Day 44 and its an all time low.

@Peppa Why aren't you getting your sleep ?

@Picklebobble2 i have no idea i wee before bed but always wake up at around 1 and or 4am.
Then the alarm goes off at 6... I have no routine which is probably why.
Even yesterday i planned to iron then stick some vinyl on the window, i started but gave up ironing half way through.
My energy is so rubbish.
But this might be why

@Peppa Routine is a good one. Especially in times of stress. It gives you something you can rely on when everybody/thing else let's you down.

@Offthetop you know i thought there was but i just can't find a single thing.

My mum is trying to mask it ti nit appear cold but she's fed up of me. Shes said so herself...
She is a massive culprit to my low self esteem. And now i can't get away because i can't make friends anywhere else.
I feel like im walking with a dark cloud over my head.

[@there must be something that you cold pick off the list. What would a kind, generous friend say?

P.s. this is a time to act towards yourself as a kind, generous friend

@Offthetop my ex uses to say im in contact with people that are basically assholes. But he Turned out to be one too.

@JustGoneNow vice versa i think its unfortunate the kindest suffer

@Peppa Yeah. 🖤🤗

@Peppa Saying what, you're weird or no one likes you?

@Baybreeze things will get better, you'll find youre pwople your tribe whatever.
Everytime i make what i think are beginning stages of a friendship someone wades in and ruins it. They then scarper for fear of being treated the same.

@Peppa I feel the same way..it sucks some days..it seems no one WANTS new friends too sometimes.😕 But there's got to be SOMEONE out there. 🤗

@SW-User i dont know if you've seen my art here, she said its too small. Im in danger of reperpetrating stereotypical images of black people. Although i have potential she basically told me artists to look up and said their art is something i should work more towards.
barbara walker
wangechi

@Peppa I am not sure if I've seen your work. But I think I did.



let me ask you this what type of art do you want to do? what goals do you what to accomplish with your work? cause it sounds like your instructor is pushing towards a direction where you don't want to go with your work. Do you want to draw more realistic, more cartoony or what? The two examples are two differents styles. So idk what direction she is trying to push you in persay. this is just my opinion. Sometimes art instructors can suck the life and creativity out of you and others are very inspirational, and then others are meh.

Nonethless, having the basic fundamentals of art down is very beneficial such as colors, proportions, perspective, composition etc.

@SW-User i am tired of seeing art of black people in abstract form or in the background. Although ive been advised to use my art for change why do i also have to focus on the negatives. Gun crime etc. I have no association with people like that. Anyone that was like that i moved away from. I know nothing of it.
I want to make positive images and tell of stories that are successes like my grandparents etc.

@SW-User i wish this was some pseudo situation but no it's very real. And i could just jump in front of a train on my way to work or something.

@Peppa are you calling my situations pseudo? really?

@SW-User everytime we talk you know you misunderstand me. Every single time!