I lost myself in grief.

I can't see a pretty face on me anymore. I hate my white hair. I look so ugly in the mirror. No smile on my face. I can see a sad face in the mirror. I lost my sense of humour and confidence. I cry everyday.
I don't put on heavy makeup anymore because I lost my art creativity. I lost myself in grief.

However, I haven't lost my voice to sing. My voice can hit a high note especially singing Linkin Park songs where it is incredible for me because I was previously not able to sing high notes.
My vocal is getting better and better by practicing Teddy Swims songs.