What's the drunkest you've ever been?
Mine was when I went out on foot to meet a hooker on a Christmas Eve, after an afternoon's drinking. When I got there her madam turned me away due to my state. I kept drinking all the way back, at one point falling on my face. After I apparently crossed an intersection dangerously and my erratic gait obviously attracted attention, two cops questioned me. When I admitted to intoxication and handed out my hip-flask to demonstrate, the cop said "that's an umbrella."