And had it not been for the lockdown chances are your kids would've largely been okay, we forget I think just how hard is to be a teen in normal times, then the lockdown came and screwed up vast amounts of people.
You've got one studying law at uni so you've obviously done something right as a mother for that to have been possible.
Try not to give up your hopes for them and keep supporting them, they may yet surprise you.
I've had a number of times that I have felt very similar. Also a mother of 4 that wonder what the point is. at some point, our kids move on and make their own choices that are nothing like we think they should be making. It will be ok. Their lives will continue to change as well as yours.
This kind of story and feelings doesn't surprise me at all. When I was growing up my father didn't want my mother to work. He didn't want children really but she did so she had me and my sister. Looking back I see that all that time she had from not having a real job to taking care of us was her job and there wasn't really much anything she didn't do. She took that job on and did the best she could. I don't think any child turns out exactly the way parents want them to. I know myself and my sister did not LOL. But we turned out okay and had our own lives. Your story isn't over yet and I hope that it gets better in future years. I think maybe you've done better than you think! I think parents need to remind themselves that although they had these babies, that these babies they have really don't belong to them. As they grow, despite all the best efforts, they still form their own personalities and their own ways of thinking.... good or bad. They grow sometimes into people we had no idea they would become. I think parents can only hope that some of what they teach their kids sinks in enough to help them have the skills to make the right decisions at the right times. Hang in there and good luck. From the sounds of it, you haven't failed. You've done the best you could at the times. 🙂 If my mom were alive today it would not surprise me if I heard some of the same words come out of her mouth that you have just spoken here. I can't say I would take offense to it. I don't think a mother's job is ever easy.
I'm glad I didn't see this on Father's Day. But since I'm here, I have never and do not now regret what we did raising the kids. In a way, being a parent in a family is a microcosm of humanity. We, if we can look beyond our lifespan, are acting for the future of our exceptional species.
Perhaps you indeed feel like that, but you're not waste. You still know what values are. I've been reading about the practical side of being an individualist anarchist. It emphasizes the individual and his or her will over external determinants such as groups, society, traditions, and ideological systems. You sound to me like you do have that will there. Don't feel horrible about anything at all. You did your best :-)
@Gloomy Not really, most inside the church are narrow minded too. Got blocked by one on here for the issue of gay priests let allong bishops. I mean, some people don't even want to discuss. It's been decided so it's fact
@val70 To me that's proof how christianity is seen differently by everyone and it often is a justification for intolerance. Also siblings don't have to love each other
@Gloomy Intolerance comes about naturally. It's what ones does with desire, emotion, outburst, etc. that will define what you are. Love is everywhere. Well, that's my own core idea, but that's my belief. Don't take the group thing but the overriding love thing. Not that I'd love murderers or abusers, nor even slasher movies. I guess that one needs to put the emphasis on the indivual with crankiness again :-)
@deadgerbil Assuming it is, all they say is "work at Mercedes". It could be anything from a manager to the last of the salesmen. If selling weed gets you more than a traditional job, why would people go with the latter?
@Elessar they also seemed to indicate that he lost his place of residence and has nothing now. Hopefully he finds a way to make ends meet with the weed
There is a good chance you aren't even halfway through your life. You have time to do the things you want to do, starting now. Embrace the rest of your life. Your perspective may change.
Why do you say such a thing? You said you enjoyed looking after them and now because they may not live exactly the way you want them to, or are struggling you consider it all worthless.
This is just a snapshot in time. It’s pretty common for these years to be rough. It doesn’t mean your kids won’t find their way eventually. I was a mess until my late 20s.
I understand. When you feel no one appreciates you, why stuck around. You did you part, they are now adults. Your free to live as you want. You earned it.
Raising children is not a waste of a life , especially when they grow up and do well for themselves, and are well put together that is what you did be proud
