If you have ever done something you feel shame about

You look ahead and not back
Only to learn from it ♥

I have done a lot of thinking about shame.

Terry Bradshaw has a book called 'Healing the Shame That Binds You", in which he distinguishes between healthy shame and unhealthy shame. His book focuses on the latter, but he does acknowledge the former.

It's been a while since I read it, so I don't remember exactly what he said, but here is how I distinguish between the two.

Healthy shame says "I am ashamed that I did that, because I am a better person than that." This kind of shame moves us to improve. And when we improve, we can shed the shame.

Unhealthy shame says "I am ashamed that I did that, because it shows how I am a horrible person." This kind of shame can paralyze us.

This is definitely good advice. The spiral is what gets you.

Ya there’s one thing I did decades ago that has part of me stuck. I think it’s just that one thing I can never move on from

I think I 'spiraled' It hasn't been easy getting over it. Not there yet.

I’ve never done much to be ashamed off.

Acceptance of simply ...what is....is and of itself, a beautiful thing.

Indeed.
Problem is, sometimes others will hold you to those flub ups like it's life or death, when you've grown from them.

I treat my shame like a little ghost. A small haunting in my mind so that I don't repeat mistakes. I accept it, but it didn't go away, and I'm glad.