WHAT a fabulous woman!!! An inspiration! I used to work in a nursing home, and I can tell you that it is a VERY dehumanizing experience for its residents.
It's like being in the army. You have NO CHOICES. You are forced to get out of bed at a certain time, and you are forced to GO to bed at a certain time. You are not allowed to have a glass of wine with dinner.
If you are in a wheelchair, and you have to go to the bathroom, (number 2), you have to sit there and WAIT for a CNA or a nurse to wheel you into the bathroom. If they are all busy, or if the owner hasn't hired enough people, you just have to sit in your own poop in public, in the middle of a crowd of other residents, until they have TIME for you.
You have to eat crappy cafeteria style food for the rest of your days. Only if you have family who actually CARE about you, will you EVER get to taste Chinese food...or a decent hamburger...again till you die.
If your family come to visit only on TUESDAY, the people who clean your room KNOW it, and they will begin to let the diapers pile up and stink in the bathroom every OTHER day of the week.
If your family doesn't have money, or if you are alone in the world, you will be limited to ONE diaper a day...two at the most...and the RASHES you will get are NEVER treated daily. It has to be so severe that you are sent to a DOCTOR before anyone will DO anything about it.
If you have a headache, you are not ALLOWED to take some tylenol on your own. No. A DOCTOR has to order it first. And then you have to sit there waiting and waiting with your head pounding while a nurse finishes every other task she has FIRST...and THEN she finally gets around to you.
You are FORCED to take part in GROUP activities, such as chair exercise. And if you happen to love your privacy and if you want to get away from the other residents...its NOT allowed. It's not considered to be healthy to isolate.
I've seen it. I've also seen a new resident MURDERED by the owner of the nursing home where I worked. She was an Alzheimer's sufferer...funny and VERY frisky...and she just happened to SLAP the owner on his butt while he was talking to her. He was HIGHLY offended...to the point of murder apparently. He called in her doctor and ordered that she be medicated into unconsciousness...and she was...and died within ONE week.
Oh...and if you happen to be unfortunate enough to be placed in hospice, your FAMILY gets to decide when you will die...and the hospice arranges it by refusing to give you any WATER. Which is murder.
I have a friend who honestly believes he will be better off in a nursing home...and I wish I could tell him what it is REALLY like.
