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Do you give people the opportunity to apologize for grievances you hold against them, that might or might not actually be as you initially viewed them

through angry eyes?

Or do you shut down, close up, and walk away, and never to speak to them again?

What is your way?
Tumbleweed · F
No. I do not. If I've given someone my trust and they do or say something that makes me feel betrayed, I'm all done.
This just happened to me at work yesterday.
Tumbleweed · F
@LadyBronte Very true.
I just feel that my peoples know how I am and that I am a true blue friend to them so I guess I expect the same in return :(
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@Tumbleweed I think those who are special to me would know the same about me. That doesn't always happen. And when it doesn't, it honestly rips my heart out. 🤷🏼‍♀
Tumbleweed · F
@LadyBronte Same :(
BlueVeins · 22-25
I usually try to forgive them without that, or just get bored of being angry, for better or worse. Flaw of mine.
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@BlueVeins Some would say flaw. Some would say virture.
Umile · 41-45, F
I get pissed, give the silent treatment, then hear them out.

But, if it's a pattern, I try to see and understand it.
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@Umile Same.
Justmeraeagain · 56-60, F
First I think,and if the grievance was blown out of proportion then I just automatically forgive.
I don't hold my breath waiting for a apology.
I think if we have grievances against someone we need to discuss it with them .
If they constantly dismiss, downplay, or refuse to accept any reasponbility,then I know this is a person I want to have zero to very limited contact with.
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@Justmeraeagain Very wise.
Adogslife · 61-69, M
That’s hard to say. I really don’t hold many grudges. But, by the same token, I don’t give them control over my life either.

If there’s something bothering me, I’ll confront the situation/person immediately. I’m very calm, but I don’t hold back either.
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@Adogslife Best way to be. I normally don't give that much control either. But it has happened.
Adogslife · 61-69, M
@LadyBronte And the 2nd part of your statement applies as well. Sometimes you just have to walk away when situations are well beyond your tolerance.

If you can push my tolerance, that means I’m pretty much done anyway. There won’t be a Christmas card. 😂
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@Adogslife I was happy until it all went to Hell in a handbasket. *shrug* Next time, if there is one which I doubt, I won't be foolish and repeat it.
I give way too much time, and far too many chances. BUT, once I finally realize that waiting for apologies or reconciliation is futile, I shut down, close up, and walk away, never to speak to them again... and it feels GOOOOD!
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
If it's someone I care about I will always give chances until I shut down

There's only so many chances I will give until I just become indifferent
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
Casheyane · 31-35, F
It would depend on how much you know them and how much they know you.

I've had friends whom I told deep hurts to. In the end, either the words went to their ear and got out on the other or they just did not care. Because they ended up doing exactly the same thing as what I told them hurt me before.

I closed the door for that one.I think it did me good. Though I have to say, sometimes I do still wonder what might have happened if we managed to work it out.
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@Casheyane There is always wondering, or at least for me
If someone wanted to apologize for something, I'd probably fall over, then be delighted to engage them.
@LadyBronte We should all be like you!
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@SomeMichGuy Oh lord! What a mess the world would be in if everyone was like me. 😉😆
@LadyBronte Well, not if we were all like you as apologizers when in the wrong.
Ontheroad · M
Sure, why not? But once they've apologized or explained, and continue in the same vein, I'm done—I'm out of there for good.
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@Ontheroad Agreed.
Selah ·
I give people a chance to humble themselves and they never take it. They force my hand. I have to leave.
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@Selah 😔
craig7 · 70-79, M
It's been pretty rare,but if anyone offends,upsets or seriously crosses me - they do so for life.That's it.
wildbill83 · 36-40, M
Fool me once, shame on you
Fool me twice, shame on me
Fool me thrice...

LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@wildbill83...no way in hell.
Shybutwilling2 · 61-69
Yes im open to an apology
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@Shybutwilling2 As am I, but they are rare.
Yes. It’s never too late for apologies and I’m very forgiving to offenders however they usually never come. 😏
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@NoGamesTolerated People have an issue with apologies, both the giving and the getting. So much pain could be avoided, so much peace of mind and closure could be found in such a simple act.
@LadyBronte I am one creature that has no problem giving or receiving. Yes, so much pain could be eliminated and relationships of any nature restored if it’s genuinely from the heart!
Donotfolowme · 51-55, F
Yes I give them time before I lock myself out of their life.
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@Donotfolowme I do as well.
candycane · 31-35, F
They never let me so I move along and never talk again
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@candycane Fair enough.
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LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@Coldplay I can't blame you for that.
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LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@nedkelly Fair enough.
nedkelly · 61-69, M
@LadyBronte I am straight to the point
LadyBronte · 56-60, F
@nedkelly Yes, that sure doesn't need leave any room for argument.

 
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