The great dilemma....I don't want to have children?

Are you sure the economy is the reason you feel this way?

In my experience, children are not expensive. They need our love, and practical things like food, clothing, and shelter. We are supposed to breastfeed our babies when born. At 4–6 months, you can start giving them food as well. My babies were all big, as their father is big, and I am healthy. When they have food, it is only small portions. They do not have bigger portions until they get older. I assume you already have shelter? Clothes for children are not expensive.

The next things are books and toys. Do children need lots of toys? They want to be playing with you; they are interested in you. College isn't necessary unless they are intelligent enough to study a worthwhile subject. It is unfortunate that jobs now often require degrees, but maybe they are jobs your children do not want to be doing. I am going to have the money to always look after my children. I don't care about money for myself, but I also don't want my children to feel like they have to participate in this sham world. It doesn't bother me if they don't go to college or get a good job, as long as they know about the things they need to know about. I will teach them everything I can. Their happiness is what matters.

The sad reality is that people are selfish and do not want to share their lives with their offspring.

No kids unless he can provide for them. Has he started creating a savings acc for future kids? Has he made any investment acc? If he isn't understanding the financial concerns you have, seems like he wants to just breed or at the very least, just not thinking it through. A lot of men (my husband included) say they want a big family but just aren't ready or in the place for it. If your financial situation was different would u want kids or is it still a no? Honestly if u really love him you could make it work but be honest with urself, if u don't want kids at all then from an outside perspective then you guys aren't compatible

If you don't want to have children, that's your decision to make. Your boyfriend has to decide if that's a deal breaker for him, just as you have to decide if his wanting to have children is a deal breaker for you.

These are important decisions, not to be taken lightly. I hope things work out well for you, whatever you do.

If it's about finances, then I agree with your decision. No reason to bring kids up an increasingly material world, without the means to go all the way. all they way through college.

I don't mean make spoil them rotten, but be able to give them what the average kids have today.

It's a shared responsibility, and it may sound harsh, but "we will figure out as we go", is not a substitute fro reality.

I think you're not alone with those thoughts. While some people who feel like it's hard to raise kids financially would have them and rely on handouts for help, others feel like if they can't provide well, then maybe they need to wait, have fewer kids, or whatever. It's sad that you might lose a relationship over this, but I suspect knowing in advance is better than getting to that point and then having the problem. At least you're discussing it now.

Sometimes in this type of situation never give up . You want to have kids then do what will be best for them . Get a better paying job to bring in more money . Both your bf and you will have to both work . When you want to settle down think about small then move up in life . This is just a challenge you have to defeat to move forward .

Many people feel the same way

I'm sorry to hear about you situation, but you shouldn't change for anyone. If you do have children against your will, you'd hold resentment forever and even possibly resent the children. And they feel everything.

Have you ever told him before that you dont want kids at all? Because if you suddenly decided you dont want kids then its just unfair to him.

If that's your only reason for not having kids, he needs to stop arguing and make more money. Maybe you can salvage the relationship after.

I don't want to have kids either. I would essentially bankrupt myself lol

You cannot keep your man deprived of having babies.

I made a conscious decision when I was about 20 years old that I would forgo parenting in this lifetime of mine, only because I realized that I would only be repeating a continuously repeating cycle which predominated my family's history, where nobody really got to do what they really wanted to do in their lifetime because their kids were always their first priority which they should be anyway once you have the first one.

This time around however, it's all about me and I've never looked back!

Yeah I couldn’t see how things would work out between you 2, when you both want different things