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BLP11520

61-69, M

United States

Married

Straight

Discussion, Friends, Advice, Support, Stories, Learning, Look Around

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Married but talkative

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Good to be older

Being older than 40 means, telephones with cameras, didn’t record all the stupid things you did, when you were young😂

Pregnancy, joke, time

My friend gave his girlfriend 4 pregnancy tests and they all came out positive. Her answer was how are we gonna feed 4 kids?

Police joke, sorta

Officer responded to a call and old lady shot her husband for stepping on freshly mop floor officer radios the call in, well have you arrested the woman yet? No I haven’t. The floors are still wet.😂

Redneck word of the day a tractor

Hey Jimbo? How do you get a farm girl to marry you? A tractor.

Redneck, definition

What do you call a hippie‘s wife ? Mississippi.

Coworkers 🤪thoughts

Advice for married men

When she starts arguing start undressing getting in bed, she’ll have a headache and fall asleep

Ladies, would you wear this hat?

Redneck word of the day Au jus

Jimbo stop it I au jus just kidding me!

Age, joke, sort of

you know you’re old when your bills come more than you do

Redneck word of the day fetus

We had a company meeting and I got hungry and I said when you gonna fetus?

Employment, joke, kind of

I asked my boss why he only hired married men. He said we are used to taking orders and being yelled at😂

A woman was laying in bed and said to her husband make me scream with one finger, so he poked me in the eye!!!

Genie in a bottle joke

I found a genie in a bottle. He granted me ten wishes I said wait I thought it was three? The genie said well all the trouble you’re in you’re gonna need 10.

Good Samaritan, not really joke

I senior lady had her credit card declined at the grocery store so I helped her out it took longer than I thought putting her groceries back

Traffic, citation, joke, kind of

A cop pulled me over for speeding I said, can I get a warning he said you’ll get a warning when pigs fly I answered you on helicopters don’t you?

Marriage, joke, kind of

Husband and the wife are sitting on the porch. The husband is drinking whiskey. He says I love you the wife says thanks the husband says no I was talking to the whiskey.

My wife should be her ex at the end of the bar. She turned him down for a marriage I said oh he still celebrating, huh?

Should marriage licenses expire as often as drivers licenses

Being a jackass joke

So a dude was trying to find his car in a parking lot. Every time he held up his remote, I honked my horn.

Technology, joke, kind of

The first computer was on Apple. It was owned by Adam and Eve it had low capacity, one biyte and everything crashed.

Clothing, joke, kind of

I texted my wife and said I tripped over your bra this morning. She said yeah it was a booby trap.

Just an observation

Have you ever seen alcohol companies using drunks to advertise their product? Are they ashamed? Just saying😂

Age, joke, sorta

You know you’re getting older when friends with benefits means someone who can drive at night time

Dietary joke, kinda

Why don’t cannibals eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

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