Love & Attraction

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Why would a guy observe you for years w/o talking to you

exexec · 61-69, C

Lack of confidence. A guy told my wife at a high school reunion that he always had a crush on her and still thought of her, but he lacked the confidence to approach her. Plus, he was afraid I would kick his butt.

Fawma123 · 46-50, M

@exexec im guessing he's found his confidence

exexec · 61-69, C

@Fawma123 Yes. It only took 15 years.

Queendragonfly · 31-35, F

Because he's too shy. I had an ex who stalked me for a year at school. I had no idea he liked me, I waved Hi to him as a stranger once and he just ran away.

We also entered the same train once, I thought he looked familiar since we had been in the same group when it was school start and all students competed against eachother. But he looked at me and said nothing.

During that school day he said maybe two words to me so I didn't catch his interest that well. 😂

Instead he's been saying to his therapist everything he wanted to tell me. But we got together because we ended up in a random group of people who wanted to see Star Wars through mutual friends. And I texted him in dm.

He told me he saw my text when he was at a friend's house and totally panicked. "IT'S HER!!! SHE TEXTED!! WHAT SHOULD I RESPOND??"

His friend: How about a Hello back?

Just. The most shy awkward man I have ever met in history.

ViciDraco · 36-40, M

@Queendragonfly probably this...

Never was quite this bad, but i know the struggle, haha.

bugeye · 26-30, F

My bf was like this in high school. I knew he had a crush but he was always a quiet reserved guy. I could yell he was trying to ask me out but could never get the words out.

One day i just snuck up behind him grabbed him n told him he was my bf now. Nearly a decade later now and counting :D

Flenflyys · 31-35, F

He’s just orbiting, he doesn’t want to progress. The reason doesn’t matter; it could be a million different things.

mindstruggle · 31-35, F

@Flenflyys
This is true.

JRVanguard · 26-30, M

Has a crush on you but very socially awkward

StevetheSleeve · 31-35, M

Maybe he thinks you’re out of his league.

NewBeginnings7790 · 41-45, F

Gathering data

Ontheroad · M

This is very common and it happens without regard to age. I'd guess way over half of the men around have had a crush on at least one woman they were afraid (too shy) to talk to.

rfhh1959 · 61-69, M

Not knowing more than what you asked:
1) Co-Worker: Fear that if you say no he will be turned into HR for sexual harassment either by you or someone else.
2) If you are never alone (per say) i.e. always with a girl friend or in a group of friends many guys find it more difficult to approach a woman
3) He may lack the confidence to approach and if you wish to explore a relationship you may need to make the first move which is not a hint. Men are terrible about hints.

MorbidCynic · F

Because he’s creepy

3Dogmatic · 46-50, M

Creepy creeper

Patriot96 · 56-60, C

Could be very shy

sunriselover · M

Shyness. And fear of rejection.
The more times you are rejected the harder it gets.

Men have to be thick skinned and learn to be detached. And often become hard.

Over the years I developed resilience.

thewindupbirdchronicles · 46-50, M

The amount of negative responses here are telling, and they could be true, but maybe he wanted to impress you? You've never given how he observed you.