd that I was living with a stranger whom I didnt love anymore...

It's better to have loved and lost,than to live with a psycho for the rest of your life.

Because murder is illegal

Got tired of feeling like I wasn’t equal anymore, no respect, verbal abuse, constant criticism, fault finding, gas lighting, negative moods, narcissistic behaviours... cheating to name a few... i did try for many years, I really didn’t want this but comes a time when enough is enough, I need to be happy now.

I’ve yet to get a divorce, but feel so much better now he’s gone, maybe taking one day at a time and look after yourself...

Concentrate on positive things. Work family, your health, friends and exercise, start a new hobby, It’s can only get better 💃🏼😬☺️🤗

Many reasons. Financial independence and a good circle of friends and family that can support you are important. Focusing on work ,rebuilding your life ,strengthening relationships you might have neglected while married etc. Theres many coping mechanisms. It really depends on the person and your resources

When they realize it's not working...it's nice if you can both move on but stay friends ....if you have kids then it's really important to both get on ....

What starts it Usually in my experience is the lack of communication .., then infidelity creeps in ... and couples drift apart

I had to. She was pretty mean.

Conversations like this...

Her: Should I make the roast in the slow cooker or in the oven?
Me: Why not just use the Nesco?
Her: (upset) I [b]said[/b] [i]SLOW COOKER[/i], and I don't like it that way, that's why I want to use the oven.
Me: Then why are you asking me, just make it the way you've done before, it was fine.
Her: I always used the Nesco (getting more angry) and I just told you I DON'T LIKE IT!
Me: (smh)
Her: (even angrier) I was just seeking your advice, you don't have to get all judgemental!

Yeah, I'd rather be alone...

I think they need to divorce to be able to cope, you see the scarier option is staying with the person who's wrong and just losing yourself

Marrying the wrong person,you realize that over a short period of time.

Living with an abusive person is very difficult. I held on way longer than I should have.

Most people aren't meant to stay together for too long 🤷‍♂️

It gets old, familiarity breeds contempt. They no longer feel served and catered to. Sex isn't exciting. Selfishness, Lack of this lack of that, blah blah. Yeah sometimes it's for hardcore reasons that are legit. But could be they [b]both[/b] need to take a good look at themselves

i never got married

Personally, I don't think staying with one partner for life is consistent with our nature. Yes, there are people who do it, which suggests that perhaps other factors are more influential at times than nature.

Aren't replies limited to a certain number of characters???