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Captainjackass is using Similar Worlds.
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This profile may contain Mildly Adult content.
956 views · 20 followers · Online: Recently (date?)
IM STANDING RIGHT BEHIND YOU
About Me
Days Active
2 Yrs Active
Join Time
1st 6 Mths of SW
Comments
5000 Comments
Questions
250 Questions
Am I the only one getting sweaty butt rash?
It’s so hot out 😭
26-30, M
2
6 replies
11 views
1 day ago
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Situations
Why is it that right as my shift ends at work some junkie comes into the store and acts insane.
I finally have some days off and that happens at the last minute 🤦🏻‍♂️
26-30, M
5
6 replies
12 views
Jul 8, 2019
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Situations
Why must I be so awkward?
Ugh 😖
26-30, M
1
6 replies
9 views
Jul 6, 2019
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Situations
I’m now convinced that my cat is a witch.
She disappears all day and I cannot find her after tearing my apartment apart. She has to be invisible or teleporting somewhere cause she never even goes out into the hallway and is terrified of everything.
26-30, M
3
8 replies
14 views
Jun 24, 2019
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Pets, Animals & Nature
How do I get people to tell me their deepest darkest secrets like Selah does?
I think she uses witchcraft or something cause people just tell her everything and I want that power too.
26-30, M
0
3 replies
15 views
Jun 23, 2019
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Doing Good
Ugh I have horrible gas but can’t just fart it out
This is the worst feeling ever 😖
26-30, M
1
21 replies
21 views
Jun 18, 2019
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Situations
It always annoys me that when someone escapes from the bad guy.
They always just run away instead of doing something like picking up the bad guys gun or something rational that way the bad guy can chase them and catch them.
26-30, M
1
4 replies
5 views
Jun 16, 2019
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Movies & TV
Why does my cat have to take up so much of the bed?
Seriously shes a fraction my size but is somehow making me lay of the edge of the bed 🤦🏻‍♂️.
26-30, M
4
8 replies
20 views
Jun 13, 2019
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Pets, Animals & Nature
Ugh why am I up so late again?
Smack me with a rolling pin!
26-30, M
0
2 replies
5 views
Jun 9, 2019
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Doing Good
Why must quizzes be so damn irritating?
Seriously it’s only orientation quizzes and yet I’m about five seconds away from punching a hole in the wall.
26-30, M
0
2 replies
2 views
Jun 7, 2019
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Seeking Advice
Why is it right when I go to sleep that my cats decide then to pay attention to me
And by pay attention I mean climb all over me and force me to pet them and put their butts in my face 😑
26-30, M
3
4 replies
5 views
Jun 4, 2019
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Pets, Animals & Nature
I’m watching the strain
This is how vampires should be. Terrifying monsters that kill everyone and are scary looking not pretty boys with make up or fancy counts with capes.
26-30, M
2
0 replies
0 views
Jun 3, 2019
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Doing Good
Ugh I have horrible gas right now but I can’t fart
This is the most uncomfortable feeling ever 😖
26-30, M
2
8 replies
27 views
May 28, 2019
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Doing Good
This makes me think of Selah
https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/greatgrandmother-fends-off-300-pound-burglar-in-his-boxers-with-baseball-bat-he-better-be-glad-i-didnt-have-a-gun-215553499.html Don’t mess with her when she’s got a baseball bat!
26-30, M
3
1 reply
10 views
May 25, 2019
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Doing Good
Whiskey is gross
It tastes bad and burns going down. I’ll never understand why cowboys love it in movies.
26-30, M
1
14 replies
19 views
May 15, 2019
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Situations
Rub my back.
My back hurts!
26-30, M
0
0 replies
1 views
May 15, 2019
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Doing Good
Do you think I should just be a hooker?
There’s not much competition for it around here and I think I can wear a wig pretty good.
26-30, M
0
6 replies
22 views
May 14, 2019
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Community
A kid asked what his first step should be in being a superhero and fight crime.
I told him put down the comic book and he flipped out in me. What happened to teenagers wanting to be something that actually exists?
26-30, M
2
11 replies
11 views
May 12, 2019
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Miscellaneous
Why do they always put restaurants right next to the gym?
I always smell something delicious right as I leave and it’s so frustrating to not be able to eat right then.
26-30, M
7
6 replies
8 views
May 8, 2019
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Situations
I don’t understand why they always have wires of different color on tv bombs.
They always have to snip one wire but not the other colored one. Wouldn’t they all probably just be the same color?
26-30, M
1
5 replies
7 views
Apr 30, 2019
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Doing Good
Captainjackass | Similar Worlds