This post may contain Mildly Adult content.
Mildly AdultUpdate
Only logged in members can reply and interact with the post.
Join SimilarWorlds for FREE »

Why I don't date/talk to conservatives

• I don't want to deal with people who can't step outside their own existence and experiences to understand what others go through, but feel that they are the authority on how other people live and try to survive.

• I don't want to talk to people who are willing to throw away the rights of others for their own needs and wants. If they are willing to thoughtlessly vote to remove rights of others, that says they aren't someone worth valuing because they won't value me.

• I don't want to be the most intelligent person in the relationship. I don't want to spend hour after frustrating hour trying to explain to someone who has no desire to grow on how their point of view is narrow, biased, racist, misogynistic, etc. If I want that, I can literally post a comment on some raging right wing nut job and feel fulfilled without having to deal with them on the daily.

• I don't want to be around someone who says things like, "We've always been a violent society", "We've always had a society based on me", "Violence and war are just a part of human nature", etc, as if none of these things can't be changed when they absolutely can be, except it is easier to believe these extremely horrible ideologies instead of actually doing the work on themselves to learn better ways to manage anger and cope with pain.

• I don't want to be with someone who doesn't understand gender is a concept and is not a rule of biology. If a person can't be bothered to read actual science journals that explain that, I'm not required to explain it and won't.

• I don't want to be exposed to hateful rhetoric and beliefs. The world is already shitty enough to have to spend time with someone who really doesn't care how their views directly hurt other people and usually feel proud that they do.

• I don't want to be around someone who has allowed misinformation and propaganda to infect their brain.

• I don't want to be around someone who is unable to be self-aware and willing to consider changing themselves when opposite information is presented.

• I don't want to be around someone who literally has no compassion, empathy or care for people who are not a part of their life.

Basically, it boils down to, if you can't think logically and critically to current events, if you aren't willing to see the world from various perspectives while being respectful and understanding of other people, their lives, their experiences and how systems have been set in place to keep them down that your votes have allowed to continue, I am not at all required to acknowledge your existence or your presence.

There's a valid reason you are being rejected. That reason is you.
Top | New | Old
This message was deleted by the author of the main post.
FoxyQueen · 51-55, F
@Pherick I am impressed you are trying to have a reasonable debate with this person. I've already blocked them though, so if you do wish to continue the conversation, you will need to go to them
Pherick · 41-45, M
@FoxyQueen sometimes I don't know why I do either .... I am either a glutton for punishment, or just have hope for the human spirit :)
FoxyQueen · 51-55, F
@Pherick I get that. I used to do that too, but honestly, they aren't here for honest discourse.

I've already deleted and blocked 3 men who said that I was hateful because I want partners and friends who share the same values as me, have compassion, empathy and the ability to understand people and situations who are not themselves. The fact they say these things are hateful tells me (and everyone else who reads this) exactly who they are. Someone I don't need to provide a stage to.
TinyViolins · 31-35, M
Yeah, I'm in a similar boat with regards to who I choose to have conversations with on here. To be fair, there are a few moderate conservatives who are genuine folk that care about people and the future of their country. I'm fine talking to honest people even if we can't agree on certain topics.

My problem is that the overwhelming majority of conservatives here are as you described. Aggressively vile people with a complete lack of critical thinking skills or empathy for those who aren't on their side. I'm aware that there are a number of liberals who exhibit a similar toxic fanaticism, but I usually mute them too so I don't see it as much.

I'm at the point where I just block the moment they start attacking because I already know they'll refuse to be reasonable. I've got better things to do than to try to argue with idiots
Pherick · 41-45, M
@TinyViolins Oh yea, there are people on both sides who just have no critical thinking skills and couldn't figure out how to do basic research if their life depended on it. I think the difference is volume, or atleast vocal volume?

Those on the right like this seem to make up like 80% of the conservatives out there. While the on the left its 15%. Maybe the left has more, maybe I don't hang out in the spaces they do, but apparently in terms of voting, there are more of the conservatives.
TinyViolins · 31-35, M
@Pherick In my experience, there is a stark difference between those who are genuinely ignorant and those who are willfully ignorant. It's pretty easy to spot because the latter chooses to get defensive when confronted with evidence that contradicts their biases. The former at least tries to reconcile this new information with their beliefs.

I'm all for having a sense of skepticism in a debate, but when these people cling to skepticism at all costs, it's obvious they're arguing in bad faith. Most of the conservatives I've talked to are motivated entirely by their cynicism and will try to drag anyone they can down to their level. Talking to them is fruitless

Liberals often go about things in a foolish manner as well, but I've found them to be far less repugnant when handling disagreements and a lot more willing to present evidence supporting their beliefs
Pherick · 41-45, M
@TinyViolins Oh agreed. and honestly in my personal life, thats the difference with people I want to spend time with. We don't have to agree on everything, but if you believe something and I disagree lets talk about it.

If that talks leads me to presenting facts, sources, etc and all you can do is put your finger in your ears and yell "NOOOO" or start calling me a "Poopyhead" ... then I think our friendship was done before it really got going :)
I am not much into politics anymore but I do have to say that it goes both ways on many of your points. I mean you literally state you don't want to deal with someone who isn't willing to see other perspectives but based upon your statement you are not willing to see others perspectives either (if they are conservative). Just food for thought. I know my opinion won't change anything.
FoxyQueen · 51-55, F
@istillhaveanameitsrick That's a fair statement. Let me just say, from multiple experiences in discourse, both online and in person (i live in heavy trump country), I do actually understand their perspectives. The "changes" they are being asked to make are uncomfortable, not logical, beyond their scope of learning. They aren't open to learning other points of view because it requires a certain amount of personal accountability that makes them uncomfortable.

Most of them become aggressive, bullying, mocking, etc, when presented with ither points of view for a variety of reasons, most of them due to immature response mechanisms. They haven't learned how to be any other wayand when they have others who are willing to dogpile, they receive confirmation that their ideas, beliefs and feelings are okay and correct.

I am not the person who is here to show them better ways. I am not the person who is going to help them see things from other perspectives. I'm okay with that and to keep my own peace, I simply don't.
Pherick · 41-45, M
Was just talking about this to some friends of mine. A lady in our friend circle, who is a liberal/Democrat leaning, married a guy a few years ago who is a Republican. Like an active member of their local Republican party, serves in the local Republican conference, etc. Not just the average voter. Now I don't know if he is MAGA or a trumper, but man I have no idea how she stays married to him.

It just seems like it would be such a gap in styles and lifestyle choices.
FoxyQueen · 51-55, F
@Pherick I don't know how that could work out either.
This comment is hidden. Show Comment
FoxyQueen · 51-55, F
@Mjay5150 that still doesn't say they were getting benefits. That says they used documents to get a job that had taxes taken out that they weren't getting benefits for. Also, most business owners are conservative, so they are more likely to say things in support of current incorrect rhetoric.

The raids are illegal. The courts have said they are illegal. The administration refuses to follow the law or the courts.
FoxyQueen · 51-55, F
@Mjay5150 Also, if the owner knew the documents were fake, why did he still hire them? He broke immigration laws, a federal offense by doing so. Why would he admit that and incriminate himself?

You seem to like to take things you hear and see at face value without applying logic and facts to them. Your arguments here are no different than any other discussion I have had with conservatives and right wingers. They repeat what they hear but seemed to have never questioned these things, when there are a ton of things to question. And when they get questioned, they bring up some irrelevant tangent thing, like your wife, what you saw, the raids, etc. None of these prove your claims and actually weaken them to those who actually understand how laws and regulations work in the government.
Northwest · M
@Mjay5150

You:

You assume right out the gate I met her at a club.

Me:

All kidding aside

You:

You right tho conservatives and liberal don’t have anything in common.

You might be right. For instance, I have a sense of humor.

But back to the issue I raised:

You realize that social security numbers are unique, and anyone using a "fake" social security number, cannot apply for benefits, right?
luckranger71 · 51-55, M
Love it. Very well stated!
PalteseMalconFunch · 36-40, T
I can’t deal with it either. It drives me crazy.
This is spot on!
pdockal · 56-60, M
Maybe they don't want to talk to you ?
This comment is hidden. Show Comment
Mjay5150 · 51-55, MNew
@pdockal I was just trying to have a positive conversation.
I guess that’s not gonna happen.
FoxyQueen · 51-55, F
@Mjay5150 You were having a conversation based on zero facts, just heresay. Claiming people are criminals without actual facts isn't a positive conversation.

Also, the original commentor has been blocked, so they won't see this.

And nice try at trying to rally up support.
Elisbch · M
TheShanachie · 61-69, M
They would have so little in common with me it would be ridiculous.
FoxyQueen · 51-55, F
@TheShanachie Honestly, I have one conservative friend who is actually a liberal but doesn't know it yet. We have things in common that we talk about, but we refrain from politics. He is one of those conservatives who doesn't know why they are except that everyone in their lives has been and hasn't had the desire to look beyond that.

Like one day, he was talking about how states should have death with dignity laws. I told him that they don't because of conservatives. He vehemently disagreed till I pulled up the election results of his state where conswrvatives shot down the death with dignity proposal fairly overwhelmingly.

A lot of them may be good people, but they truly have no clue what exactly what they vote for.
TheShanachie · 61-69, M
@FoxyQueen you make a good point here!

 
Post Comment