Gusman · 61-69, M
I am really sad your son was put through this ordeal.
My hope is that this will not stop him going to Scouts as I am sure he and his brother truly enjoy their time there.
Meeting with the den leader, maybe discussing you and Joel talking with the scout group about how hurt your son was with what was said. I know that a discussion with them might have the perpetrators gaining empathy and compassion.
My hope is that this will not stop him going to Scouts as I am sure he and his brother truly enjoy their time there.
Meeting with the den leader, maybe discussing you and Joel talking with the scout group about how hurt your son was with what was said. I know that a discussion with them might have the perpetrators gaining empathy and compassion.
Cigarguy · 41-45, C
@Gusman yes we will talk tomorrow when we are all calmer. The boys really have enjoyed Cub Scouts since joining. But I feel like if the Den leader doesn't let Joel talk about downs syndrome we might not go back. I hope they do because they have really enjoyed going. And it would so wrong to let our youngest go with our his brother who is his best friend.
PatientlyWaiting25 · 46-50, F
I'm afraid I would absolutely handle it that way. I would be having some serious words with that den mother, from children, you expect it. They don't know any better until they learn but the den mother is there to try to educate them about how to treat people and if she doesn't know that, then it's up to you to explain how her comments made Joel and your children feel.
I've got three adopted children and one has additional needs too. Once, some kids had been targeting my son and they made up a rhyme "Your mum, your dad they swapped you for a fag... You're adopted" the school were doing nothing! My son was so distraught. Fury doesn't come close but oh you'd better believe I dealt with it!! Your children need to see that you will fight their corner no matter what the cost is. ❤
I've got three adopted children and one has additional needs too. Once, some kids had been targeting my son and they made up a rhyme "Your mum, your dad they swapped you for a fag... You're adopted" the school were doing nothing! My son was so distraught. Fury doesn't come close but oh you'd better believe I dealt with it!! Your children need to see that you will fight their corner no matter what the cost is. ❤
Cigarguy · 41-45, C
@PatientlyWaiting25 I am so sorry that happened to him. I wish bulling didn't have to be something we worry about along with all their other needs but it is
I’m so sorry my friend. This actually made me tear up. The world can be a cruel place and it’s awful that your two beautiful boys had to experience this.
I think a talk with the Den leader is in order to find a way to teach all the kids about bullying being wrong and the importance of kindness. They need to get a strong message that what happened was not okay and will not be tolerated.
In the meantime give lots of hugs to those boys, let them know how proud you are to be their parents and that you love them exactly as they are. ❤
I think a talk with the Den leader is in order to find a way to teach all the kids about bullying being wrong and the importance of kindness. They need to get a strong message that what happened was not okay and will not be tolerated.
In the meantime give lots of hugs to those boys, let them know how proud you are to be their parents and that you love them exactly as they are. ❤
Cigarguy · 41-45, C
@OlderSometimesWiser the world is cruel and it's so hard to keep him safe from all the mean things people say. It happens everywhere. We've actually had a person tell us they test for that before you give birth before.
Now that everyone is calm we plan on talking to the den leaders tomorrow.
The boys are calm now. We talked, we hugged and played Mario kart racing and even had s'mores tonight.
Now that everyone is calm we plan on talking to the den leaders tomorrow.
The boys are calm now. We talked, we hugged and played Mario kart racing and even had s'mores tonight.
4meAndyou · F
Den Mothers are human, and make horrible mistakes, it's true. But the way to handle is by contacting the Boy Scouts Council and asking THEM to contact the Den Mother.
My entire troop of Girl Scouts was kicked out of the girl scouts because the leaders did something that some of the girls perceived as wrong. One of the girls father was a lawyer, and he drew up a petition, and there was a LOT of pressure to sign it, BY the daughter and her friends.
The upshot was, we were ALL kicked out of the Girl Scouts by the Girl Scout Council for un-Girl Scoutly behavior. Except for the leaders two daughters.
One thing we have to realize, as human beings, is that not ALL human beings are evolved, and definitely not ALL human being are sensitive to the feelings of children.
My entire troop of Girl Scouts was kicked out of the girl scouts because the leaders did something that some of the girls perceived as wrong. One of the girls father was a lawyer, and he drew up a petition, and there was a LOT of pressure to sign it, BY the daughter and her friends.
The upshot was, we were ALL kicked out of the Girl Scouts by the Girl Scout Council for un-Girl Scoutly behavior. Except for the leaders two daughters.
One thing we have to realize, as human beings, is that not ALL human beings are evolved, and definitely not ALL human being are sensitive to the feelings of children.
Poppies · 61-69, F
I wonder if the Scouts have some national policy about things like this. Some training that the den mother should have received, some protocol to follow specifically in instances like this. I have no idea. Just wondering.
What would I have said if I had been that den mother? I don't know. Seems to me that something with the word Respect in it was called for.
What would I have said if I had been that den mother? I don't know. Seems to me that something with the word Respect in it was called for.
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Barefooter25 · 46-50, M
The Den mother handled that poorly. She should have told the other kids, especially that young boy that behavior and comment is unacceptable. He should have been made to apologize to your oldest boy, your tiny tornado and to Joel. Did the Den mother even offer an apology? Hopefully tomorrow, you and Joel can find a way to resolve this issue.
The scouts really changed. Why is there a Den mother in that scout troop? I thought only fathers were allowed to lead male cub scouts.
The scouts really changed. Why is there a Den mother in that scout troop? I thought only fathers were allowed to lead male cub scouts.
Levenrack · 46-50, M
Blind ignorance will do that, and yeah her in a leadership role should know better. It went from feathers to tungsten in less than a minute. Best to sleep on it, and address it tomorrow. Don't want to bust the tranquilizers out, which it sounds like Joel might need, if he walks out that door.... 🤭
Cigarguy · 41-45, C
@Levenrack you know we get the world is hard and cruel and we can't protect him from everything. We know he's going to get teased and made fun and called names. It's the sad truth of the world. And honestly I don't think Joel was even upset at what the other kid said, he was just saying what made him different, something that shouldn't of been asked in the first place I don't think but it was what the den leader said after that upset him. We're all calming down and playing Mario kart always cheers everyone up. We talk once the kids are in bed about what to do
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Cigarguy · 41-45, C
@ScreamingFox yes we're planning Mario kart with the family to cheer everyone up. They both really love going but Joel is worried this will happen again since nothing was done to redirect the kids or tell them how some of the words they used we're hurtful.
Musicman · 61-69, M
I am so sorry this happened to them. I'm sure she had no idea that was going to happen. Hopefully this will never happen again and she had a talk with the kids and their parents. Are the boys going to quit Scouts?
Cigarguy · 41-45, C
@Musicman if they refuse to left us do this we will look for another troop or some kind of activity they can do once a week. We have heard that a group might be starting a t ball league for both normal and special needs kids in April. The league will only be for family with both children. We are looking into it as well since they both love baseball so much
NativePortlander1970 · 51-55