My mother was the same way with money. I'd save my birthday money, but as soon as pops was laid off, she'd say they needed it to pay bills. She would obsess about how much money us kids had in our savings, after we were grown adults, even to the point of looking for our check books in our rooms.
All I can suggest is to move out and get out there on your own. I lived at home for too long and should have left sooner. I became a better man after having moved out.

There are 8 billion humans on the planet not to mention untold numbers of animals. Don't sit around waiting for God. His busy. Besides he gave us everything we need. And his angels are amongst us. They're called dogs. Get one. You'll be better for it.

Poor kid. You are really winding yourself up, aren't you? *HUGS*

School is always a terribly hard time. I still remember my school days...and I remember exactly how I felt when I couldn't balance my personal life, the demands of my family, and the heavy requirements of school.

Try, if you can, to live in this ONE moment. Do what you have to do for school, but wall off the past in your own mind. Keep busy.

Do not dwell on this injustice...because one day you will have wealth and prosperity. I KNOW it. Move on without rancor, and be ONLY in the now.

God could NEVER hate you, because you are His beloved child. Remember that the LOVE God feels for you is ALWAYS there...and He will ALWAYS take care of you and watch over you.

I can only answer, he doesn't hate you. I won't answer the rest, but I'll remind you to hold your savings for when you need them?

i feel you 🥲