what is creepy ,they are adults

Creepy is a sweet word for it, is my honest response. I can understand but then, I also cannot. Each to their own of course but what is a 50 yo man or woman doing with a 20 yo ?
The biggest relationship in my life started when I was 19 and he was 37. It's still a big gap. I am 37 today and I have caught myself flirting with 20 yo. And the moment I caught myself doing it, I quiet myself.
It's not fair and becomes inevitably manipulative, and I would dare say, even naturally manipulative.
I believe in freedom but I also believe in respect. If a youngster is looking at me with such eyes, I recognise and I know, I treat them with respect and keep them at a distance.

Say anything you want but I've done it twice in my life, later in my 30s I was with a man in his 50s. I don't think it healthy. The way I see it nowadays, such choices stem from trauma from the youngster and unresolved issues and inability to mature from the eldest. The young ones are looking for a parent, extreme anxiety that only an older and more calm person can provide safety for. The old ones I think are looking for acceptance and enthusiasm, after what seems like the world (hence themselves), has let them down.
But guess what, nothing changes and no healing can occur as usually there're so much things hidden in these age gap relationships, because they simply cannot be communicated, as each person is on a completely different phase.

Yes I can see the sweetness, the daring against the world's preconceptions and the freedom, the deep nurturing and care ...but for me the bypassing that's happening, over the years, isn't nutritious, isn't healthy.

Again, each to their own. 10 ish years difference is where I put my line nowadays, and I am not saying I'm not crossing it, but saying that I see it in a completely different light than I used to. Anyone getting involved in such a scenario I'd advise them to pause and allow it time.

Now when these people are married and have a child... I'm harsh, I don't know what to say.
There's love I can say, that can overpass and cross and bridge. There are solutions and ways and middle grounds. Life isn't perfect and it's messy...
And age is one thing. There are tons of couples having the same age and suffering between them from a thousand of other issues. People hate and kill eachother for a thousand of imaginative things. So, I'd say, in the end of the day, it's love we're talking about and so I'd let it be, as a sweet thing, very different point from where I started in my reply to this thread...:)

I hope I'm not tiring you with the long text ..

Clearly they lasted and stuck together that whole time. So it doesn’t come across as creepy at all. Had a daughter. Raised her all the way into adulthood.

It’s definitely uncommon. But creepy to me would be people hooking up for only one thing.

Instead what you described is a genuine relationship.

That's a large gap. My girlfriend(soon to be fiancee) is 15 years younger than I. We've also been together 15 years. But, we didn't grow up in the same world, didn't watch the same TV shows or listen to the same pop music, etc., so there are challenges.

Yeah, that's total creepy. It even bugs me when they are more then couple years different then me.

I've always been with someone near my own age. That my be just me.

Maybe if he took advantage of her innocence 😏 as far as the age tho i was 21 and my hub was 48 when we met which is 27 years apart.. so.. i cant say anything.. his ex and kids hate us tho but she’s hateful anyway nothing to do with me

I'd feel sorry for that woman. What do you know in 19? You think you know it all but you don't and a lot of things are guided by hormones. On the other hand, if she's happy then nobody has the right to take that away from her by stupid comments rooting in their own personal sense of morality.

Every southern U.S person here is confused by your question 😂. It's so common here it's actually preferable for both.

As long as theyre both of age and happy in my opinion that's all that matters.

So they have an adult daughter ? Sounds like a successful marriage . You can feel however you want about it. Good for them

No.... a mature man, knows how to treat a woman, hes grounded, knows who he is, not playing games

Lucky guy!

As a female, all you need is to get lucky once and you are set for life. Yea the sex may not be as much fun, but the guy probably has loads of money and soon he will not be that interested in sex so much, so then you can go mess around with young guys AND have all the money in the end.
You have to figure it out when you are young though.

It is creepy. Remember, you are asking this question in a website where people use anonymity to normalize their creepy behaviors. If you want better answers, try a place where people are forced to use their real IDs.

That's called a southern marriage. Usually a minimum 10-15 year gap more like 20-40 year gap

Maybe yeah, but I try giving people the benefit of a doubt

People fall in love... It may not be your thing but it was theirs

STBX was 39 when he married me... I was 19...

Yeah it is

Yea, that lady knows what she got into. Lonely life taking care of old dude. Talk about given up her youth to old guy.

Yeah, I’d find that creepy, too.

Pretty strange and weird

I find it predatory.

no I plan to meet an 18 year old when I'm 100

Did u get embarrassed

When he was 19 she wasnt even born til he was near 30. Guy is a creep. A groomer. Knew he couldnt find someone his own age so he got with a teen.

A persons prefrontal cortex isn’t fully formed until they’re 25😐

Did you hear banjos? Yeah, that's creepy!

It's a big gap but not creepy

Yes ...very creepy ...disgusting even

Ew