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18

atlantic59

61-69, M

Canada

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4672 views · 110 followers · Online: See Last Online »

A drifter whose drifted too far from shore

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I'm thinking of having a small table top surgically attached to the top of my head

Not only would iit cover my bald spot but I could finally be of service to tall girls I like

Even though my dogs run wild, I have tried to set down rules for them :

-if you are gonna bring home a wild girl, can you try n bring home a nice one this time

I finally find the girl I want and, get this: she tells me she's from a different planet

I've already had anxieties about travel and now this

gotta love the ancestry site I hired

-my dna has been traced back to a barnacle found on the hull of Noah's Arc

When I go to Meet my Maker:

He will tell me that it was Me who made all the bad parts

What does 'Make Love' mean?

How do you 'make' Love? Isn't it there or not on it's own? Is it made with a special tool or something?

I've never been on a real date. Cause the nervousness and shyness prevented me from asking.

So I've spent my whole life with women who picked me up at a bar or the work place and took me home for years, weeks or half a night. I really don't think I'm living the way I'm supposed to. I'm not complaining, just reflecting on how it could have... See More »

I was never in love. I was just high...

How do I find out what's going on around here? Why has the recent activity board been taken away from me?

I feel the pain of being back in high school and nobody tells me where the party is on friday

Have you ever phoned 911 by accident. And then tell the arriving cops it was a mistake

I've done it twice. I dialed directory assistance wrong but the cops still have to show up and check the whole house to make sure the bad guys didn't tell you to call them off and say you dialed wrong.

Mosquitos are here to prove that all beauty still is tempered

first impressions

I wonder how many potentially good encounters are thwarted by a bad opening line and the inability to respond to the other's far more clever response. Another example to be prepared before you open your mouth...unless you are so hot it doesn't matter

I wonder how many autocrats, despots or pesidents whine to their wives like little boys?

Are there swap shops where you can take a significant other that no longer fits your philosophy or peace of mind

Everyone is right for someone and I believe in recycling and the trade system.. And I want her to find a better home where she could yell and complain at someone else and allow me to explore the freedom of Peace.. -and it is swap meet, yard sale... See More »

If I smoke this legal pot from a government regulated facility.

Csn I be absolved from my actions, ie: 'wanting to love strangers '?

I wonder what they mean by the expression: 'too old to cut the mustard'?

I bought a jar of spicy Dijon and after a little struggle with the lid I can scoop it out just fine

I'm All Washed Up!

...no more blood on my hands anymore

Why do people still have kids when they should know already that they will grow up to be adults?

And probably be someone's difficult co-worker or neighbor?

Everybody needs to die except the chosen few

Everybody needs to die Except the chosen few; What can I say I've realized -The Chosen aren't me or you

I just advertised on Facebook that I was looking for a sigle room for two difficult dogs and one problem human.

I hoped for a place in the country away from others for 800 a month. Now I wonder if that's not enough but my pension only gives me 1200 and I really only need a sink, a hot plate and a toilet.

When the answers were easy to be unemployed:

no no no yes yes no

It's hard to channel your inner-self when there"s a big dog sleeping on the remote

When I was young and good looking, people used to pick me up hitch-hiking

Now I swear, they swerve To try and run me over

I believe I'm still lost

anybody know the way to San Jose?

You finally find the woman of your dreams..

and then you wake up..

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