Would you speak up to a narcissist ex friend?

Let your silence speak for you.

I am not afraid to say what is on my mind.

It gets easier the older (and richer) I get. The more my employer depends on me the easier it is to criticize coworkers since they won't fire me, I am too valuable to them! Also, it is now my job to advise others on what is right and what is wrong.

As for friends: well, the only people I talk to are on here. So it is easy to be open, and block people.

It is harder to "block" relatives. My parents are annoying yet tolerable, and they helped me during my illness. Someday they will be in the hospital. Yet I would rather pay a nurse than help (I am awful, I know!).

I mostly cut off my older brother after lies and a few fist fights (while we were adults!). Yet you might relate a little to him since his girlfriend is going blind from diabetes. So am I!

Listen carefully. Cut off all contact/communication. Do not reply!

There are times when you have to be brutally honest. This is one of those times. Next time she texts you, lay it out there completely. Maybe something like this:

"I know we don't speak much anymore, and it's because of your behavior. I can't keep doing this with you. You try to be my friend, but you're simply not a friend when you put my sister down because of a medical condition she has. Please don't message me anymore, goodbye."

I dunno, just a thought for ya. I can certainly understand how tough something like that has to be and frustrating. I hope you can get it all sorted.

No, narcissism is psychological abuse. Be kind to yourself and don't open that door back up.

Speaking up to her will do no good. At most, just say you are no longer friends, but no explanation is needed.

🫂

I get myself in trouble this way, but I think it's worth questioning is who we label as a narcissist, are they really? It's a term thrown around now, that many can identify with in feelings when they are hurt. Now people want to be rude and then at other times protect people from feelings, so online outside a few I essentially trust no response as there is no context.

I would say your friend was being insensitive, callous, perhaps blind of her actions, but most often I feel if you take away the "label" if there something together you will find it better if you don't look in those terms.

and hugs, I'm sorry you are dealing with a friend who puts herself first.

Narcissists have a tendency to try and destroy the lives of anyone who dares not to like them, so how you cut them off should be directly proportional to how much actual dirt they have on you vs. how much the made up lies they’ll spread will hurt you.

In my case, I don’t have much to go after, so telling my mother and sister to stay the hell out of my life didn’t cost much. Even so, the lies spread through the family were fairly brutal.

You over simplify challenges that people face and take no accountability for your actions so I am terminating our relationship now. Goodbye

Then block over all forms of communication and enjoy the peace

I wouldn’t engage with them. They should know you don’t want to interact anymore.

Why not block her phone number and stop all contact?

I’ve often wondered if it does any good to say anything to a narcissist. If you’ve stopped contact 4 years ago and they don’t care, that says all you need to know.

I wouldn’t contact her or reply to her. She sounds so toxic. You do not need an enemy like that

There's no point in supplying the narc further - the best thing you can do is to continue to ignore.

Do not engage. Repeat, do not engage.

If im cutting someone from my life, im not rude, but i will tell them why, so theres no misunderstanding or coming back from it if I've gotten to that point.

There is no point because they won’t ever get it. Just ignore her.