Upset
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Do I have every right to be angry at my family for not standing up for me?

One time one of my cousins (let’s call her Val) screamed at me for being “lazy” and “unrealizable” for sitting around. We were all busy putting up stuff and helping this past week. We were all sitting down and resting. Val kept putting stuff away and she glared at us and said, “Why the hell am I the only still doing this. LAYLA GET YOUR FAT A** UP AND HELP ME! YOU ALWAYS HELP PEOPLE SO I EXPECT YOU TO GET YOU F*CKING LAZY ASS UP AND HELP ME!!!! RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!” Shoved me and walked off angrily. She got into my face. She only yelled at me and not my two other cousins and aunt. Then she said, “Your daddy is dead so this time he isn’t here to save you. He’s DEAD. Get used to it!” They were like, “DAMN!!” None of them stood up for me! They just say there and shrugged at me.
I got upset and said, “Why did you guys just sit there and let her yell at me like that.”
One of my three cousins said, “Why did YOU let Val talk to you like that? We thought you were going to say something but you didn’t. Everyone try to help you to get you to stand up for yourself but you refused to do it so you must LOVE being treated this way.”
My aunt said, “He’s right. You let it happen. That’s on YOU. You’re an adult woman. If you were a child that would’ve been different but you’re an ADULT. You shouldn’t have let that happen. That’s your fault.”
I just couldn’t believe what they said. I thought family helped each other out.
I’m so angry at them for letting it happen and Val never apologized for yelling at me. I still resent her and she’s close to my half sister’s age (37). My sister is 35.
My late dad would have cussed my cousin out for treating me that say.
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ProfessorPlum77 · 70-79, MVIP
Your cousins seem to pick on you pretty often. If I were you, I would stop hanging out with them. Or, report them to the authorities when they DO physically assault you, like the incident you mentioned above. If someone pushes you, as you described, call 911 and report it. They will arrest the person who has done that.
LaylaTheTallGirl · 22-25, F
@ProfessorPlum77 She didn’t shove me that hard. All so I wish that my family would stand up for me more. I don’t hang out around them anymore because I’m so sick and tired of them treating me like crap. Some of my cousins used to bully me when I was younger really bad.
ProfessorPlum77 · 70-79, MVIP
@LaylaTheTallGirl 1. if she pushed you at all, that is an assault.
2. COMPLETELY avoid your cousins until they start to treat you better.
3. Do not focus on your family "not standing up" for you. YOU have to stand up for yourself. Do it by avoiding them as much as possible and reporting them when they abuse you.