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reflectingmonkey · 51-55, M
the end of dichotomy of sex roles and financial independence. in the past couples actually NEEDED each other to survive. a man could not survive alone and a woman could not survive alone because the man couldn't take care of kids and cook and the woman couldn't hunt, build houses or protect herself. in that situation they both had better try hard to make it work because separation was not an option. today both have jobs, police exists so no need to be protected, both know how to cook or can easily learn, both men and women share the tasks related to taking care of kids etc. so the second things get complicated they separate, and why wouldn't they? I got an apartment, money, I can cook etc if things get complicated in a relationship its easy to come to the conclusion that being alone would be better than this.
Sepia · 36-40, F
@reflectingmonkey true..I heard this. "I can cook, I can work, watch tv all day, I used to buy women, go home go out whenever I want. I was born without you, You became you before me, before we met." 🤨 realising why staying only to tell me this in the middle of discomfort..
Sepia · 36-40, F
Only the two people in marriage knows it..within partnership, within four walls of their room. Esp when one or both cannot compromise or overcome the obstacle aka "differences". I haven't decide to marry my partner..I am willing to change my last name only with sincerity, assurance..Keeping it perhaps there is something beyond my knowledge.
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@Sepia
I believe that, I really do.
Edit: She shared with me that I was just like her dad and that her mother never respected him hence the compromised foundation.
I believe that, I really do.
Edit: She shared with me that I was just like her dad and that her mother never respected him hence the compromised foundation.
Tminus6453 · M
SW-User
@Tminus6453 good answer!
saragoodtimes · F
Keepitsimple · 51-55, F
Keepitsimple · 51-55, F
Me too! I denied things I knew and found out things after. Stack on the other stressers and it’s all but over.@SageWanderer
SageWanderer · 70-79, M
@Keepitsimple Some of the stuff I found out later and thought where was my head?
Keepitsimple · 51-55, F
☹️@SageWanderer
CharlieZ · 70-79, M
Most of people get married for the wrong reasons, stay married for different but also wrong ones, and end divorcing because those reasons were both wrong.
The few relationships that put the copuple above the institution, the content above the jarr, do not only stay together: they have good reasons for it.
The few relationships that put the copuple above the institution, the content above the jarr, do not only stay together: they have good reasons for it.
DragonFruit · 61-69, M
ravenwind43 · 51-55, F
Tastyfrzz · 61-69, M
@ravenwind43 we got married at age 22. It seemed like it was actually going pretty good but she suddenly had a mental breakdown over being sexually abused by her older brother as a child. It was the first I'd heard of it. Her family denied it at first but eventually admitted to it. Things got really weird and she went on antipsychotic medications.
Some only worked for a short time. There were lots of counseling sessions on how to deal with it. ACA meetings, and a mens group. She started questioning her sexuality. She started living with her coworker.
Eventually She said she needed space so we divorced and she left us and went to California for several years. I was going nuts trying to work and be a single dad. Luckily I got a pretty good support system. Mostly other single moms at church and scouts who had kids my son's age that he was friends with.
Some only worked for a short time. There were lots of counseling sessions on how to deal with it. ACA meetings, and a mens group. She started questioning her sexuality. She started living with her coworker.
Eventually She said she needed space so we divorced and she left us and went to California for several years. I was going nuts trying to work and be a single dad. Luckily I got a pretty good support system. Mostly other single moms at church and scouts who had kids my son's age that he was friends with.
ravenwind43 · 51-55, F
@Tastyfrzz Wow I am sorry but glad to hear you had a good support system. My (at some point ex) has severe depression and has deteriorated over the years. I stayed much longer than I should have.
Sepia · 36-40, F
@SW-User thinking about my partner gets upset when I don't make his coffee..
Tastyfrzz · 61-69, M
Ours was damaged before we were married by her brother's repeated sexual abuse, her father being a religious zealot and her mother being a drug addict. When she was finally able to settle down in a calm environment it all came out!
PhoenixPhail · M
Many people aren't willing to take an honest look at themselves and see they were wrong somewhere. They would rather be right than work things out with their partner.
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saragoodtimes · F
most of the time the idiot doesn't realize what he's got at home. many come to their senses before there is irreparable damage
SW-User
So many reasons! Marriage is for real men and women that are committed!
Tastyfrzz · 61-69, M
@SW-User there are two definitions of committed. Based on my experience it's probably the second one.
GoldenWorm · 51-55, M
Economic stress, lack of communication and different expectations all play a part.
PhillyPhill · 31-35, M
Lack of communication
SkeetSkeet · 100+, F
They weren't arranged
SW-User
@SkeetSkeet 🙄