Do u believe that being a nice person will get u stepped on ? ✨🤔✨ 🥾
Greetings ladies and gentlemen. Sit down for a minute. Mr [b]Z[/b] wants to talk to you about something important. It's called being [b]nice. [/b] How many of you here have been too[b] nice [/b] to people only to be stepped on and forgotten. Maybe you have been [b]overlooked[/b] or [b]taken advantage of[/b] simply for being [b]nice. [/b] You thought that the person would at least be considerate because of your [b] generosity.[/b] But it turned out to be the exact opposite. How does that make you feel ? To know that you did all of that for nothing. It was all done in [b]vain. [/b] And now perhaps you trust noone because you have been let down so many times. You're [b]numb.[/b] You're [b]guarded.[/b] And you just don't care anymore. How many of you here can relate to what I am saying here today . This post has been inspired by [b]Nerdy Potato [/b] 🥔. Are you tired of being [b]nice.[/b] Best answer wins. 🙂✨✨
Some people think being nice is a weakness. Some take advantage of nice people for sure. Im 'nice'. But, im more gaurded than i once was regaurding who i spend time being nice to.
Nice people are often codependent and have other issues than "just being nice" that attracts bad intentioned people in their lives. So I would say that being nice in by itself doesn't make one stepped on but the lack of establishing boundaries and a bunch of other important factors that are in play. It's not always like this, there are also "nice but manipulative" people as well in which their niceness is a cover for exploitative behavior so nice doesn't always mean benevolent.
So my opinion is that I would say that being nice is needed in a world that is just so dark with so much anger because I don't think it's healthy being either super nice/passive or super mean/violent. Both of those are extremes that kind of attract bad things in ones life due to the energy imbalance.
The problem with "nice" people is that the super nice people are usually the ones who either can't say no, establish boundaries or don't really know people all that well. There's often underlying issues like trauma, codependency, bad environmental dynamics and also not really having the chance to have an identity in the first place to get that firm grasp on things.
I believe that being nice is needed but also I equally believe that establishing boundaries, working through trauma, learning to know/trust yourself rather than others and learning when to let go basically solves this issue. It's more of a holistic approach.
There are always those who will take advantage of kindness, yes. Who will think “nice” equals “weak.” But I know who and what I am, and I know how to stand up when I need to. I also know doing that does not mean I have to be angry or numb or guarded or rob myself of the pleasure of good people just because I’ve met bad ones. I am nice because I believe that’s what we should be. I’m not going to change my beliefs because it hurts sometimes. That’s just part of life. 🤷♀️
[b]Its who I am in God.[/b] Through they're many times I've could have used the opportunity to exact mental punishment on people, I [b]choose[/b] not to.
Sometime ago I let the enemy get the best of me. I was so brutal that the person ended up leaving SW soon after! I felt bad because thats not me. Have I learned, I pray I have.
I [b]choose[/b] not to be tormented by these people and live a happy life. I remind myself that no matter the person, good or bad we are all Gods children.
They chose their path thinking it'll make them feel better about themselves and gives them self-worth. Little do they know its a path of destruction. Which I myself have been there, vulgar, angry, destructive, lonely and violent.
I will admit being a nice person has caused others to feel they can take advantage of that trait. However I would never change it, I do not stress about things and I embrace my positivity.
Ahhh, this is something i have spent years deliberating over.
I was brought up on basic christian values, and being the youngest prolly developed a bit of a co- dependent personality to feel valued and noticed.
Long story short, i learnt: ' you can give too much of yourself, that it becomes the only way you value yourself' ....and how others value you as well.
I also learnt that when we give so much, we kind of expect others to give a bit back. And theres the rub....you can become resentful when they dont .
So i practised being selfish, saying no, etc. But i didn't like that either. I started becoming someone i didnt like.
As much as i feel ive been taken for granted in my life, i also accept part of the blame for allowing it to happen, over and over again.
As with all things , its a balance of : caring for others, but also caring for ones self.
Ultimately, in the end , i decided i prefer to be giving, to help, to do stuff for people - its my nature, and its kind. But i am more careful now [i]how[/i] much i give, what my boundries are, and have a shorter 'giving window'. Also, try to make sure when i give, i do it with no expectation.
Plus, ive learnt to ask for help if i need it, elimiate expectations of perfectionism.....and try to learn to do things [i]for me[/i].
The hardest thing to accept was, i got walked over becuase i allowed it.
@OogieBoogie There's a balance. Just be cautious. Use your intuition. Love yourself. And give only to those who have earned your trust. Happy Holidays.⛄⛄⛄
Many of us have so many scars in and out and all these were caused by those we once called friends and those we found needy and gave a helping hand but guess what, this does not stop us from being nice and kind. A nice person will always be nice no matter what.
@Bally One must use [b] discernment [/b] at all times. It is ok to say [b]no.[/b] It is ok to use a [b]firm[/b] hand. You do not have to be a victim of users, takers, manipulators, and abusers.
There is no harm in maintaining good manners in the face of rudeness.. If your belief in yourself is strong hurtful words mean nothing and bounce off. And if you must take some form of vengeance, let it be that the uncouth person demonstrated his or her inferiority publicly far better than you could have proved it in a reply.. 😷Live Long & Prosper..
@Zonuss Thats true.. But I also feel something for those here who feel so inadequate as to have to try to crush others to prop up their own egos. What damaged them to become who they are??😷
You can be nice without getting stepped on. You can treat others well without being taken advantage of. We all have to be aware of what's going on around us and let everyone know (who matters) that your good will is not a source of weakness.
[quote]Mr Z wants to talk to you about something important. It's called being nice. How many of you here have been too nice to people only to be stepped on and forgotten[/quote]
You step on my comments quite often. You will no doubt find reason to be dismissive of this too.
Yes, it is tiresome. And, I wonder what it will take for some to learn about being civil to one another.
Ive had my ass kicked alot. Alot of people just think we are stupid. Well they are so wrong. This is why i have no friends now. Just a bunch of dummies.Life is hard .
@Zonuss i had to get away from the people that i knew. They were never friends. I aint stupid. Why should i be treated that way? Screw them. Im better off.life is pretty lonely though.I sjould have died when i was supposed to.
Personally, I'm a very gentle and friendly but staunchly assertive gentleman, and teach hand to hand combat for fun, so I have my ways of handling unpleasant situations, mostly enhanced negotiation so to speak, or rather they try to hit and you block and don't get hit at all and make it clear you could kill them easily and they should stop, it works well.
I've had situations of people trying to stab me with a knife and threatening to and gun threats and a gun pointed at my head more than once, the world isn't as gentle a place as Mr Rogers neighborhood makes it seem like
@Zonuss i am always nice and always get pushed back. My current job just got a new supervisor now I have run the department without a supervisor for the last year and a half. She told me at the first of the year i will be knocked back to part time and will have to take a 20% pay cut. The person who put her in charge she came up with the idea of changing my hours and my pay so she could get a $15,000 pay increase. I told her i dont think that is fair. She said it is what it is. The sr vp told me he know and dont worry we will move you departments. So i am mot sure what is going on yet but i know she doesn't know 10% of the stuff i do.
@Zonuss well some do but but i will know more in 3 weeks i have heard they are making a different job and the new mgr of the department i am in will be stuck with it all on her own.
