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Do you allow folks to just drop by your house with little to no prior notice?

I received a text this morning [8am] from someone I used to be good friends with, informing me that she's visiting a relative "around the corner" from me. She asked if I 'have time to chat' before she goes to pickup a friend at the airport.

We only communicate via text on major holidays and birthdays, since she moved to Florida 10 years ago [I'm in MD]. Therefore, I didn't know she was in town.

I have no desire to interact further so I just told her now is not a good time, and that I had other plans.

Is your place open to all visitors at any time?

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Pretzel · 61-69, M

People can knock on my door anytime
Day or night

Of course I only open the door on my terms. It's why I have locks

View 1 more replies »

Pretzel · 61-69, M

@Alessa and your pet alligators?

Alessa · 18-21, F

@Pretzel For that I'd need to put up a sign saying "Sales people welcome" otherwise they are a bit too expensive to feed.

Pretzel · 61-69, M

@Alessa "telemarketers and bible salesmen are welcome any time of the day or night"

OlderSometimesWiser · F

twiigss

I'm not sure when it was, but there's a church nearby where we live, and 2 of it's members knocked on our door just to let us know they are there and that we are welcome at anytime.

We said, okay thanks, and that was that. We haven't gone to that church, just never felt like going to that one.

someonefromsomewhere1

@twiigss Hi :). I want to ask something but dont want to ask it publicly so anyone can see coz some people might make fun of me. Would appreciate it if youll send me a message so i can replay you with my question (coz for some reason i can't message first). Thanx :).

Justafantasy · M

Usually the door is open to most guests. Certain people any hour of day for any reason. Having kids and being in a small town I'd probably answer it for anyone and go help with whatever the problem is

Starcrossed · 41-45, F

No, anyone who knows me well enough to even come by in the first place knows I need/want advanced notice.

someonefromsomewhere1

@Starcrossed Hi :). I want to ask something but dont want to ask it publicly so anyone can see coz some people might make fun of me. Would appreciate it if youll send me a message so i can replay you with my question (coz for some reason i can't message first). Thanx :).

Starcrossed · 41-45, F

@someonefromsomewhere1 honestly that seems super suspicious

Blanchy · 31-35, F

No, it totally depends who the person is. My former best friend and I used to stop by each other any time, mainly she came by my place. It was the most natural thing in the world to me. I don't allow strangers in home however, and I wouldn't want an acquaintance to drop by without notice – I usually decline when people ask. I suppose I just care a lot about my private space.

twiigss

Oh just to add, there was a time, probably back in 1995 or 1996 where I was working on 3rd shift (11pm to 7:00am) and driving into work my car broke down at this intersection. There was a house right on the corner, all of the lights were out but I knocked on their door and they answered, and let me use their phone so I could call home to my dad to say my car had broken down.

You knock on someone's front door nowadays, you're possibly gonna get shot and killed. (which makes no sense to me) If social media is THAT much of a problem, to where information causes people to become insanely hostile, then maybe we should just do away with social media. But hey, what do I know?

This is why I'm glad we have cellphones now. In case of an emergency, I can reach out to family members for help, call a tow truck, etc.

Adogslife · 61-69, M

If you don’t like me enough to let me know your plans beforehand, I don’t like you enough to invite you over.

So, that’d be a resounding, “No.”

DreamyCrush · F

@Adogslife Exactly.

darkmere1983 · 46-50, M

no i don't like visitors except for my elderly parents who are very welcome, otherwise, no, i'm very reclusive and like to stay in my own space.

SW-User

Not necessarily but we do get visitors from time to time and they sometimes don't call first before arriving. It happens and I never know why

Morvoren · F

Yes. I like visitors. There’s always a well stocked kitchen in my house and a fresh made bed in the spare room. 🙂

Picklebobble2 · 56-60, M

Good for you.

Nothing worse than being somebody else's afterthought.

And the nerve !

someonefromsomewhere1

@Picklebobble2 Hi :). I want to ask something but dont want to ask it publicly so anyone can see coz some people might make fun of me. Would appreciate it if youll send me a message so i can replay you with my question (coz for some reason i can't message first). Thanx :).

CountScrofula · 41-45, M

Nah, my wife is too anxious for it. We really prefer the heads-up.

someonefromsomewhere1

@CountScrofula Hi :). I want to ask something but dont want to ask it publicly so anyone can see coz some people might make fun of me. Would appreciate it if youll send me a message so i can replay you with my question (coz for some reason i can't message first). Thanx :).

ArishMell · 70-79, M

It can be inconvenient but it happens so infrequently it does not bother me too much.

Besides, how do you ban anyone from doing so, as the question implies doing?

The most likely unannounced visitors are my sisters, who don't live far away, and they are welcome.

DreamyCrush · F

@ArishMell If they just show up unannounced, I won't answer the door.

If I did not invite them and they text that they're "in the neighborhood", I will decline the visit, as I am rarely in the mood for company.

ArishMell · 70-79, M

@DreamyCrush The only type I don't want are door-to-door evangelists, charity representatives and sales-people, but such callers are rare now.

They are normally easy to get rid of, but I do so politely.

I've had two or three attempts by local Jehovah's Witnesses, who are a bit peeved when I call theirs a "cult", but I am not nasty to them personally. I was stopped recently in the street by two young men representing some fringe church - I simply said "No thank you" and walked on.

I don't receive "in the neighbourhood" texts but that phrase commonly refers to "surveyors" in landline 'phone calls from firms trying to sell loft insulation, usually referring to imaginary "surveys" or "records", or "government grants".

The biggest hazard are fly-by-night, cash-in-hand "tradesmen" calling to try to trick you into paying a lot of money for building work you don't need or want, and they would probably carry out to a poor standard anyway.

My sisters are different. They are welcome and don't call very often anyway even though we live within walking distances of each other. Usually either will ring me first anyway.

exexec · 61-69, C

Sure. People stop by unannounced all the time. It's fine with us.

MyMonstersAreReal

Nope, noone is allowed to come by unannounced

JimboSaturn · 51-55, M

I hate that. I don't like unannounced visits.

DearAmbellina2113 · 41-45, F

NO. I hate when people do that.

HotPizza71 · 51-55, M

@DearAmbellina2113 Not without a ticket 😝🙈

mainvane · 61-69, M

only with a few close friends

someonefromsomewhere1

@mainvane Hi :). I want to ask something but dont want to ask it publicly so anyone can see coz some people might make fun of me. Would appreciate it if youll send me a message so i can replay you with my question (coz for some reason i can't message first). Thanx :).

Thevy29 · 41-45, M

People can come around anytime.

Delightfulydelectablydelicious · M

Only if they bring me cookies 🍪 🍪 😀

DragonFruit · 61-69, M

That depends on who it is...family and close friends can give me short notice and I don't mind, but other acquaintances should give me enough notice and wait for me to OK it.

Jenny1234 · 51-55, F

I don’t answer my door so when my sister shows up for her unannounced visits, I don’t answer the door.

DreamyCrush · F

@Jenny1234 I would make an exception for my sister as long as she doesn't have anyone with her.

4meAndyou · F

No. Even very good friends can't just drop in whenever they feel like it. I must have some notice.

Lilymoon · F

At least she gave you notice. The worst ones are the ones who drop by out of the blue. 😖 🤬

Pretzel · 61-69, M

@Lilymoon I believe that's why they invited the moat

This comment is hidden. Show Comment

Ambroseguy80 · 56-60, M

Nope, that would be insane to allow drop-by visitors. Our house is usually in total chaos.

RosaAnn1 · 56-60, F

@Jenny1234,Your sister should never get that from you. She’s your sister for heaven sake. She should be the exception to all that. I sure would appreciate it if my sister would come by even occasionally even unannounced. She’s in town practically every week but doesn’t stop by. I miss her much. Life is short, visit often.

Jenny1234 · 51-55, F

@RosaAnn1 if you met my sister you would understand. Not everyone has the same relationship with their siblings that you do

HumanEarth · 56-60, F

Don't have a cellphone, so they can't do that text thing

DownTheStreet · 56-60, M

I don’t have time for everyone so I only say yes to the super hot ones

Underconstruction · F

I like to receive advanced notice.

I do the same in return.

ChipmunkErnie · 70-79, M

If they're lucky we MIGHT open the door to see who's there.

metaldog

Nah it doesn't bother me...come anytime

Fluffybull · F

Nope. I hate people "dropping in". 😱😱😱😱

Nebula · 41-45, F

Ugh, I don't like it

someonefromsomewhere1

@Nebula Hi :). I want to ask something but dont want to ask it publicly so anyone can see coz some people might make fun of me. Would appreciate it if youll send me a message so i can replay you with my question (coz for some reason i can't message first). Thanx :).

someonefromsomewhere1

Hi :). I want to ask something but dont want to ask it publicly so anyone can see coz some people might make fun of me. Would appreciate it if youll send me a message so i can replay you with my question (coz for some reason i can't message first). Thanx :).

TheFragile · 46-50, M

Yes. I'm very welcoming.

someonefromsomewhere1

Barebum61 · 61-69, M

No I feel invaded

Gingerbreadspice · F

She did message you so she did give you prior warning and didn’t just turn up. I think she was asking you if you would like a visit or chat. In this case I might not have minded so much.

someonefromsomewhere1

@Gingerbreadspice Hi :). I want to ask something but dont want to ask it publicly so anyone can see coz some people might make fun of me. Would appreciate it if youll send me a message so i can replay you with my question (coz for some reason i can't message first). Thanx :).

RedBaron · M

How rude

uncalled4 · 56-60, M

I have no idea why people invite themselves over others' houses. It's tacky. Not everyone keeps their place "guest friendly" 24/7. I know I don't. Looks like Guitar Center and Home Depot both blew up. I don't want people to see it. I don't want people to come over.
You don't mind that your place looks like a demilitarized zone? Fine for you, but not for me.