sigh.... I live in make believe, yet it will be nice to share my believes.If I talked to a Christian they are so biblical and disregard what I want to say. If I speak to an atheist they disregard a supernatural hand.
Messed up sleeping scheduleMy sleeping schedule is kind of messed up. Today i woke up at 2pm and went back to sleep at 4pm and I just woke up. I felt bored because I had nothing to do and it makes me anxious when I have nothing to do , so I go back to sleep.
I used to be alover. I had my chances with girs, but ever since I stopped working and living islated due to exmental problems and now povertygirls don't flock to me because I don't go out, but I don't have the means. Once I start working girls seem interested in me.II am a virgin but now I'm happy I see truth in virginity, and maybe a few girls I would give my virginity. Nothing like... See More » (1)
I used to not struggle as much but with this economy, I'm struggling and I don't get much money. I live with my parents and pay bills and food.I still have money to spend on food but not as much as I used to. I used to buy food and other things, but now I had cut down drastically.
I think I'm maturing spiritually.I used to be sway by woman easily or tempted by some women. Now it hardly fades me, the desire is still there but no the woman I'm looking for in both inside and outside can match what I seek now, now I'm wrong. I met a couple a girls I thought I... See More »
I don't have enough money to see a psychologist, And it's hard to get a second opinion on some incidents that happen to me.Sure, those incidents still haunt me, but I wonder if they had any meaning. some sort of fulfilling-prophecy,
I'm here checking again. I wish I can talk to someone about something and analyze what I'm saying.I want people that are logical to hear and are straight to see the obvious. And not afraid to ponder a strange interference.
I missed my younger years, from 8 years old to 21 my innocence was greater.from 21 and too 35 it was magical but after 2021 that was when I was already learning how to control psychosis. and not have a toll on me (1)
this video captures me after a long battle with myself and psychosis and schizophrenia.You will be missed psychosis but I don't know if I'm sinning being into alter state of mind. yet, everything has been imprinted deep inside me like something haunting me from time and time, as life becomes discipline. You seem now distant from... See More » (1)
My enemies think they can silence me, if they knew who I was they will know its better to be unknown.feminist thought they dominate with their vjays but now they know a man's pride is greater than a woman's. They said they didn't need men and men have walked away now their crying, nope this cruel generation needs to go away.
Isn't a beautiful virgin Goddess beautiful, if she were not a demon and my psychosis bizaare things I experience I would believe and worship herand be in her arms for eternity. The highest of Heaven the Goddess was radiating light, and she said because I saw your pain and your a virgin I will take into my magical land we can live as one in paradise. because you understand the meaning of love... See More »
When a real Goddess visits you and your playing this song slows and she mimicks the the girl.How I remember that day, a portal was open and I felt like gravity and the voices of her singing will attack me from left and right as if the voices were penetrating my body, so hypnotizing. It was fresh outside and but no sign signs of rain just... See More » (1)
trump hacked my computer that's why now he is thinking about heaven! what spoke you trump?I know more about your state trump than anyone else.
The four horse men of the apocalypse, War, Famine, Conquest and Death, yup they have been unleashed after Christ died.The voice of the Lord strikes with flashes of lightning. 8 The voice of the Lord shakes the desert; the Lord shakes the Desert of Kadesh. 9 The voice of the Lord twists the oaks and strips the forests bare. And in his temple all cry,... See More » (1)
The eucharist raising the Cross and the Body of Christ radiating 1:37 sitting in a chair in 2020 does hallucinations and feeling s of purifying flesh I don't deserve. My where open to crazy world people can't phantom, stuff so profound and deep. But I won't discuss it online because of plagiarism. (1)
one of the last girls came Kelcey, what is strange about Kacey. I was in the psychward thinking about some blondesand I drew one that was 6 feet very beautiful face with no make up, I had align like 22 capsules because maybe I wouldn't be thinking of them If it weren't for those signs. That came as hallucinations. I was working for a couple of month and she... See More »
Strange hallucinations are they a manifestation of my mind or are they sent by the divine?Yet in the course of life something were very very self fulling prophecies very detail prophecies not in traditional sense but rather something of my psyche that by my measures has a low probability of happening, than yes we are speaking more in the... See More »
Well as for some Blonde women with beautiful features some shapely some slim with lady bodies.How can I forget such encounters no desire but the desire of their beauty radiant. yet, it seem we click so well, did some tried to impress me only a view but most were identical. Maybe it was just my mind, what a strange atmosphere during those... See More »
Think how this psychosis began in 2011-2012, if I could revisit the past. It was 2011 I was young and strong yet those moment define my lifeI came mad about trying to understand Good and Evil. Now Im can write a paper about it how Good is objective not subjective (3)
If i play their game i get the same treatment if I offend I get the same treatmentDepraved putrid corrupt people.
I cant get deep sleep. Three months ago my dog messed up my sleeping schedule and i cant get proper sleep.I sleep but get no deep sleep, and im about to try to fix it. Should i sleep every 12 hours or 15-17 hours. I think thats why every thing is screwed up. I want deep sleep ive been tryi g to relax and not get amp up, its working.
I used to dj at small gatherings for free a couple of times.that was back in 2010 those were good times. I was working and everything seem chill
incarceration should be a lot higher. what do you expect when judges and prosecutors let criminals loose.