I Have Relationship Problems

Don't listen to Gecko 😝👊;)

Gecko 🙄

I understand the need to fix and make it better or different...especially when you want one thing and the other person wants another...you feel like you could have done something differently and if they just give you the chance you can fix it. ...but, let me give you some advice from experience: it never works. They only get farther away and colder. They run ....we are made into the crazy people because they cannot handle that we have been hurt and might need some extra sympathy or time to grasp.

The end of a relationship is never quite that simple. The one who ends it wants to move on and go forward before the one who is left is able to grasp and accept...both have valid feelngs ...but only one gets turned into the crazy one ...

As hard as it is, you have to stop. It will only make you craziet and more hurt. You have to distract yourself..find someone else to listen to.everything you have to say...write it all down in a letter and store it away....just stop calling and texting. Give it time and space and maybe in time he will be willing to hear you out...but you cannot keep doing this to yourself.

Pill is 100% right (and said it in a much less callous way than I did). In a break up, one person has had the time to work through their feelings already while the other has not.

Ugh it feels like a catch 22 when that happens..feeling out of control..the ball
Is in his park I'm afraid..I feel for you.

Try to keep busy...distractions are your friend 🤗

I hope you can. Based on what you let us know, that really seems to go against your nature so hopefully you can use this as a chance to maybe do some inner soul cleansing. If his issue was you being suffocating, then maybe all he needs to see is that you aren't that.

It is true, Ican. But knowing we have all been there, I know the only truth is not a single piece of advice we give will be listened to. It will be heard and even agree'd with, but in the end, the urge gives in to call and/or text.

We all know the real answer is that just add's to the smothering feeling he probably already has and the best thing she can do, for both of them, is to act as if this isn't a big deal. She even knows this. But a hurt heart is going to do what it is already doing... not let go.

We have known each other for 8 years and dating for 3 years. The reason is because I lost the trust because I get upset when he doesnt call or text and i think that hes talking to someone else. He says hes just busy at work thats why he doesnt call/text. He also says that i always need reassurance that he loves me and it shouldnt be that way. He could be right but I just dont see it. I know I should probably give him some space but Im afraid that if I do he wont talk to me anymore.

Thankyou everyone. I will take your advice and give him some space and try to keep myself distracted.

The best advice for getting over any bloke....is getting under another one (tried and tested and yep it worked).

Babygirl : my apologies for the insensitive post. I didn't realise he broke up with you today or more recently. Am sorry and regret my comments.

@JLP : yes it was insensitive of me. My apologies and thanks for pointing it out. I guess I responded in that manner cause I experienced some real bad shit for months with an ex 6 years ago. Doesn't justify my comments still.

Ican / Angel..... I can't help it!! I try not to but the urge always wins out :P

Move on..just let him go..lmfao..clearly it is so easy and simple. God, wish we could all be like that..wouldn't life be so much better if we just didnt have any feelings at all?

Pill, you are right and Ican was correct in that my response was not what was needed. But she does know what to do, she just doesn't want to do it. When she gets to that point, then people can be there to help. It will be a tough road unto then but she will get there.

Babygirl, how long did you two date? And what was his reason for leaving?

I think she's serious :?

We've all been there 💔

I know exactly what you're going through, so sorry to hear about that :(
I did the same and i kinda wish i hadn't now in hindsight, the best thing you can do is just give yourself and them some space to get back to yourselves and clear your heads.
I know it's hard though..hope your okay and try to keep your mind occupied.

I know all about your urges 😳 😈

This is the worst thing to do. Have experienced this and it's as bad as stalking. It's not going to do any good and your boyfriend probably already detests it. Sorry for being blunt but move on with your life.. Will do you a world of good.

I can relate to this im going through someone close to me she moved on and my advice you cant really do that eventually it could be considered harassment and you could get in a lot of trouble you should wait to hear from him

Well I was going to be supportive but now I think it's been a year. I think I'm the only one who still is usually obsessed after that length of time :p
I hope all is well! Relationships are hard!

Keep calling and texting as much as you can... he will come around. I have faith

If you just relax and give him time he may realize he misses you and call you... it's really the only hope.

What usually helps you when you're upset?

Let it go..

Think about dating his friend

I can already diagnose this. You may not realize you're doing this, but you sound controlling. I had to end a relationship for the same reason. Constant calling/texting/needing to know where someone is sounds like a HUGE trust issue, and those are real killers. Best thing you can do is BACK OFF. You cannot truly control anyone, and why the f would you want to? Being out of touch is the only way he will become interested again(yes, it is the opposite of what you think, but it works)

And @Big...your comment really proves what I have said. ...you just made her into a stalker. The breakup happened..today...so all of the sudden now that he has ended it and she is having a hard time she is as bad as a stalker?! Lol. Jesus christ ..does anyone have sympathy left these days? Anyone at all?

I have been told those same things. There are men out there who will care enough for you to look past those flaws and reassure you. That is what they are supposed to do ..most are incapable or feel that it is a nuisance or too much work.

He feels suffocated and space is what you need to give him or you will lose the battle all together.